Should society have more stay at home dads?

[MzAsh]

Video: www.instagram.com/.../?igshid=9ennp2u4w3vm

Also known as Gary Vee, a widely popular and successful business guru, is audaciously branching out into commentary on other societal subject matters.

Here, he’s talking about according to his experience, he believes gender norms are making men and women miserable and how stay at home parenting should be more balanced between men and women.

Thoughts?

[englisc]

I've seen that video.

I think that if that's what they want, they should be free to do it. I can understand wanting to remove the stigma there.

What I can't understand is this idea that it should be 50/50. That's the obsession these people have in all areas, bringing about a 50/50 outcome.

At first it was all about giving people freedom of choice, removing the barriers that stopped them from doing what they wanted to do. Now it seems that these people want to socially engineer and force a 50/50 outcome. It makes no sense to me.

I also kind of think that people make too much of a big deal out of it anyway. When my youngest son was about a year old, for a while I was a stay at home Dad because my girlfriend needed to work to finish this University course she was on. There was no law to stop me from doing so, so we did it. Some other people might have had negative opinions about it - I didn't give a shit. None of their business. There's no real barrier, the main problem is people giving too much of a shit about the opinions of people whose opinions don't even matter.

[ZeonWolf69]

I watch some of gary vees videos and listen to him. In this case he is only talking about the people that are miserable because of social norm.
If the female ultimately has the better drive for success in business while the male has a more compassionate and caring drive should be at home.
But ultimately it is whatever works best for that couple and in most cases the male is the one that brings home the more money and is more driven by the work they do.
I dont think it will ever be 50/50 but I do believe that the stigma of the stay at home parent should be the female should change.
If it worked out in my relationship I would be a stay home dad no problem. But unfortunately it doesn't work out that way and we both have to work 40 hour jobs ontop of being parents

[why_am_i_here]

The reason there are more stay at home moms than dads is because the mother is the one giving birth to the child. That child needs their mother to grow. Women are literally built to make and care for babies (tho they don't have to make one if they don't wanna). Once the child is old enough to not have to rely on their mother specifically but still needs to rely on a parent the father usually has their own steady job by now. Switching it up would be complicating. But if a mother chooses to get a job or already has one that can support her family I think it's great if a dad can take care of his kids and stay at home with them. There is the argument that men should be the providers but in my opinion that is between the husband and wife to decide. Whatever makes the family happiest is what should be accepted by society.

[lumos]

Yes, I believe it would be nice if more men did that. But I also understand that nowadays it's really difficult to support an entire family with just one source of income, so it definitely doesn't work for everyone.

I think this questions should also extend to maternity/paternity leave. I think in my country, moms typically go on maternity leave for about 6 months to a year, sometimes more if they feel like it (but most moms go back to work pretty soon). However, dads usually only take a couple of months off work, that's it. There should be more room for dads to go on longer paternity leaves.

[hahahmm]

Most women who get married want to marry up. The number of men interested in marriage has dropped and obviously the number of guys a career woman considers above her is more limited than if she had no career. This is a problem that stay at home dads won’t fix.

Women wanted more freedom but there’s consequences to that, especially since men & women don’t think alike contrary to feminist ideology.

I’m also not convinced that it’s healthy for kids to be raised by a single mom or a dominating/controlling mom which is likely the situation when dad stays at home. In my experience & observation this creates ball busting girls who only want weak men & feminine minded boys who are overly emotional and unable to be leaders.

[mistixs]

No. I can't get a link right now because I'm on my phone, but Bureau of Labor statistics indicated that most stay-at-home fathers don't actually do much housework, and it's all on the plate of the working mother to do when she gets home.
Unfortunately it seems like a lot of men won't get work done unless they're under the supervision of another man (typically in the workforce environment).
Also, even if stay-at-home fathers did pull their weight, men can't breastfeed for the recommended 2 years

[Dongtai]

A coworker told me I should be a stay at home dad and I didn’t even know that was a thing up until then. I’m not passionate about any hobbies or careers. But I’ve always been passionate about marriage/parenthood.

I would love to be a stay at home dad when the time comes. I could spend most of my free time teaching and raising my children. I always picture myself as a mentor, passing down my life wisdom to them when they’re young so they’ll be better than I ever was at each age of their lives. I sorta want to home school then until high school.

But money is important so I wouldn’t do it unless we had the extra cash for me not to be bringing in income.

