I just slept with an escort to lose my virginity, what does this mean for my future prospects dating?

[Anonidunno]

There are a whole lot of details here I need to explain before anyone answers this: first off: I'm 25 as of last week so no I'm not a young man with no confidence looking for more. Secondly, I didn't reach this age as a virgin because of a lack of ability to get laid either. In highschool I was voluntarily celibate. I had multiple chances with women that I passed up on account of that, and I had a few girlfriends that in retrospect were quite unhappy with me not having sex with them and that probably led to poor outcomes in those relationships.
Well I took a few years off from dating in my early adulthood to figure myself out on my own, I didn't seek casual sex or girlfriends because I didn't want to entangle anyone else with my own problems, but eventually, I got over those problems and figured out my life, for the most part at least. The one thing I had left to do really was to go out and start dating again: this was February 2020.
The pandemic ruined those plans. I joined a volleyball league and like the third night of it was shut down on account of the virus. Obviously I didn't do many other public things after that.
I'll also mention that I had not to that point done online dating, so when everyone moved to online dating for the next year and a half or whatever the thought didn't cross my mind because I was busy worrying about viruses and then my career and then the lovely slow motion financial collapse we are experiencing.
Following that experience I went back out publicly to try and date again, and then I actually caught covid like night one of doing so.

I can go on but while I was sick I tried buying a car because my old one was starting to look like crap and unattractive and I knew that wouldn't help my chances of getting a girlfriend, then the dealership kept delaying giving it to me and somehow in all of thise shit I turned 25.

Sleeping with an escort sucked. I prefer real romance. Can I get that again or am I marked forever now?

Updates

1 y

You know, I've been thinking about this a couple days, and this whole thing is bullshit. People just want to one-up one another on how great they are at getting women so they tell all kinds of bullshit lies that confuse anyone who isn't experienced, reproducing their shitty lifestyle. Sex might fundementally changes a woman but not a man. Men are like bucks in the world of deer. The strong and smart ones get the does come mating season and experience doesn't matter.

Updates

1 y

I don't think anyone here understands the term "volcel" either, so I will clarify. A volcel is voluntarily celibate. They chose to be celibate on their own. I chose to be so because I was raised in a traditional manner, and didn't realize how different other people were raised. I didn't, as a teenager, realize that the girls I was with took it personally that I didn't want to fuck and probably thought it meant I didn't like them or that I was gay or whatever.

[SteveSmith1985]

Honestly, I do think you can get that again. Since there was no emotional connection, while you technically may not be a virgin anymore... you never did have that MEANINGFUL first-time experience. You're still gonna share that with somebody. You aren't marked forever. You'll just probably feel kinda shitty UNTIL you have that first real experience to replace this bad one in your mind. I really do think you'll be ok though. Best of luck 🙂

[PatriceONeal]

Not gna read that wall.

You haven't earned it yet so you're confidence can't honestly improve. You at least know how good it feels or can feel. So that anxiety is gone? but earn it like men can and women can't, and you'll feel like a badass. You might even wink at yourself in a mirror.

[TacosRAwesome]

Probably nothing. The reason you couldn't get a regular girl to sleep with you and had to resort to a prostitute hasn't been cancelled just because you're no longer a virgin.

[Anonidunno]

There is no reason I couldn't. You didn't read the explaination. I had opportunities in the past, I didn't take them. I was young and naieve and had been taught sex was bad. I changed my perspective. Literally the moment I went out to date again covid happened and then I had career issues as the result of the pandemic and then I ended up a older than I expected with less experience than I expected.

The question here is phrases wrong I suppose. This isn't about "can I get a girlfriend now". I've done it before, not sure why I can't do it again. This is about trust, really. Do I have to hide this shit forever or not? I can date again. Most men lie about their sexual histories anyway.

[laurieluvsit]

It just means that you have now eliminated a large block of them that won't want anything more to do with you is all.

[normalice]

It means nothing at all. Absolutely no one cares about men's sex lives. As long as you aren't diseased or a rapist the vast majority of girls will be unmoved by anything you have to confess to them about your sexual history.

