My views on Feminism...

[takemetodecember]

I view myself as a feminist because it means equal rights for both men and women, right? Well you would understand my confusion when my classmates, both female and male, said they were not feminists.

After thinking about this, I thought the main reasons why they don't like to be called one is because it is associated with the 'angry ranting, unshaven woman' generalisation. However, these types of people only make up small portions of feminists (and the human race). Secondly, I think many of the issues feminsts in countries like mine (England) argue about e.g. expectations to cook are what some girls would like to do. Some females do want to cook for her partner all the time, or stay at home and look after the kids. This is fine, as long as you want to do it, go ahead! But this does not mean you are not a feminist. This just means you aren't in a position where expectations are not being forced upon you, you can still support other women who do not have this chance. There are numerous reasons why a man may not want to be labelled as a feminist, but sadly I am not too educated in this area so I would love to know in the comments reasons why :)

The main reason why I speak passionately about feminism is not because of the catcalls we recieve unnecessairly on the streets, or the kitchen jokes (although these are completely wrong and offensive). I am an active feminst because women in 'less developed' countries are being raped, beaten and deprived of careers. In fact, I recently read an article about many Bangladeshi and Pakistani being acid victims due to refusing arranged marriages. Yes. Women of the 21st century are being acid attacked, resulting in their face being disfigured even after intensive surgery.

I also watched a documentery a month or so ago about an Indian girl who was violently raped and beaten because she was with alone with a boy at night. This apparently wasn't how women were supposed to behave. It was heartbreaking to watch as she was a med-student, apsiring to be a doctor to help her family live a decent life.

Now to my second point, today I read something Shailene Woodley said about feminsim and it really struck me:

"My biggest thing is really sisterhood more than feminism. I don’t know how we as women expect men to respect us because we don’t even seem to respect each other. There’s so much jealousy, so much comparison and envy. And 'This girl did this to me and that girl did that to me.' And it’s just so silly and heartbreaking in a way."

I realised how true this is. I have experienced many circumstances where girls have gossiped about a girl being a 'slut/whore' because she is wearing clothing which are revealing. Also people who I thougth were my friends have brought me down and 'chosen' their crush over me. I hardly see this happening with guys. Now don't get me wrong; I think females do share a strong bond, but it is usually between their family or best friends, however males seem to have a universal repsect for one another.

So what do I hope people learn from this?

• Don't bring someone down and call them an offensive term e.g. slut, manwhore


• Respect one another and see things from their perspective before you judge


• Give feminism a good name and join causes that help people who are having their human rights taken away

If I have offended anyone in any way, I am truly sorry. I would love to hear your response to this, whether you agree or disagree and reaons why. Knowledge is power guys, I may be completely wrong so sharing your view may let me see things in a new light!

[Doofey]

I wouldn't be bothered by people saying they aren't feminists. To be honest its kind of a label since many feminists have completely different views. People who don't call themselves feminists don't neccessarily believe that genders shouldn't be equal, they just don't agree with some or many feminists in their campaigns.

I think feminists are given a bad name by the words and actions of some. Some of the most radical feminists are the most vocal, especially on the internet and so I think many people associate them with the entire group.

As far as feminists go I think people have a problem with the following:

1. Some feminists use strong language that judge men as a whole rather than the men who are the problem. They find it hypocritical that feminists argue against sterotypes but refer to men as a whole for issues such as rape and abuse. "Men are being taught to be aggressive with toxic masculinity," etc. Persobally I don't like being grouped with rapists just for being a male. No one likes to be labeled as a "possible rapist".

2. Some feminists trivialize problems men have and act like women are the only ones who have issues. No single group has everything going for them.

3. Generally speaking many things have become women's issues when they don't neccessarily need to be. While women are the majority of rape vicitims, pretending it doesn't happen to men, especially in prison, makes some men believe feminists only care about when women are the victims.