[FakeName123]

Absolutely not. And I find it ridiculous how all these so called experts pretend that gender roles just came out of nowhere from a vacuum and are purely artifically created.

Newsflash: No, they are not. Instead they are an extension of the biological reality we are still bound to. The issue with gender roles is only if they become forced (see islamic countries for example) - but not that they exist per se. But gender roles per se aren't bad. In fact, gender roles are what even made it possible for our societies to strive and get where we are right now to begin with. Only in recent times - leeching off of the wealth that was created by generation (s) prior - some people try to question everything past generations did potentially wrong and thinking they can somehow create a new utopia by tearing everything prior down.

It's pure insanity.

[coachTanthony]

Gary Vee is a great marketer but he is off the rails on this one!

There are no such things as "alpha females" as he puts it!

Women are the natural nurturers and it's a disservice to men in my opinion. We don't need more softer, weaker and feminized men in the world!

[MzAsh]

I’m pretty sure that’s what Rich Cooper said too, but isn’t this why women are abandoning femininity? Because guys like him attempt to call stay at home parenthood as weaker and softer? Because when you have a rambunctious toddler at home with you all day, you must be anything but weak.

[coachTanthony]

I think the point is that many young entrepreneurs listen to Gary Vee and they want to strive for excellence just as Gary Vee has and now Gary Vee is basically saying don't be like me... be a stay at home dad... they are now scratching their head going huh?

I know a couple of stay at home Dads... it works for them because those guys run their business from home. These guys though have been in the trenches and are now able to do such a thing... which is not what Gary Vee is saying at all and that is a very different message!

[JREED9383]

If I had a woman who had a great career and wanted mentor be a stay at home dad. I would do it in a heart beat. although I would try to do something in my down time that could earn me extra cash like building furniture or continue my live of sculpting. Maybe even become a writer. I have been trying to write a book for years but never have time. I would get to see the children go day by day. I would get to put my culinary education to use at home and make wonderful meals for my family. being a stay at home dad would probably give me quite a bit of personal growth that I would never know otherwise. Now please don't get me wrong. I believe a man should provide for his family. But this is the 21 century and women are just as capable of bringing home the money. I can provide for my family by actually being there.

[Apple1996]

No I dont think so since is a moms job to be with her kids since she birthed them and is suppose to be breastfeeding. In nature the mom needs to be with the baby not the dad. Dads are suppose to be working and supporting the family, moms are suppose to be raising the kids

[Browser101]

Exactly right

[Princeofaljaz]

MHO right here.

[Avicenna]

I've probably done more child care than most fathers ( mostly due to working an altered schedule and having a
home office) and although it's great to spend more time with the kids, I don't see most of us as being suitable for the role.

That said, if one parent has to stay home, it should be the lower earner, and that isn't always the woman.

[NearlyNapping]

Well at one time the mom and dad both were stay at home. Then things changed, and the dads left to go somewhere else. It's debatable if that was a good thing. Then a century or so later, the moms left also. That was even more debatable.

So yea, society should have more stay at home dads, and more stay at home moms.

[Dinklex3]

If they want.
I'm not one to say society should have more this or that just because of gender.
On a side note
Both my parents were military.
My dad retired while my mom stayed in.
My dad was a med tech and quit to take care of my sisters and I. So from like 3rd grade on my dad was a stay at home dad and I loved every moment of it, lol.

[Sacrilege_is_hawt]

Stay at home and do what all day? Washing dishes And folding laundry takes like 30 minutes, sounds like a whole lot of masturbating if you ask me. Pretty sure thats what everyone does when they stay at home all day. Even if you're not the "bread winner" do something that earns a living.

[jennifer_bloom]

I think its best when both parents equally contribute to quality time with the kids but this situation could be difficult to maintain due to different work schedules or financial demands - I used to have a pastor who would sometimes spend his mornings and afternoons with the kids and he was male - his wife spent other times with the kids too

[Nik1hil]

Aw.. Hell No..
That's a bad example..
Parents should give kids plenty of time till they are toddler but when kids hit teenage parents or at least father should set an example of being a men..

Stay at home dad isn't wrong if the Dad is the bread winner if he Controls his online business from home..

[Nadim171]

Then you'd complain about how women will only date rich men, and how women have more privellages and feminism sucks

[Nik1hil]

@Nadim171 this opinion was not open to arguments..

[MzAsh]

Nadim, you are correct. We see it all the time, but the ones who complain provide themselves as an example of the mentality to stay away from, because with them it's damned if you do, damned if you don't. Some people will just refuse to rise up to the standards women set, but the good men will do so willingly, with a smile.

