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Fat vs. Curvy – DOESN’T MATTER

RJGraveyTrain

I am tired of self-righteous people making take after take about who is allowed to call themselves curvy and who is not. Any time I try to read takes about body positivity, and a lot of what I see is girls defending one body type and bashing another. The most popular one seems to be differentiating between fat and curvy. I didn’t realize that we lived in a world where we had the assumed right to tell people what they are and aren’t allowed to label themselves.

Fat vs. Curvy – DOESN’T MATTER

First and foremost, I want to know why it matters. If they want to call themselves curvy, who does it hurt? And where in the dictionary does it say that curvy is defined solely by a woman of one specific body type? Last I checked, the definition of curvy was a continuously bending line without edges. And guess what? Curves can curve outwards, inwards, upwards, and downwards and they can curve in all of those directions at once. Rolls are a curve, fingers have curves, your arms have curves – it’s all a curve. I’m 5’2” and a 115 lbs and I still have curves; I have a friend who is 6’2” and over 200 lbs and she has curves too. They’re all curves. There’s no exclusive rights to the curve.

It seems to me that it’s all about competing; who has the best, ideal body and who gets to wear the most currently desired label. So, instead of bringing each other up and encouraging everyone to feel good about themselves, we’ll assign ourselves exclusive rights to the title of dictator of the body brigade and begin making decisions on who can feel what about themselves.

I get it: people don’t want to associate the word curvy with what they deem as unhealthy. But here’s the kicker: someone else’s health is not your business nor is it your responsibility, not to mention you have NO CLUE what their health is. I know many plus sized people personally who are far healthier than you would assume given their weight.

I guess I just don’t get the whole “if we show people plus sized individuals who are happy with themselves it will encourage them to be fat.” No, it won’t, not if they have the proper knowledge about health in the first place. These people aren’t telling you to go out and eat a burger, they’re saying: “Hey, I’m bigger and I don’t hate myself.” That’s no more ridiculous than saying if we have transsexual actors our kids are all going to become transsexual. Teach and parent instead of relying on the media to tell people what’s right, perhaps?

Sorry for such an angry take for today, but this topic really got me going today and I’m tired of people putting each other down over something as trivial as body shape. How about we concern ourselves with our own bodies and our own health instead of worrying about others who didn’t ask for our opinions?

Have a good weekend and to my Canadian friends, happy Thanksgiving!

Fat vs. Curvy – DOESN’T MATTER
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Most Helpful Girl

  • CHARismatic110
    And this is why you're cool as hell in my book. I'm so very sick of this argument. People just don't get it. I'm not sure if they don't understand or don't want to understand. I got shamed into not referring to myself as curvy when I first joined this site. Then I realized that nobody has the right to tell me what can and cannot refer to myself as.

    What bothers me the most are the females that are so nasty about this subject. It's like how can you as a female, put another female down for the way she looks. This debate has done nothing but drive the wedge further between women. It's really sad. And it makes me really angry.
    LikeDisagree 9 People
    Is this still revelant?
    • Thanks boo. I'm sorry people have been so shitty to you.

    • You're welcome love, and thank you. It's nice to see someone else that understands.

    • No problem - I do my best.

    • Show All

Most Helpful Guy

  • Watermelonoma
    people can label themselves what they want. At the end of the day though, im not going to label someone in my head as curvy when i personally think they are just fat. This all kind of reminds me of the woman recently working for the NAACP or w/e (i forget her name) who labelled herself as black when she was clearly white. I mean, sure... you can label yourself what you will... but in my mind (and many others she will always be white. Same sort of thing applies in this case
    Like 8 People
    Is this still revelant?

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What Girls & Guys Said

1523
  • Mekkalyn
    "I guess I just don’t get the whole “if we show people plus sized individuals who are happy with themselves it will encourage them to be fat.” No, it won’t, not if they have the proper knowledge about health in the first place. These people aren’t telling you to go out and eat a burger, they’re saying: “Hey, I’m bigger and I don’t hate myself.” That’s no more ridiculous than saying if we have transsexual actors our kids are all going to become transsexual. Teach and parent instead of relying on the media to tell people what’s right, perhaps?"

    Couldn't say it better myself.
    This is how I feel completely.
    It's ridiculous to tell someone they don't have a right to feel good about themselves because they aren't what society deems beautiful. EVERYONE deserves to feel good about themselves. Just because you like to eat fatty food doesn't mean you deserve to be hated or made fun of. And it isn't fair to make fun of someone on the opposite spectrum.

    Everyone should be happy with themselves
    Like 1 Person
  • MattXRT
    Yes you're right it doesn't matter. Your body, your life, your choice.
    People CAN label themselves whatever they want BUT that doesn't mean everyone will have to agree with them.
    Choice you see is what differentiates us as humans, everyone has the right to their own opinions and everyone also has the right to disagree with them.
    Like 2 People
    • I understand what you mean. I just don't agree with people attacking one another over something so silly like calling yourself curvy.

