I go through this scenario all the time. A lot of this has to boil down to Jealousy: because they can't believe how one can be happy without another person. Envy: because they wish they could be more like you. Especially when they're miserable in their own relationships. Misunderstanding: because they have no idea the things you go through when dealing with potential and non-potential suitors in this life. Confusion: because maybe they were taught that everybody has a 'soulmate' somewhere waiting for them. Of course, the very concept of soulmate's is a Greek myth and concept that people have literally over-spiritualized it into something very psychologically damaging. Pride: because they feel that you're beneath them. And it's their ego's along with it, due to thinking that you must be miserable and lonely all the time.
Not everybody is fit for relationships, let alone getting married. Besides this: 'you'll change your mind when the right person comes along' is very bogus. Love is a choice. To love is a choice. To get into a relationship with somebody is a choice. Therefore the answers should always be either Yes or No.
I hate this too! I would love to be in a relationship, but not everyone gets that chance unfortunately.
Most of my friends are married and have kids and I am single. I have people all the time asking me when I'm getting married. It makes me sad. I wish people could just support single people regardless of what is going on in their life. For some single people, it's hard. Some really struggle and could use the support rather than get blasted for not having a partner.
Especially now that the holidays are coming up, I find it becoming more of an issue for me. Since I know my family will be asking. Holiday parties are awkward too because I'm one of the few people who shows up alone. I have no one I can take to the party.
Usually because they have never been single long enough to experience the benefits of being single. It is the norm for them to continuously struggle to make a relationship work. Ironically, I used to have the same mindset as you before I met my current boyfriend. Now I realize that our relationship is good only because we both did not need someone in our lives to feel complete before we met. You may or may not meet someone. The important thing is that you enjoy life and dismiss people who make you feel less than you are. If you are comfortable where you are at then keep doing that and don't worry why other dissaprove of your life style.
I've been single all my life, but have dated, and no one has ever said to me you're single what's wrong with you? If they did then they can go fuck themselves. Having said that, I've heard some people who are serial daters/serial monogamists that say oh no, I'm gonna be single, I'm not used to it, my life's over. Those are the ones with the real issues as they are dependent on others for happiness.
One thing I do hate is when I tell some people about my experiences in dating or when I've been rebounded and they're like you haven't been in a relationship or you weren't in a relationship with that person, what does it matter? As if people like us don't have feelings.
Just ignore them. Misery loves company anyway. Don't believe in any of the bullshit they tell you or give you. Remind them that relationships aren't perfect at all and requires a lot of time, effort, patience, etc. Each to their own. If you want to have and be in a relationship, then go for it. If you want to be single and remain single, there's no problem with that either. Besides the other person cannot complete you and make you happy anyway, because happiness comes from within ourselves.
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I feel the exact same thing! as a matter of fact today I was discussing the topic of celibacy and how I viewed it as acceptable to me because of my lack of desire to get involved with someone, sadly it didn't go too well... most of them thought I was crazy 😕 I was hurt by them but nevertheless I was still consistent with my decision. It's normal for everybody to want to get married and get into relationships, so you objecting it causes others to think you're insane because everybody gets involved
I wouldn't call the majority of what you described as looking down on being single. There are a million technical studies that show companionship in a lasting relationship can improve health, mood, ability to cope with stress etc. because one has someone to relate too, and both share their life and burdens with. People in those types of happy relationships only want that for you too. It's like if they won two free cars, and only needed one, offering you the other one because they know it might make you happy. It is also hard to say you are happier being single if you haven't found someone like they describe. I'm not in any way doubting your happiness, it's just you can't also then knock what you don't yet have as a possibility for bringing to your life more happiness.
End of the day... do what you're doing. If you're happy, and you believe that to be true no matter if you are in or out of relationship, then that is the truth.
I personally don't but in cases like this question, it's hard not to pity or be irritated by someone who completely contradicts their 'point' with the side-jab about not wanting to be 'trapped in a relationship'.
Shitty deal that you've only ever been in relationships which made you feel that way but passive-aggressiveness should've been left in your teens.
Because misery loves company, so men that are stuck in relationshits want other men to join them in their misery.
And women HATE seeing a man free and enjoying himself. A woman MUST be getting some kind of utility out of him or he's not a 'real' man.
Because most subconsciously assume that the purpose of being alive is to form a family, and work to support them until you die. So someone who is getting older without a partner is seen by others as someone who is not completing their task/role as a human while they are on this planet. like you're not accomplishing the main thing/reason you were existed or made for.
Great question, one I've always thought about. People in relationships often have a snobby attitude and pride about it, and seem to think they're suddenly the world's best experts on love and having someone in their life. They also have the dumb idea that you should or need to date several people before you really ever gain any "experience" or understanding about relationships.
Sometimes being single shows a lot more than being in a bunch of relationships.
They obviously think they are in a better position than you. They're not, there are up and down sides for both being single and being in a replationship. Some t get divorced later, so remember the words about the "right woman" just in case.
But why do you even care?
People in relationships don't look down on single people. Single people are the last thing on other people's mind when they have a significant other. I've found single people are more relationship obsesses than anyone else.
because today , people think they are only truly worth something because they got the girl/guy of their dreams and therefore they like to laugh at the single person because they don't have anyone...
Never had that happen to me.
TBH, perhaps it depends on the group of people you hang out with.
Change your company if that's what they do
They think we want what they have while we just want to be left alone!
Anyway, they think that one of the most important purposes in life is mating.
Some of them can't handle being single so they feel they are higher than others just for having a significant other. And they struggle when they are not in a relationship.
I don't think they look down on others.. maybe they just pity them lol?
i know what you mean here... well try and don't pay attention
Yes it is patronising but I think it is mostly unintentional
Interesting, since I actually feel sorry for most of my male friends in relationships. They seem to shrink a bit, and seem to be less happy. They certainly are less fun to be around, with their constant complaining about how their lives have changed.
i think i might meet the guy of my dreams in the future
cuz they are missing a big part of their life... honestly i figured that part is just based on a story i imagined... relationship is resposibility.
Well, someone understands.
Do what i do. Ignore them.
Human nature. When people have something you don't they think their better than you.
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