[Nadim171]

Yeah sure..

[lyssagirl]

I think a lot of guys would go nuts. Being a stay at home parent is very isolating and lonely at times and the work while there is a ton of it isn't very physical. Me n my husband switched places for awhile just to give him a break from the work force n get me out of the house. He lasted 5 months n he was like i can't stand this. But no family is same you need to do what works for your family

[Rangers]

No, men are supposed to be the providers while the mom stays at home and takes care of the baby. Correct me if I'm wrong, but recovery after giving birth is a long recovery and working during that recovery will be extremely difficult, you also have the woman's instinct come into play where they're protective of their young.

[ImagineSketchy]

I don't think most places could afford it honestly.
Also men don't lactate and can't breastfeed naturally under most circumstances... That being said, it would not be feasible for most families to have a stay at home father since men are primarily the breadwinners.

[Massageman]

It's certainly not the function of a society to consciously aim for having more or less stay-at-home das OR moms. Couples should just have to work things out for themselves.

Since more and more families require a two-income household to have a decent standard of living, this might mean a wider distribution of household chores, but it's up to the individual couples.

[MannMitAntworten]

As unusual as this roll reversal is too me, my brother is a stay at home parent... and frankly speaking he has always seemed the better parent. My niece, his daughter, is very well adjusted, happy, out going, and whatnot. So as far as this gender roll thing goes, I have to wonder whether it is less about gender and more about which parent is the better parent suited for the task of spending the greater time of raising their child.

[Bananaman177]

Every study I've ever seen shows that it leads to the wife becoming less and less attracted to her husband.

I think the odds of getting divorce-raped are already bad enough without doubling them.

[MzAsh]

I think it depends on what the man does while he’s home. To me, it’s extremely attractive when I come home and he’s got the house cleaned and dinner made. It shows that he’s a man in the way that he wants to be instead of thinking he’s above doing “women’s work.”

[Bananaman177]

I know a guy who spent his days as a househusband keeping the house clean and taking care of the kids, (boy and girl, aged 6 and 4) and that didn't prevent his wife from starting up an affair with her boss, and when he found out about it, she divorced him, and got custody of the kids, and he pays child support and alimony.

And that's why the marriage rate has plummeted to unprecedented levels and will keep plummeting, so congratulations. Look at the two women to the left of you. Now look at the two women on the right. Between the five of you, only one is going to get married. Best of luck.

Weird how the more women get what they want, the more Hellish life becomes.

[MzAsh]

Having an affair with your boss isn’t something that exclusively women do when they work, silly. Men do it and that’s why they’re so paranoid about it. It’s a guilty conscience. Thank goodness my man of 12 years doesn’t think that way.

[morrowlow]

it's bad enough that women are not women anymore. i think it's best to leave men alone and let them be masculine and i'm sure no woman in the world would want her husband to be a stay at home dad. women are already bitching that the men they like earn less money than them. now you're saying men should have no income and be home makers? yeah i'm sure men and women would love this

[Anonymous]

I didn't watch the video, but i think society should be more accepting of guys who want to be stay at home dads. That doesn't mean their should be more, that's up to the individual.

[esotericstory]

I think commuting is overrated. Most people should work in the house or close to their house like pre-industrial times. Mass moving to the city was a mistake. Commuting was a mistake. So to answer your question. Yes. But we need mass changes in the work life culture to facilitate a way where its viable for families and business alike.

[hahahmm]

The main beneficiary of two family incomes were the rich employers because a larger work force meant individual workers were worth less (could be paid less). Adjusted for inflation the current combined 2 income family only makes 23% more than what ONE income used to provide. Subtract out daycare & increased taxes and it’s probably way worse than that!

Now both parents are too stressed about work to help the other one wind down.

[esotericstory]

@hahahmm If you live with several families in one house its manageable.

[hahahmm]

Ha, you mean a commune. No. Personally I’m traditional. If my woman works it’s for fun not cause she has to

[esotericstory]

@hahahmm Grandparents parents and their children have lived in the same ancestral home for many generations. Its been normal until the Victorian obsession with modesty and privacy.

[PinkChampagne]

I think everyone should be free to choose how to live their lives and that society should have less of shallow influence over important questions of life

[abc3643]

Gender is irrelevant.
As long as one person in the family makes enough money that it is not a financial burden for the other to be "stay at home", that's all that matters.