  • CrimsonKing
    Actually we DO have the right to tell people what they are and what we label them. It's called freedom of speech. I think Bush Jr. was a horrible president and looked kinda like a monkey. I can say that. Nobody cares.

    So if people want to define curvy a certain way they can, be them the accuser or the defender.

    And from my perspective I like fat and curvy girls. I have no ideal.

    It's Thanksgiving in Canada?
    LikeDisagree 4 People
    • Also the other guy made a good point. Defining what is or isn't curvy is important in the fashion world. It determines what sizes fit where. So it's not like it's completely unimportant, because it is in certain settings.

    • What point does it cross into the boundaries of inappropriateness then? Because we say that we shouldn't allow bullying to occur or harassment (and each of these things can specifically target the physical appearance) yet we allow fat-shaming to occur because we preach freedom of speech. There is freedom of speech and then there is attacking somebody unnecessarily for something that they themselves have the right to do. If you have the right to tell somebody that they aren't curvy and they're fat and disgusting, that person has the equal right to call themselves curvy.

    • Also yes Thanksgiving is coming up here in Canada.

    • Show All
  • iamyourneighbor
    I'm tired of these mytakes about body shaming. It's getting annoying and this argument has been said over and over again. The same old argument that no one has the right to tell someone what to call themselves. Someone made a mytake with this exact same argument. No offense but Can't you come up with something more original? I read a mytake like this before
    Disagree 4 People
    • You still read it, so apparently it was original enough for you to spend your precious time not only finishing it, but thinking up a response to it and adding to the numbers so more people can see it.

      Are you always this smart?

  • Kay211
    Yup. Keep seeing girls posting "YOU'RE NOT CURVY, I AM" like a child that doesn't want to share their toys lol

    Seems people really get off on telling other people about their bodies, like they know it better than they do.
    LikeDisagree 4 People
  • RationalMale
    Problem is simple.

    Fat people don't like how being fat makes life harder, such as not being able to walk or run up stairs, or increased medical bills, or how being fat makes you sexually unattractive.

    Fat people, particularly fat women, then launch hissy fits claiming they are beautiful and the media is what makes men like slim women.

    Hence, problem.

    And being overweight also makes your risk of cancer, heart disease, and stroke skyrocket... so, it's not trivial.
    LikeDisagree 8 People
    • Mekkalyn

      lmao, you clearly are talking about morbidly obese people that are hundreds overweight... "fat" or overweight people CAN run/walk up stairs and most don't have increased medical bills, and sexual attraction is subjective so you can't speak for everyone (there are a lot of guys that like bigger women). You can't just physical health by weight alone. There are a lot of variables and your genes play a huge role.

      being overweight certainly does increase your chance of a heart disease and stroke, but I have never heard the claim about increasing your risk of cancer... although, pretty much everything you do nowadays increases your risk of cancer, so I wouldn't be exceptionally surprised. However, you can get all of those problems without being heavy, and there are a lot of people that have been heavy their own life and never develop any of those problems.

      There's a lot of grey area. You can't speak in such a definitive matter on this subject because it's not true for a huge group.

  • BellePepper
    YES. YES. YES. It makes me so annoyed! Like we're supposed to be able to call people fat because "that's what they are" but we can't call them curvy even though that's what they actually are? UMMMMMM

    I agree that it's another form of elitism. Like heavier people are NOT allowed any positive words for themselves in case they stop feeling like the horrible disgusting slobs they are? Seriously this type of Awful needs to stop.
    Like 1 Person
  • TheDevilInside
    Yes!!! People should just stop bullying others with the pretense of "I just want you to be healthy". That's fine if you say that to someone you love. But then again, you wouldn't say mean things to someone you genuinely care about. And chances are, that stranger you've called fat and bullied? You don't fucking give a shit about their health. You are just so fucking happy to have someone to belittle so your sad pathetic self can have something to feel better about.
    Like 2 People
  • RainbowFanGirl
    Thank you for this take, I'm so sick of those takes about "fat vs curvy". How the heck do tell someone what they can and can NOT call themselves?

    People can call themselves whatever they want. You can refer to yourself as whatever you want.
    Like 4 People
  • PublicEnemyNumber-1
    No, it does mtter. Labels exist for a reason. If labels didn't exist, we wouldn't know what to call each other. We wouldn't have names. We would have to be very specific when referring to everything, and that's just a burden. Instead of saying "I'm fat." you would say, "I've got a slightly chubby stomach, but my top half isn't necessarily fat."
    LikeDisagree 10 People
  • DarkHumorRUs
    But... no.
    The term "curvy" means they have a small waist compared to their hips. It's basically a fucking hourglass or pear shape bone structure.
    LikeDisagree 8 People
  • allahu_snackbar
    hahaa

    s2.quickmeme.com/.../...5a01b94a59298dca50fbeb.jpg

    If you're fat and you call yourself curvy it's bullshitting, nobody likes bullshitters.
    Like 2 People
  • fauchelevent
    After seeing the other myTake put up today, it was really nice to see this one :)
    LikeDisagree 3 People
  • meatballs21
    Why do you want to apply a misleading label to yourself? That's a big part of it. I'm sure you've seen tales of online dating sites where you select body types, and some people set out to deliberately mislead you. I've had it happen to me: A girl who carefully chose flattering pictures and put 'a few pounds extra' turned out to actually weigh twice what a girl her height should.