4. Some people are critical that many feminists in first world countries focus on problems here rather than in other countries like you mentioned that have much dire situations and need more help. I think countries where women are stoned, are treated like property, and have no rights should have more priority than men spreading their legs to wide on subways for banning the word "bossy".

5. Some feminists have made use of false statistics and dishonest tactics to support theor position. Using bogus studies like 1 in 3 college men would rape a woman if they could get away with it is not particularly wise. Many people find things like that incredible insulting and it hurts any credible claims other femibsts present. Others are annoyed when feminists use the notion of privilege to dismiss others opinions rather than logically dismantling them. Using ancedotal evidence is also a problem because it forces someone who disagrees to either dismiss their life experience if their mind isn't immediately changed

[Northeast106]

@Doofey Nicely stated.

[takemetodecember]

I completely agree with you, all these problems are from an endless cycle of generalisations from both genders. I also find it annoying when people complain about a topic and do nothing about it, it only irritates others and doesn't solve the issue. However, I've never experienced a feminist making up false statistics like that :/
I think there is gender 'hate' because people find it difficult to sympathise with something they haven't experienced personally.

[BehindTheFront]

I totally agree on the fact that we mistaken feminists and faminazis.
I can't disagree on women being nasty to each other while men have this universal bond. Yet I belong to the women that call other women slut or so. I mean, I've seen girls, young women and women behaving like they want to get every male's approval and desire whether these males are in a relationship or not ; that kind of behaviour is sick and it's not being ununited that pointing that out and trying to make it change. These girls mess up with others but especially with themselves, not making them understand would be a mistake.

Thanks for that article.

[Delerium92]

+++++

[takemetodecember]

You're welcome :)
However, I think it is wrong to call people sluts/whores because I know people that you have described and some are genuinely nice people who do not deserve the hate they get. I don't know, I don't like to judge people that I hardly know or don't know what they've been through

[BehindTheFront]

You're absolutely right. You seem like a kind and reliable girl, keep it that way :)

[FakeName123]

I am not a feminist for a bazillion of reasons. Let's go for the key reasons though:

- Men and women are different. Period. And they are different for a good reason.
- Actions speak louder than words. So I don't give a single f*ck about the definition of it.
- Self-Responsibility is worth more than wallowing in self-pity and victimhood
- A life is worth more than bodily autonomy which is why I am pro-life
- Feminism is like the boy who cries wolf with its constant overuse of the common buzzwords like rape, abuse, misogyny and such which results in invalidating actual victims
- When you have a scale and you keep putting weight only on one side, the scale will becoming imbalanced.
- Feminism wants regulary censorship at every opportunity
- Feminism is using the excuse of "rotten apples" or "no true scotsman" against the radfems instead of actually working against them to make their movement more valid
- Feminism thinks women deserve respect. No one deserve respect - you earn it.
- While Feminism says it is for equality, I have yet to see instances of the decades of Feminism where there were some actual actions taken to help men, except for 3-4 occasions.
- Feminism is advocating a hedonistic lifestyle.
- Feminism operates as an authoritarian movement. It's an "either you are for or against us"-mentality. If you don't agree with only a small aspect of it, you are already against it. Almost like a cult.
- Feminism using wrong statistics either out of sheer stupidity or due to conscious manipulation through lies.
- Feminism rarely uses factual evidence and much rather goes for anecdotal evidence
- Feminism tries to manipulate and guilt me into being one of them.
- What happens in some countries doesn't validate the need for feminism in the west.
- Wage Gap has been debunked a bazillion times.
- Rape Culture has been debunked a bazillion times.
- Feminists are hypocrites.
- While Feminism has a few valid observations, they regulary take the wrong conclusions out of it.
- Most feminists are mentally instable at best and abusive, manipulative human beings at worst.

inb4 you oppressive, misogynistic, abusive rapist.

[FakeName123]

And most important: Men and women are meant to love, care and complement each other - not to fight and compete.