[Guy13]

Man, I’m sorry you seemingly regret and sense Loss. You might find better and more real response from the woman only option? Maybe not🤷🏻‍♂️🤷🏻‍♂️

[Anonidunno]

That's really what I want is the opinion of a woman. Preferably multiple women. I can provide all the male opinion I need by myself. And yes, I sense that there isn't much a hooker can do I can't with my own right hand, but I might have traded a lot of respect from people just to find that out.

[Guy13]

If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us of our sins and to cleanse us from unrighteousness (1John1:9). Leave the shame and guilt there with God…. No one else needs to know about it. Get right with God. The world will always be the world judging you for Success and Failure…who needs that🤷🏻‍♂️

[Anonidunno]

I don't need none of that "God" stuff. That's why we are here in the first place. If not for that I'd have lost my virginity at 15 when I had my first chance instead of passing it up. Don't need your guilt, don't need your rules.

[Guy13]

Fair enough…

[exitseven]

It is a part of your past but does not define you. You will find somebody you will have a real relationship and whan the both of you are ready you will have sex.

[Drumlin2001]

Nobody will ever know unless you tell them.
I doubt it will change much for you, maybe even focus your mind to what you do want.

[LazerBean]

Mainly very promiscuous women and strippers will be into you.

[JakeS00]

You just learn from it and go find a real woman for romance.

[Anonidunno]

That's what I'm leaning toward but the whole occurrence kind of makes me wonder how much of a problem I might have with control. Not of other people mind you, I accept other people have their own ways of going about life. It's excessive need to control myself. Basically I went and did something that a lot of other people would not find acceptable simply because I didn't know how I would react and I didn't want to find out I would react poorly when in a real relationship.

[MountAverage]

Such a long ass text only to eventually go from "I turned 25" to "sleeping with an escourt sucked". Thanks for the longest non-explanation ever.

[Anonidunno]

This is ultimately a question here. If you weren't here to answer, why you complaining?

[MountAverage]

You clearly intended to give us background information on why you went to an escourt when you wrote all that text, but then in the end didn't give the one crucial information. What was the point?
You want useful opinions? Give proper information.

[Anonidunno]

Ok. Why? Cuz I didn't know what sex was like I guess, having not done it. I guess it was just to find out how I would react, to have an informed (if poorly informed) opinion. Now I do. Point is, what I learned, is that I shouldn't have cared really, and now I can't go back and say to myself "Dude it literally doesn't matter just go out and date and wherever shit goes it goes." Now I have a history. I can continue like it doesn't matter but now I have a skeleton in my closet. I didn't have that before.

[MountAverage]

Alright, thanks!

You're looking at it the wrong way. That experience was valuable because you learned from it. That's all that matters. As for the skeleton in your closet - you can keep it to yourself until you feel like you've met someone who won't judge you for it.

[bootieclapper9000]

nothing
women in general are prostitutes lol

the girl working a 9 to 5 is no different from the girl you just had sex with lol

[Anonidunno]

So basically you're saying that women use sex as a way to get men to do shit and when it's for a single sum of money other women get mad that essentially somebody broke rank for an easy reward?

I know this is true to a significant extent I just don't want to be in that sort of relationship where either side is pretty openly trying to exploit the other.

This is why MGTOW exists I guess. Men who don't want to be exploited just resigning themselves to prostitutes and pornography.

None of those things are my thing though.

[bootieclapper9000]

I do not even date bro lol

cause even prostitutes will bring problems

so staying single
and do the things I enjoy

one of them is spreading the truth

of Christ and also the red pill truth

so less men get used

[peedy]

Nothing what they don't know won't hurt them and why would it what does it really matter everyone has a past don't live in it live n the future

[007kingifrit]

women will never know and it will never matter. you can date whenever you want

[Anonymous]

was the sex with the escort enjoyable?

[Anonidunno]

No not really.

[Opinion Owner]

oh how come?

[Anonidunno]

I'm not really into just fucking for the sake of the act. It was pretty lame. Guess I had to go that far just to find that out.

[Anonymous]

Why was the sex with the escort not enjoyable?

[Avicenna]

Nothing

[jimmy2]

Don't worry