    Relatedly, 'curvy' was already a term for a certain body type that has been misappropriated and applied seemingly with intent to deceive, either the user themselves or those around them. If they'd come up with a new term specifically for their body type (BBW I guess is seen as pejorative) then there wouldn't be this argument.
    Like 3 People
    • If you have eyes, how is it misleading? If you can't take the time to properly look at somebody and get to know their body type then that's on you. Either way, I don't see how being overweight means you can't call yourself "curvy." Rolls are still curves. Curve is just a noun, it isn't a singular body type.

    • Then again, taking a second look at it - maybe I can see what you mean. I guess I'm biased because I can recognize a flattering angle and maybe other people can't? I still don't see how an angle can so dramatically hide someone's shape but nonetheless I still don't think that means that people shouldn't be allowed to call themselves curvy, because to me curvy comes in more forms than one.

    • You're arguing semantics. 'Curvy' was already established as descriptive for a specific body type, trying to drag it back to the dictionary and reapply to a much broader (no pun or insult intended) range is missing the point.

      There is already extensive discussion on the internet regarding flattering angles and some of them are quite cunning and convincing. Likewise, techniques for seeing through them (such as looking for the collarbone).

      You can label yourself however you want, but it doesn't make it true. It also doesn't work if the label is so incongruous that people don't understand.

      Happy Thanksgiving, by the way!

    • Show All
  • Jager66
    People don't like it when a fat person uses the term curvy to describe them self because it's deceptive. Not hard to understand.
    Like 6 People
    • ras144

      How is it deceptive? Unless she's shaped like a straight line, ALL women have curves. If you don't like her body type, that's YOUR problem, not hers. In fact, men also have curves.

    • Jager66

      Now you're just playing semantics games,
      Fat =/= Curvy.
      Fat = Fat.

      If I don't like fat women that is not a problem for me it is my preference, a very simple one where I choose not to pursue women I am not attracted to for any reason, including being fat. I fail to see how this is a problem for me?

    • Mekkalyn

      I fail to see how it's a problem that a "fat" woman uses the term "curvy".
      You have eyes. You can use them. If you don't think the term applies to her, don't use it for her. If you don't like the way she looks, don't go after her. You don't have to make a big deal out of it or shame them for it.

      There is a grey area for the word "curvy" just based on its definition. Everyone can take their own meaning out of it, I suppose, but based on definition technically everyone is curvy to some extent.

  • burlen
    Without a doubt, one of the best illuminating write ups I have come across on this platform. Very refreshing and insightful. Thank you for cleaning out the mess for us.
    LikeDisagree 3 People
  • coconutelixir
    Love it... great take, I agree. It was bugging me too, but I'm too lazy to put it into something so well-said as this.
    Like 2 People
  • TheBasil
    Agree. With everything there.

    Skinny people should feel good about themselves. Overweight people should feel good about themselves. Assholes should just keep their mouth shut.

    Everyone no matter which size should be allowed to feel beautiful
  • oddwaffle
    People don't generally hate themselves. It's the thought that other people don't like them is the problem. People are entitled to their opinions. However, we are extremely reactive to opinions about ourselves. So much that we believe we know what other are talking about ourselves.
  • AdamThomas
    It matters because people are lying about what they are. This idea that you can call yourself whatever you want regardless of whether or not you actually are because feelings is stupid. As for the idea that encouraging people to be okay with being overweight won't make more people feel okay with being overweight, again that's ridiculous. I don't condone bullying of overweight people, but celebrating it is a terrible idea too. Why would an overweight person try to lose weight when everyone tells them that it's great? Why don't we instead of complaining about "body shaming" encourage people to be healthy and do something about it? I've seen plenty of overweight people completely transform themselves.
    Disagree 3 People
    • I just think people should just be up front with their appearance regardless of what their weight, height, etc are because if you're up front then the person who agrees to go on a date with you is attracted to you physically and they can't complain about misleading pictures.

    • AdamThomas

      @bloodmoungain1990 - exactly. I'm 5'3". I could come up with silly arguments that I'm tall compared to a child or a midget so therefore should have the "right" to call myself tall, and complain about anyone who says otherwise - or I can just be honest and say I'm short and deal with it. At least weight is something that can be changed, I'll always be short lol.

    • Show All
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