Will I truly ever get over what happened?

[MissingAWoman]

I came so close to being a girl's first love and first everything.

Back in 2020, I was in a coding forum and met this devout Catholic girl who was homeschooled. She was 17 at the time, almost 18. I remember the very first conversation we had till this day. We really hit it off.

She later disclosed she never had a boyfriend or a first love. She had a crush on a guy but she was never close to him. In fact, she never had a male friend before she met me.

We talked every day and formed an online thing. I remember us talking about getting married at one point, where we would go on our honeymoon, and how we would name our kids. I was anticipating on marrying her.

A week after her 18th birthday, I went to go see her. She rejected me upon meeting in person. I was crushed beyond words.

Fast forwarding, she recently married this guy a few months ago who got to be her first everything. I still have nightmares about it. I had to be hospitalized because it was so traumatizing to me.

My biggest fear is not being able to find another woman like Rachel was when we first met. I fear that I will not find another girl that has never had her first love.

Yes

No

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1 y

Girls, any more thoughts?

[idk87334F]

I definitely believe you will! Believe it or not, although rare, there ARE still girls like Rachel who are devout when it comes to their religion, and those who have never had a romantic relationship (if you want an example, then I'm one AHAHA since I'm devout in my religion and I have never been in a romantic relationship). I will tell you this though; everything happens for a reason. If she really was the "one" for you, then she would have chosen you. One day, there will be a girl who you really love that will love you so much, and you two will have the same values and all. Keep on doing your best, and stay strong.

[MissingAWoman]

Thank you so much! Yes, I am hoping to find another girl like her one day and we be each other's first real relationship. Hopefully, she is out there for me.

[LazerBean]

You need a therapist. That is an unhealthy obsession and you should have gotten over it like 6 years ago at least. Having such poor mental health and such an obsession with another girl pretty muchakea your chances of pulling the girl you want 0% likely to happen. You need to get healthy before you start getting into a relationship, or you will only drag other people down.

[MissingAWoman]

It has been 2 years since then. I just want a woman without a romantic past, just like she was when we first met. Why should I settle for less? I have always wanted that, even before I met her. I just thought I got lucky at that time, and I want to be that lucky again.

[MissingAWoman]

Hello?

[Zolly99999]

Wow just wow. That really sucks. I too have been. Rejected like that so I make it a point to make sure we know what we both look like before meeting. Some people are looks driven no matter good your personalities mesh.

The older you get the harder it will be to find someone like her... The "firsts" go fast.

[MissingAWoman]

Do you think I still have another chance to find another girl like that?

[Zolly99999]

Honestly... Maybe bit will be tough sorry to say

[Zygum]

This world is very vast, there are lot of girls, who are virgin, so do not worry, you will get gift of your choice

[MissingAWoman]

Thank you, although it is not so much about virginity as it is whom she loved before. I hope me and a woman can be each other's first loves.

[Anonymous]

You had no business being with someone that young. And the way you’re talking about her suggests that you were only interested in taking her innocence. She dodged a massive bullet by rejecting you. Good for her.

[MissingAWoman]

But she is now married. If she is "that young", then why is she able to marry then?
I liked her more than just her innocence. She had traditional values and was conservative like me.

[Opinion Owner]

She’s too young for YOU. She was still a minor when you were talking to her.

[MissingAWoman]

She was almost 18. I was 25. Both her parents approved of me and invited me to come see her. I cared about her, and age shouldn't matter.

[Opinion Owner]

She was a minor when you were talking to her. She was way too young for you.

[Opinion Owner]

My thoughts remain the same.

[MissingAWoman]

I wanted to be with her. I would have given my life to her and our family

[Opinion Owner]

Yeah well you can’t. And she obviously didn’t want to be with you. So it’s time to stop moping around over a girl you cannot have and get on with your life. The sooner you accept that the better.

[MissingAWoman]

Can I find another girl like her when we first met? One without a romantic past?

[Anonymous]

yes, but you seem stuck/obsessed with it, might be beneficial with some professional help if you did not try that yet

[MissingAWoman]

I have been undergoing therapy. Although, I still want a woman without a romantic past just like Rachel was when we first met.