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In my friend group, there are 2 guys that are married and they have completely different marriages.

Friend A: His wife constantly checks on him. He works from home, she works in office, and whenever she has a break, she calls to see what he’s doing. He claims that he loves it, but to me it seems like she’s always monitoring him. During my birthday party 2 years ago, she called him 4 times in a 3 hour span to see where he was at and ask if it was over. One time, we left his house and drove 15 minutes to pick up pizza. As we’re driving back, she calls to see where we’re at because in her mind it shouldn’t have taken that long. I don’t think she trusts him. She’s also forced him to change where he does his hobbies. He likes to play pool, but he can’t go to his favorite pool hall 30 minutes away. He has to go to the one 7 minutes away and be home by 9:30 pm.

Friend B: His wife never checks on him. Every time we hang out, his wife never calls or texts. For instance, the other day, he told her that he was going to play basketball with me from 8:30 to 12. He only lives 10 minutes from the court. After basketball, we went to get protein shakes and chatted until 1. A complete contrast from my other friend. He said that if he’s out late, she’ll just go to sleep and hear what he has to say in the morning. She trusts him completely.

I like Friend B’s marriage, however I wouldn’t mind a little text after let’s say 30 minutes of when I was going to be done to see what’s up. I could not do Friend A’s wife’s excessive calling.

What kind of partner would you rather have?

I am turning 30 next week. I am newly engaged as of July. We are each other's very first serious relationship. We met on New Years Eve on December 31, 2023. Like me, she also has a birthday this month. She will turn 27.

I most certainly love her, although I wish we could have met when we were both younger or had some connection in our youth of some sorts. I am her very first kiss after all, but a part of me feels sad that we missed that youth component with each other.

She had minimal dating experience in high school, but obviously it wasn't anything significant considering I am her first kiss.

I feel like overall, I will have that lingering regret of not experiencing young love/romance when I was younger.

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