[Mossup]

It is a very well worn argument that in the west the war has been won - Britain and Canada have an official old girl network and matriarchy controlling much of our political agenda and higher education and nutrition and medicine. America has a lot of issues as do many countries. Pakistan for the most part is very developed and progressive and extremely respectful of women after decades of feminism. We need a new paradigm. Egalitarianism. Women have different needs to men but why is it that our laws in the UK especially find in favour of women over men? Women initiate most domestic abuse situations but men get put behind bars for retaliating, because it''s who FINISHES a fight that the Police are obliged too deal with.
Since the 60s our education system, law courts, Police, charities, and industries have favoured women over men. This needs to be looked at. Our supermarkets are full of foods that are really BAD for the male digestive system but good for most women yet most nutritionists are women and only ever look at female nutrition/health needs. If we lived in a patriarchy then soya products would be more clearly labelled or even banned.
Soya is useful for women but really bad for men.
Christina Hoff Sommers is one of the most respectable academics writing feminist theory and indeed working on practical applications for the betterment of society but she is called an anti feminist because of her book "The War on Boys" - This is a major reason why people eschew the feminist label too.

[takemetodecember]

I agree that favouring women in laws should be changed so their is a fair system. Some people have told me they think a man shouldn't beat up a women because they are often stronger, however I think if violence occurs between a man and woman, whoever used physical violence should be charged. I guess epople favour women because they are thought as weaker and more defenceless, which is certainly not the case if they also used violence. However, I do not agree with your point about soya. I do not think this is a form of discrimination on males. Athough I'm not too sure how much damages it does to males, I think even if it affected females they would still sell it as much because soya is essential for good health. But then again, I don't know much about this so I could be wrong.

[NateInAk]

There are several reasons I don't identify as a "feminist." If the feminist movement was all about what you list here, I would, but I don't, and here's why.
The term "feminist" and "feminism" has been hijacked by women who don't give a solitary care to everything feminism should be doing that you've listed here. The feminist movement has come to mean things that many people want nothing to do with, and has lead to many wrongs and several false beliefs about men and society in general.
It is somewhat similar to neo-confederate libertarians latching on to the Republican Party which helps perpetuate the myth that Republican is synonymous with racist, but the feminist movement has been infiltrated much more thoroughly.
Doofey stated that feminists are given a bad rap because of a few radicals who cause problems all of feminism is blamed for, but these radicals are the most influential, vocal and powerful members of the movement.
For me to identify as a feminist, the movement would have to be brought to roots like you talk about in your take.
I choose not to call myself a feminist because I do not want to give any credence to feminism AS IT STANDS.

[crayven]

The definition of communism is very nice also.
Yet we don't see that working too well, right?

But hey, the DEFINITION is nice, right? Why isn't anyone a communist?1111

The biggest problem i have with feminism is LACK OF ACCOUNTABILITY.

"Women should be free to choose their own path"

True.

Women should also know that each "path" will have CONSEQUENCES.
Let yourself go and eat like a porker and you will be treated like a porker and no guy will touch you.
Consequences.
Instead NO!
We got this "fat acceptance" crapolla !

And this is just the tip.
Women forget that respect among men is EARNED not given by default.
We are not obligated to "respect women" , you are equal, you no longer are 'special' anymore.
You are a "man" with a vagina. That's it.

And it seems most women and feminists don't like to be treated like a man.
So instead of accepting that and going back to the old roles they - in typical fascist feminist fashion try to FORCE EVERYONE ELSE to change their thinking to fit theirs.
This is some orwellian stuff right here.

"Sweden bans men peeing while standing because women can't do it and it would oppress them"
( go ahead google this shit i'll wait )

And Sweden is to feminism what the USSR was to communism.
The "utopia" of feminism.

[crayven]

And don't get me started:

"Don't bring someone down and call them an offensive term e. g. slut, manwhore"

Do you know the most COMMON used insult against a man used by women?
VIRGIN loser. What was that about slut shaming again?

"Respect one another and see things from their perspective before you judge"

You aren't ENTITLED to respect. You EARN respect.

