Search Results: take back girlfriend

I've been very passive most of my life, often keeping my differing opinion to myself when in a group setting such as in a classroom, but if someone asked me directly, I'd have little hesitation stating my differing opinion.

For instance, back in high school, a girl was complaining about getting a detention for using her phone during class earlier in the day. I didn't say anything but when she said my name, looked at me and said "right"? As if to ask me to vouch for her seeing as how I was there as well, but to her surprise, I said "well, you've been using your phone in class for quite some time and she's told you multiple times to stop but you continued, so yeah you got a detention for it".

This angered her as expected and seemed to shock her as she's a big figure in the "popular crowd" and likely was used to people affirming her but I threw a curveball she didn't expect.

Over the years, I've become more passive aggressive and about a year ago when a slight change to my medication for anger management, depression and ADHD, I've now become more assertive than passive. I take absolutely no issue inserting my opinion into a discussion when it's contrary to the popular one. Even when there's a good chance someone may get offended by what I say.

While I also take no issue in acknowledging the limitations I have in regards to topics I know little about, like cars and such, in those cases, I make my unfamiliarity clear and delegate to those who are familiar. I also tend to probe others opinions when stated in a general manner, wanting to know what led them to their conclusion.

I'd call this a positive development for me and my girlfriend of 2 years seems to like this development as well. I wouldn't consider myself confident nor self loathing, just realistic and abel to acknowledge that there's nothing special about me.

I am curious how others view this though, do you find it attractive if someone is outspoken and isn't afraid to offend others?

My parents and I moved to Texas from Connecticut in 2018 and we're now able to see family much more regularly. I've grown tired of it though as there's no chemistry between me and them most of the time. My cousin and her husband and kids, I have good chemistry with and we can talk for hours. But my immediate family, all they want to do is sit and listen to horrible music from the 70s and get hammered drunk.

It's also a 90 minute drive to get to where they live and when I arrive, it's like I'm a ghost, they just want me there for the sake of being there. Then after an hour or so, I leave to go back before they get drunk so I won't have to deal with that. There's a ranch as well that we go to but it's 4 hours away and they do the same thing there. Sometimes they let me and my cousin's husband shoot guns on the range and my uncle even took me hunting 4 times in the past 4 years I've been here.

It's very pretty there but then coworkers soon show up and start getting drunk, then it all goes downhill from there. I work 55 hours per week in a job at my uncle's construction company but i don't make much and rent is literally 4× what it was in 2019 and continuing to increase well beyond what my job will allow me to afford. I'm taking steps to start a career in LE and I'll be able to slowly but surely transition into my own home by then.

The juice isn't worth the squeeze, if you can even call it that since I don't find enjoyment in spending time with them sitting down. I often go to the bathroom but after doing so, I go to my car and leave and nobody really notices. I didn't go to the ranch for Christmas or Easter. The only person I really want in my life right now is my girlfriend, I've even gone as far as muting all messages besides her. A medication change in late 2021 has made me much more assertive and ready to stand my ground and not let them manipulate me into doing something I don't want to do.

Do you like family gatherings?

Me and my long distance girlfriend have been together for 2 years and we talk every single day with a bit of communication here and there throughout the day. Some things that have prevented us from closing the distance is the fact that I didn't get vacation days at my current job of which I work 55 hours per week for the past 3 years until finally I got 2 weeks to use this year.

Her parents are divorced and she lives with her mom and 3 little brothers. Her mom is too crazy as well as being physically and mentally handicapped, she's been afraid that if she tells her mom, she'll kick her out. My girlfriend helps her work but gets very little and she drives her 3 little brothers to and from school as well as her mom to and from work every day.

Then she cooks, cleans the dishes, puts them away, goes grocery shopping, does the laundry and folds it, vacuums, takes her brothers to and from their sports games at night every day, takes them to and from church and her dad's house, and she also goes to college full time.

In between each of those things, we talk. She also pays her student loans by herself since her mom won't pay and her dad won't either but I help her as best I can with the money I have to keep her afloat. I'm pursuing a career soon but I want to see her first with my vacation days as it'll likely be at least a year before I get vacation time in my career but she's very scared of being caught although one of her good cousins knows and is supportive of us.

I love her with all of my heart and I understand why she doesn't want her mom to know but I'm tired of her family members holding her and us back. I live at home, too but that's due to the recent rent spike in which rent literally tripled and now I can't afford my own place until i start my career. My family members have drained me and I disconnected with them. She and I intend to have her move in with me in 2 years but her family needs to stop leaning on her, what should I do?