[Anonymous]

You should be able to do whatever you want.

Personally I would find it emasculating to be a homemaker. But given that women have been given so many career opportunities it’s common that wife makes more than the husband. So sometimes this makes sense.

[Shahax]

"Should" is a little presumptuous, what we need for certain is more strong masculine figures in our children's lives

[Ellie-V]

“Should” is a very strong word so my answer is no but I personally wouldn’t mind it and I think it would be beneficial for the eradication of certain gender stereotypes.

[clampfan101]

They should simply be more respected. Too many see them as feminine for being “male moms”.

[coolhandroo]

No just more active parents of both genders. Kids eat soap then grow up and cut their dicks off. Mom and dad need to ratchet things up a notch

[AynonOMouse]

Even the women that claim to be okay with it won't hardly ever actually agree to it. They claim stay at home parenting is difficult, but they know it is actually easy so they don't want the man to have the easy responsibility.

[ronaldo75]

Breadwinner wives are also NOTORIOUS for playing on a man's masculinity, mocking and throwing the situation in his face anytime she's in a bad mood. I've seen it time and time again.

[IIGrifterSixII]

Yes since women on masse have partaken on an exodus from the home abandoning their roles as care givers men should step up and lead by example since a parent in the home lead to much more well balanced children according to a study by UCLA

[bangyourhead]

We're not really following gender norms with all the mothers in the work force, are we? I'd say there's a better chance that it's making us miserable, not doubling down on it.

[Harmseygrace]

No. The Bible says that the woman should fully submit to the man.

[MzAsh]

The Bible does say a lot of fucked up shit like that. Indeed.

[Harmseygrace]

It'd not messed up stuff. Eve ate the fruit and told Adam to eat it. Women are the original sinners.
Its also how women are biologically designed, how men are biologically designed, and how it should still be. The world worked a lot better that way and for good reason.

[MzAsh]

Yikes. This is a different discussion for a different day.

[Harmseygrace]

Okie dokie.

[Matt57]

I don’t support the idea of Stay at home dads, mainly at the baby/toddler stages of a child’s life. That is the time where kid’s are all about “only mommy”

[goaded]

Been there, done that (wifie makes twice what I could). It was good.

[Z3ID366]

I guess it's just for every household to decide I don't think it's for society

[vernalpath]

Yes! Whoever wants to do whatever. Whatever works. y'all are a team it doesn't matter who does what just do what you're good at and make it work

[nerms123]

All the sahds I have ever known have been really happy. I personally think they do an amazing job.

[taleswapper]

I think "society" doesn't get a say in whether, or how many, dads stay at home.

[SarahsSummer]

I dont think its up to "society". Its up to individual dads, and moms, of kids.

[Mädchen]

I think it should be more socially accepted. Wheter they want to be is another question

[zagor]

My friend stayed home with his kids, worked PT at a sporting goods store while his wife worked FT in an executive position. He also did a lot of mountaineering and such.

[hollypl18]

Every father should be a stay at home dad. I literally aspire to have a great career so that I can live that lifestyle.

[morrowlow]

yeah that would be very convenient for you and every other woman who wants it all. a career and a husband and kids there's just one problem here. most men are not stay at home cucks and you can't have everything.

[MzAsh]

Is that what women are when they stay at home? Cucks?

[morrowlow]

it's not the same for women. women don't want to be bread winners. they don't want and won't accept that kind of responsibility. a lot of women like the idea of not having to work and they like their husbands to mange the financial aspect of their life. women like it when their husbands take charge but men naturally don't like being under someone else's control that's why men have to be cucks to be stay at home dads

[MzAsh]

I would never not work. I love it. Even if I didn’t have an outside job, I’d work from home. Otherwise I’d get bored and get into some kind of trouble. You know what they say about indie hands.

And I’d never let anyone other than myself handling my finances unless I was incapacitated.

[MzAsh]

* idle hands

[morrowlow]

i'm sure lots of women who haven't been indoctrinated in the feminist ideology would work part time or not at all and leave all that to their husbands but forget about that. would you pay for your husband if he decides to be a stay at home dad? remember you'll have to work harder because he wouldn't have an income and when you come home at night and your hungry and exhausted you can't be mad that he hasn't cooked anything. he's a strong independent man and not your property and if he decides that he wants a divorce you've got to pay him alimony

[MzAsh]

Of course I would. I’ve already had to do it when he had broken his foot and back and was confined to a bed and wheelchair for 6 months. I worked and took care of him.