"Give feminism a good name "

I rather ROT than do that. If you want to campaign for rights of women in the third world, sure. go for it. Fully supported.

But don't even THINK that being hit-on in an elevator is "rape" ! ( google it if you don't know what i am talking about )

[Anonymous]

Heterosexual women are the worst. So much hate they have towards other women, it's so unbelievable. I love women, really really love women and have a strong dislike for women who bash other women, women that are jealous of other women, women that cater to men, etc. I have a stronger dislike for women who hate other women than for men who hate women. It's one thing to have the opposite sex to hate on you but your own kind.. pff.. unbelievable how some women can be.

I do identify myself as feminist but also a humanist! And I will continue to identify myself this way even if I'm being shamed for it by the online American anti-feminist movement. I don't care about the radicals in feminism, they're just that radicals, extremists and I don't connect their views to feminism as they don't fit feminism and humanism. Those few are just man hating women who put the feminst laabel on them even if they know that's not what feminism is about. A feminist doesn't talk about how terrible men are, but how important it is for all of us to have the same opportunities, same chances, same rights, etc.
The bashing of men is anti-feminism!

[Anonymous]

I am NOT a feminist, because I believe in equality... actual equality.
I agree with helping women with the negative issue they face in eastern cultures, but feminism does NOT fight for equality. It does everything it can to stifle or suppress men's issues. So regardless of what they tell you, feminism is not for equality. If supports women's issues only. Women here in the west are NOT oppressed. Feminism here is a bullying, hate filled, suppression group.
If you want to give feminism a good name... you need to speak up AGAINST the horrible things feminism constantly does to men trying to fight for their issues, and women who don't agree with their ideology. You need to unmask the LIES and false statistics they perpetuate about wage gap, rape culture, domestic violence, etc.

If you truly want feminism to have a good name again, you need to work from the inside out. Rid the group of it's massive poisoned core.

[genuinlysensitive]

Agree 100%! It does NOT fight for equality but sexism. Just because that happens to be against a different group than women does NOT make it any less sexism!

That "massive poisoned core" is feminism, it always has been. It is just recent years we have begun to see it.

[Anonymous]

I only come to tell you what it means not to bash it in any way so if I sound angry I am not I am just confused how people get the 2 mixed up. FEMinism is where Woman get equal rights BUT double standards FAVORING them are not gone which isn't equal to guys. EQUALism is where everyone is equal in rights and there are NO double standards favoring anyone. Girl can ask out a guy, girl can pay for a date, etc. that is EQUALism. the reason FEMinism is called that is because it favors woman.

[takemetodecember]

that might be your view of the definition but the actual definition is : the advocacy of women's rights on the ground of the equality of the sexes (according to google)
I don't think the original cause of feminism is double standards but a minority of feminist turn it into this way. I think feminism is encouraging equalism, in my opinion it is another form of it but it is called FEMinism because globally women have fewer rights and respect. I don't know if that makes sense?

[Opinion Owner]

its equality in their control but u can't control double standards so in all its not equal. but yes I guess it does make sense.

[DarkHumorRUs]

I don't understand why you'd write something like this and make it so much from your own perspective. Like, why don't you write an article without using "I think" and "In my opinion"... it would sound a lot more credible. How credible can some random chick on this website be?

[lumos]

This isn't a traditional article, it's a myTake. myTakes are very versatile. You're allowed to express your own opinion and kind of turn it into a causerie. You're also allowed to be more factual/objective, and provide readers with statistics etc. It's literally a platform where you can get your voice heard. Anyone can write about anything.

[genuinlysensitive]

Because the OP is trying to pass off her personal views as fact that is why! When facts fail spin artists try and use any other means to try and convince people they are right.

[DarkHumorRUs]

But obviously she didn't use the "dont use personal pronouns" method.

[martyfellow]

Most current feminists are just hustlers, using female solidarity to advance themselves in their work or in the media, but couldn't care less about anyone but themselves really. Often they are interested only in the handful of wealthy and influential men, so find it natural to ignore, belittle, and put down everyone else.

