Do you think men or women are more selfish?

Question

Some studies say men, some women. In my opinion both.

pikuroy · Accepted Answer

Selfish or selfless happens with identification.

Generally, a human being identifies himself and draws an invisible closed loop. Everything inside that loop is his, and he is selfless toward those. Anything that is outside that loop, doesn't belong to him and he is selfish or transactional toward those.

It's the basic nature of life. This tendency starts from reptiles and comes all the way to the top. The loop size and what is included inside that loop varies but the idea remains same.

1. If a person is selfish, mean, he never included you in his life. He will be with you as long as things and favour are flowing in, into his loop.

2. If a person is selfless, he will find more pleasure in giving to you, which means you are inside his loop.

There are many factors that make people adjust loop size, include or exclude people, mostly out of fear and insecurity. Greed is also an insecurity because the person thinks there won't be sufficient for him.

This loop should always be exanding and boundless. Only then a person would improve in his life. It requires a great deal of courage and effort to do it, AND doing it also gives you great deal of courage and confidence. It works both ways.

If bad incidents, fear and insecurity rules him, then that loop constricts and ultimately the person self destructs because there is no one he can call his own.

I guess this much concept would make you make sense of all the relationship and behaviour dynamics.

🙏🙏Namaskar🙏🙏

OlderAndWiser · Accepted Answer

In my opinion, questions such as this are a waste of time. They lead to overgeneralizations that are not useful and, in fact, can be quite counterproductive.

I am in a relationship with a particular woman. I am not in a relationship with the statistically average woman. Either my girlfriend is selfish or she isn't (and, no, she is not.) It doesn't matter whether the girl that lives next door is selfish, or whether the average woman who lives in her town is selfish or whether the average woman in the world is selfish. All that matters to me is one woman who lives at a particular location about 80 miles southeast of me.

And, for her, it doesn't matter whether the average man is more selfish than the average woman. All that she needs to worry about is whether I am selfish (and I don't think I am, but I am biased and I would defer to any statement she might make on that subject.)

If I break up with her, knowing that women are more selfish than men (or vice versa) won't help me to navigate the waters of the dating world. And it won't help me to get to know the next woman (and I certainly hope the current one is The One and there is no next one.)

So, I ask you. . . even IF you can arrive at a valid conclusion that, e. g., men are slightly more selfish than women, how would that information help you in any real or substantial way?

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Well as a woman i say women can be more selfish in some areas. Men can be more giving in my experience and more forgiving. But also when a man happenn to be selfish he is usually much bitchy than a selfish woman

NorthShoreCalling · Accepted Answer

I think that depends on the person as I can think of examples on good and bad on both sides pretty equally in my experience.

razelove · Answer

I think men and women are equally selfish, women just on average have a wider field of tools to work with that allows them to obtain what they desire, especially young women as opposed to young men.

Everyone's selfish except when there's something you desire so much that you're willing to give things up for it.

TOTEMPLASTER · Answer

Women are more selfish than men but that is a critically useful genetic trait.
They are the ones who have the responsibility of raising children, which requires much time and considerable resources. To succeed in this vital task, they must gather and keep as much food, clothing, and money as possible, so if viewed logically, their 'selfishness' is not actual selfishness.

kingofthellamas · Answer

This is just a reductive question. How do you define selfish? Is it not sharing the last of the peanut better? Is it not letting you sister borrow 100 because she still owes you but needs it for school books? Where do you draw the line on what matters? Against whose opinion on what selfish is? Why is there opinion the standard?

Once you've decided that, answer is it always wrong to be selfish? Do you have an obligation to be more generous if you are more privileged, and even more so if you are not self-made? Does age matter? Nation?

How do you run an experiment to see? So after all of that, in the end you might get a stick to beat the opposite gender with. One gender is seen as more selfish. Who care because I'm going to guess that you could then look at some other undesirable trait such as, forgetfulness next. Round and round we go in spiral to the bottom of nothing. Pointless.

Novacane · Answer

Yeah, I would say both, it really depends on the person's nature and how they grew up, I've seen plenty of men and women that are selfish. But I think women are more secretly selfish like you can tell that they do not want to but force themselves or try to find a way out of it, vs men are just openly selfish and don't care if you see them as selfish.

hahahmm · Answer

Depends on which men and women we compare. I do believe that when a man and woman are fully committed to each other neither one is as selfish as otherwise. And also that it's VERY difficult for a feminist to be committed to a man since she views him as competition.

knottywriter · Answer

Both. I think a lot of people are selfish to meet their own needs and as long as their needs are met, the other person's needs are not important to them.

Nalix · Answer

I bet they're selfish in different ways. Men tend to be more ambitious, women tend to be more self-absorbed and vain, and thinking that they deserve things just for being women. The latter is largely men's fault, because men will give women things just for being women, which leads them to expect it and take it for granted.

EssenceOfLight · Answer

Difficult to determine.
Most social studies are crap, because they are basing on question catalogue and participants tend to reject negative traits of themselves. The next problem is what make a person selfless or selfish? I'm ready to risk my life for life of my daughter but I wouldn't die for my woman or family members. Does it makes me selfless or selfish? Statistically it makes me selfish because I'm willing to risk my life only for 1 person but not for 10.