[morrowlow]

come on! i'm talking about your whole life. sure providing for someone else for 6 months is not easy but it's nowhere near what a man does for his family

[MzAsh]

In our 12 years I’ve always matched what he makes if not more since I have two, technically 3 jobs.

[MzAsh]

So I guess I’ve always done “what the man does” and I must say it’s awesome. I love what I do. And I won’t stop until I can’t physically do it.

[Hannah12112004]

Yes, there is to many stereotypes saying men and dads can’t stay at home dad. Their should be more men enforcing and proving that wrong.

[cheesyballs_]

Nope. They don't have breasts to feed the baby.

And I don't trust baby formula.

[Wolkmi]

Haha (not me) some guys have tits too.

[Jltakk]

No. Jobs with highest suicide rates are male majority, take men out and we're still not gonna see a spike in, say, female truck driver employment immediately or anytime soon.

[justawhiteman]

I would totally be up for being a stay at home dad.. although, women love men who work and provide

[Danganronpa_senpai]

I think we should have more stay at home moms again.

[Lightning8]

It needs more dads and cohesive male positivity in general.

[ronaldo75]

It's up to each family how they operate but I think it's a good idea. There has been a 30 year war on fatherhood so it would be a nice change.

[Tslaveee]

No but the dad should be present to add a role model to the son or a a positive image of what a man is for his daughter to follow

[bamesjond0069]

Stay at home dads? Wtf? Thats some gay shit. Women stay home men work.

[MzAsh]

Men should definitely be more hands on involved with their children, regardless of whether or not they stay at home or not. It takes two to parent.

[bamesjond0069]

Wym more? aren't they already? They work then they come home and get to be a dad. It should continue to primarily be the mom who spends time with young children.

[MzAsh]

In that case, then it should continue to be women who primarily win custody battles and collect child support and alimony should a separation happen.

[bamesjond0069]

Not really. Ideally a child has a family. In a family the best way to function is mom primarily cares and dad provides leadership finances etc. In a single parent household, there is no difference between having a dad do both roles or a mom do both roles.

[Daikoten]

if you think a stay at home dad is gay then you must have a fragile masculinity

[bamesjond0069]

@Daikoten yeah i do. Because its super gay to be a stay at home dad. Thats some cuck shit because your wife would definitely cheat on you if you did it.

[MzAsh]

Ideally the man parents as much as she does. No excuse.

[Daikoten]

@bamesjond0069 you're pathetic lmao.

[bamesjond0069]

So nobody works? Thats great. Smh or both parents have bum jobs because how you get ahead working part time or weird hours?

[MzAsh]

No, dad can have time the kids when he’s not working and on the weekends if the whole 9 to 5 jive is your thing. Mom can have a break and do whatever she needs to get done, or maybe that’s when she works some of the time too.

[MzAsh]

Or if you’re smart, you can learn to make money from home, like Gary V. He’s knows his shit.

[lumos]

Imagine being so insecure in your own sexuality that thinking being a dad who is present for his children is "gay". Wow.

[MzAsh]

Yeah it’s pretty sad and pathetic.

[bamesjond0069]

@lumos a man can't work and be present? I think y'all might have had some very unhealthy examples of fathers growing up.

[lumos]

He can, but he won't be *as* present as a father who's at home with his kids. I just don't see how working makes him more heterosexual.

[bamesjond0069]

@lumos because men are supposed to work and provide for their family? Dads are supposed to be good examples.

[lumos]

Again, what does working have to do with someone's sexuality? Does not working want to make you suck another guy's dick? Or take it up the ass?

[lumos]

make you want to* haha

[bamesjond0069]

@lumos kinda yeah. Not specifically but men who dont act masculine become more and more feminine.

[lumos]

hahaha oh my god.

[NorthwestRider]

I am going to stay home to take care of the fur babies while my future wife makes $$$

[Dean_98]

Yes, if they are capable and is the best for their families economically

[TheFlak38]

sure because things are going very good with women in positions of power.

[Guanfei]

Wouldn't mind being one, but it's not easy living with one salary only.

[Morbidwolf]

God yes we should!!! I wish it was more socially acceptable to be a stay at home dad!

[doublenb14]

I totally agree. i would love to be a stay at home dad

[Kaseen74]

I was a stay home Dad and let her Perdue her career

[aaroon16]

Completely agree
Would love to be a stay at home dad