[Longblackveil]

yes! so do your work over there, where feminism is needed. Not here in the US or the rest of the western world. Over here, feminist ran out of real problems to solve, so they just make up grievances like wage gap and cat calls. Feminists did a great job in years past, were all grateful, thank you, now go away :)

[Noxifer626]

I agree with you.
I suppose men don't want to be labeled as feminists for the same reason women don't want to, because of that "unshaven ranting bitch" archetype.

[takemetodecember]

yeah, that stereotype definitely needs to go

[Bonnie12I27I12]

i think feminists should deal with the ladies first. they treat each other like crap. get the ladies to treat each other equally then the men.

[GirlScoutsRevenge]

Totally agree, women are the real enemy of female equality.

[couldntthinkofaname]

I agree, I think many women have twisted the meaning of feminism and take advantage of being the "oppressed gender". That is why when I get asked if I'm a feminist is say no but I believe in equal rights for both genders.

[JulyAndrews]

So a Muslim should stop calling himself or herself muslim just because of some religious nuts they have among them? So sad to let yourself be bullied into not calling yourself a feminist because of the few crazy radicals that get way too much attention (just like how the radical muslims get so much attention eventhough the majority of Muslims are not radical)

[couldntthinkofaname]

I'm not being bullied out of something, I just don't want to associate myself with the extremes.

Islam is a religion, feminism isn't, and I can't speak for Muslims but I'm a Christian and if there were Christian extremists I wouldn't abandon being called one and leave the 'name' for the extremists. I would simply clarify to people that I believe what they are doing is wrong.

But anyway, 'feminism' is about the actions you do and the message you prtray, what you call yourself isn't important to me

[thatkaruguy]

you have a basket of apples. this particular basket is the redapplist basket. 10 of these ables are bad 6 on the top and three on the middle and bottom. would you want to be assosciated with this basket of apples? no its the same thing with feminism.

[jackaquack]

The only problem is the LARGE amount of feminists who take their stance past the definition. They see men as dumb and deceiving, and they should be in control.

[Anonymous]

The reason so many people say they are not feminists is despite definitions, feminists are NOT for equality. Yes like you they prattle on about the definitions and deflect criticism that their movement only cares about helping women and hurting men.

[Theguyoverthere]

No. Just plain no.

https://youtu.be/iARHCxAMAO

[Theguyoverthere]

If that link don't work check this one.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=iARHCxAMAO0

[Anonymous]

You wrote this take still read it again you said feminism means supporting the equality for both the genders male and female but all of your points on girls not guy.
It shows everything

[takemetodecember]

That's because all my points are based from experience and what I have thought/ heard others say/ media. I honestly think we should be more aware of discrimination on males, but there is little to no media attention on that so I am not very educated in those issues...

[Opinion Owner]

Ok, I will you something now.
Girls rapes guys but no one take it serious, girls don't approach guys as much as guys do. majority of the girls don't pay for dates at least first three dates because to play a safe games.

[Opinion Owner]

I have seen in many cases if a girl beat every one laughs but if a guy heated a girl then he will be sent to the jail

[Opinion Owner]

I have seen an online article that two girls made a video of naked guy who is bathroom but everyone said it. Is fun but if it happened to girl he will be sent to the jail

[Opinion Owner]

Divorce law helps woman more then man and a girl can give birth to her child withouth her man permission but he have to pay to the kid so that is working as a free pass for woman

[Anonymous]

Nothing wrong with feminism, hell I'm a feminist, but, it's the feminazis that I don't like. There's a fine line between the two, just don't step over it

[Anonymous]

Oh don't I love seeing pics of ugly people? Damn.
I wonder if they ever think their lives could have been better if they simply had said yes to their pathetic arranged marriages.

[couldntthinkofaname]

You must be depressed to say something as horrible as that anon

[Opinion Owner]

Quite the contrary.