Relentless1 · Answer

I think it’s less about gender and more about personality and upbringing. There are triggers for some people that make them selfish or come off as selfish - money, fame, looks, intelligence, being hurt in the past, etc. we are all selfish at some level, putting our needs first and it’s not always intentional.

misanthropistkev · Answer

I’d say it’s like lying you know they say men lie more which we do but women tell bigger lies
I feel it’s the same with being selfish women are more selfish on a day to day basis while men are really selfish when it really matters but then again it might be both men and women when pressed or shit hits the fan I know very few who wouldn’t do everything under the sun to save their own ass

BeenThereLovedIt · Answer

People are selfish. I don't think it's a gender issue. I think it's a cultural issue. We can thank the boomers for the slide into narcissism.

Jjpayne · Answer

I'd say it's both, I've seen both personally. That's why you have to be so careful in relationships because too much entitlement in a relationship can kill it, you need to communicate and share for a relationship to be healthy

Waldoe · Answer

they cannot "Both" be more selfish, it's a degree of selfishness, humans are selfish by nature, we have to be, it's me 1st, survival of the fittest... may the best man win... no one will give you anything... it's life

Floppy2112 · Answer

This is a loaded question. I don't really know how to answer it. It depends on what a person believes about the other and if they look at relationships in terms of what they can get out of it, vs. what they can do to make the other person happy.

AndyOh · Answer

I agree, I think both. Depends on the dynamic.  Women have a lot more to deal with in life though, so I think they deserve to be a little more selfish.

hellacray · Answer

With my personal experience women.

Even when they act like they care at the end of the day they're still doing it for them. Almost like a pr stunt to make yourself appear like a generous person in front of people you're trying to impress.

BeyondHuman · Answer

It's not reserved to one specific gender all humans are tainted with such affairs. It's within our own personal dignity to choose not to be.

jasco · Answer

I personally think all of humanity is selfish at one point regardless. Babies are selfish when they start crying just for attention so if a baby which doesn't know anything can be selfish than so can everyone else

RateThemBabe · Answer

Selfish when it comes to what aspects? Generally both, but it depends

Midnight_Kiss · Answer

It's six to one and half a dozen to the other, selfishness isn't gender specific, it's person dependant.

Hispanic-Cool-Guy · Answer

Equal. We are naturally selfish to a degree which is healthy.  Extreme selfishness comes from people that are narcissist, which is a individual case, not specific to gender.

Kas19 · Answer

They're both selfish and controlling in their own ways.

luvstoned4him · Answer

On both sides   It's more a subjective thing tho

DJB72 · Answer

I've met both selfish and selfless of both genders. It seems to me that circumstances might make a difference, but bender doesn't

Hanoi_Jane00 · Answer

Generally women. I find guys to be generous to a fault especially in a relationship.

Ripper_E · Answer

People in general are selfish. All you have to do is go about your day and you will see that.

lancecantee · Answer

I don't think this is a gender issue. I've known a lot of selfish people, and in my opinion, it has more to do with environment and genetic predisposition.

Toast792 · Answer

It isn't something to be determined by gender. It's determined by individual.

loveslongnails · Answer

I think they're equally selfish, but women have a much longer laundry list of "wants" than men do !! LOL

_no_one_ · Answer

Kids.  Ain't no one more selfish than kids (regardless of gender)  I myself was ig...

cth96190 · Answer

Women, by a big margin, as a result of millions of years of natural selection.

Wiredone · Answer

Personally, I think it's a tie. There are a lot of men who are selfish, then there are a lot of women that are selfish.

MountAverage · Answer

There are no significant differences. It comes down to the individual.

Gedaria · Answer

I don't think it's a gender thing, it more like a upbringing..

DiscomfortZone · Answer

That's really not a dichotomy. A person can be a narcissistic ass regardless of gender.

phoebe245 · Answer

In my opinion it depends on the person not the gender

Glasgow55 · Answer

Depends on the individual. I don’t think one sex is more or less selfish than the other.

Anonymous · Answer

By women's standards men are more selfish. By men's standards women are more selfish. They are both correct.

Luckycharms12 · Answer

All of us are selfish in our own ways men and women

coolhandroo · Answer

If you're gonna beat my game you ladies better step it up. No one does me like me🏆

2inthepink · Answer

I'm pretty high ranking in that department hence I'm staying single

Slim57 · Answer

The average man would go out of his way to help a woman that needs help but I dont think you could say the same about the average woman

hjoseph7 · Answer

Women are definitely more selfish than men, but men are meaner, crueler and more violent.

GoodGuyBreakingBad · Answer

I would say Women are less selfish and nicer

ayomanwya · Answer

Both can be equally selfish

REALSTEEL · Answer

i agree girl i say both

Dchrls78104 · Answer

I agree with your opinion.

likelyOK · Answer

It definitely depends on the person

najekim · Answer

Both can be depending on the subject.

Citizenkirk · Answer

Thier too MOD too be shellfish.

Laciandmaci · Answer

I would say it can be equal!

MillenniumBill · Answer

Let's just say it balances out in the long run.

helva · Answer

Just as you I think both.

HuTao · Answer

From my experience, women

collie22 · Answer

who ever has the most money

Likes2drive · Answer

I think it’s pretty even

Nazgol · Answer

Both. But probably women more

Snakeyes7 · Answer

Yeah I'd say it's equal

CubaPirate · Answer

Totally depends on the individual

krin_m · Answer

Yeah, can't generalize it. Depends on the person!

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