Many foreigners have been asking questions about America and assuming things about us. I am getting tired of this so I thought I would clear the air.
Truth #1: We are all a bunch of fat people who eat fast food
Yep, there are absolutely no fit Americans. The ones that you see that are fit are robots.
Jillian Michaels is a robot. Even now as I write this in my 'merican home, I am eating pizza, cake, and donut's because My 'merican blood will not eat allow me to eat vegetables.
Truth #2: All Americans mistreat Native Americans.
We know this is true because we no that the British never came here ever and colonized nothing. The Europeans never killed or mistreated the Native Americans ever.
We all know that British commander Jeffery Amherst never suggested using biological warfare against the Native Americans as a weapon.
Truth #3: All Americans hang out at Walmart.
Dang! You got us again! There really is no where else for us to go because America does not have Las Vegas, Disney World, Hollywood, Times Square, Rockefeller Plaza.
Truth #4: We all party at colleges a lot and join Greek just like on TV.
It''s true, we drink alcohol all day and we do not take college seriously. Everything on TV with actors is true.
Truth #5: We are extremely patriotic:
I'm sorry I can't type well with this eagle flying over my head and my big ass American flag waving in my face. Nobody in America has ever done an anti American protest ever. Also, nobody hates America.
Truth #6: We are all uneducated:
Ugh, Americans speak American not English, in our schools we learned that the reason why the majority of Americans speak American is because a 'Merica dinosaur came and helped us during the revolutionary war. Who the fuck is England?
Truth #7 We all carry guns:
I eat cereal with my gun and I use my gun as a loofah for when I am taking a shower singing about freedom.
Okay, You Got Us! 7 Harsh Truths About Americans (Satire)
You are betraying my main man 'Murica by giving away all our secrets! I'm pretty sure the constitution states that we are supposed to get angry and defend ourselves by calling our country better than theirs. 😱
Watch out-- our cops may be coming for you, and they shoot literally everyone on sight, no questions asked of course. Why would we do all this? Because... Y'know, freedom isn't free amirite.
*alarm clock goes off with bald eagle noises to signal to get daily big mac order* Brb, better go ride my horse (since I'm in Texas) for my daily McDonalds and Walmart run. Hopefully y'all'll stay put 'till I'm back to get my daily dose of freedom propoganda.
Now before I begin I know this is satire but I have to answer this anyway just for the sake of it so don't take what I say personally.
1. Nope, we're quite fit where I live, everyone here are miners, factory workers, soldiers and farmers quite a healthy and strong bunch of people.
2. Another false thing, native American's were some of my best friends growing up and were well loved in our community, also another one was a great friend to my family and my father.
3. Another false, Walmart is rather empty actually, most people go hang out in the countryside or at a bar, or driving around. No one goes to Walmart to hang out.
4. Another false, no college parties around here, all the college students are actually pretty well behaved.
5. That is true.
6. Another false as shown evident by several people on here including myself
7. Another false actually quite a few states outright make it impossible to own guns legally, and even ban em. New York for instance makes it incredibly difficult.
Erm... I know this is an attempt at satire, but you do know that Americans ARE Europeans and British people don't you? You seem to be saying that Americans didn't attack the Native Americans... well of course they didn't, Americans didn't exist. They are Europeans and British people.
Nice. I traveled overseas during the Iraq war time (southeast asia). I told a few people I was Canadian to avoid anti American sentiment. In retrospect I'm very ashamed of that. I'm proud to be American.
I do blame Hollywood and our liberal mass media (that gets broadcast overseas) that makes us look so stupid. It gives foreigners a twisted sense of what we are all about.
Also if you don't like the USA (and you live here) you are welcome to get the fuck OUT. Now!
It seems the look that foreigners think or wen they think of American is a white person and I'm not white so I think I will be fine if I ever visit a different country because I have met foreigners in America who assumed I was not American either lmao
Am I the only one who got aroused by that using a gun as a loofah comment?
Either way, whenever Native Americans get brought up, I would retort with the British Empire's wholesale genocide of the Australian aborigines peoples.
You cut off the part of that family guy clip where he fires it into the air and says it was pretty cool. He also killed the super-devil with that gun in that episode...
lol you forgot one thing. Everything in America is massive. Big ass cars, big ass buildings, big ass roads, big ass fast food meal portions and big ass booties
Um that word is actually seen as offensive in America to people with special disabilities, you are talking about America long time ago who used that word
Let's see: I don't eat fast food I've never met a Native American I've never been to Walmart I've never been to a frat house I'm extremely patriotic I'm nowhere near uneducated I carry a gun almost everywhere I go Great take!
Holidays 
Girl's Behavior 
Guy's Behavior 
Flirting 
Dating 
Relationships 
Fashion & Beauty 
Health & Fitness 
Marriage & Weddings 
Shopping & Gifts 
Technology & Internet 
Break Up & Divorce 
Education & Career 
Entertainment & Arts 
Family & Friends 
Food & Beverage 
Hobbies & Leisure 
Other 
Religion & Spirituality 
Society & Politics 
Sports 
Travel 
Trending & News 
Most Helpful Opinions