Please tell me other coupled-up people are having the worst day ever on valentines day?

[Anonymous]

Something happens to me every Valentine’s Day, something in my relationship goes wrong! Last year, he couldn’t go out to get me flowers until later in the day so I panick bought my own on his card for revenge then refunded it when he DID go out to get me flowers moments after I bought them. This year I got mad at him over something I misunderstood, and the argument of course brought up lots of other things and we had a big argument. We haven’t argued in months. We’re normally soo good! What is it about Valentine’s Day that just brings out the worst in us? I don’t normally care about material things yet last year there I was panicking about if he was going to get me flowers. This morning I read something and interpret it one way when it was really something else and I fly off the handle? What the heck? I think Valentine’s Day is there to pressure everyone into making themselves feel like they have a perfect relationship to the point that it’s at a detriment to the relationship. Comment below if you also have experienced the Valentine’s curse. <3

[ShiftingMonke]

I mean, last year seemed like it was your fault for scrambling to buy yourself flowers, and this your you admit to misinterpreting something and overreacting because of it. I think it's less of a curse and more of your own fixation on the wrong aspect of the holiday. Flowers and chocolate aren't the only way to show love in a relationship, and it's probably not healthy to think so.

I have had a woman get extremely upset I didn't do enough on valentines day, but since the relationship was less then a month old, I broke it off and I've not been terribly concerned about the holiday since, I do nice things for my spouse all year round, and with my work schedule and kids, most holidays are put off to the weekend anyway.

[Asker]

Thanks for your reply… I try not to focus on the material things but I do like a bunch of flowers at least, something easy to get. On top of that though, I hate unnecessary arguments and today he chose to draw one out so the whole evening was basically tainted with that. We hardly argue and today of all days we did. It sucks :/. Worse, I left the living room to calm down and he didn’t even come to check on me for over an hour :(

[ShiftingMonke]

They might seem easy to get on paper, but a nice custom arrangement of roses could be tricky to get last minute. Then again, he could've probably planned it better.
On that note, his 'drawing it out' might come from feelings of inadequacy, since he dropped the ball last year and didn't have a chance to redeem himself this year since the argument started. Not that it's a valid reason though.
As far as him abandoning you for an hour, I think that's wise. If the argument was more heated than normal, it was probably best that you both got a break from each other for awhile to let the blood cool off the fact that you timed it makes it seem theatrical though.

My suggestion? Let the night progress as normal, avoid conflict. Tomorrow, change your phone's date back to the 14th and show him- then suggest a do-over. Hopefully something as silly as that can resolve the mood and hopefully break the curse, since technically it'll be the 15th.

[Asker]

Thanks for your advice!

[ShiftingMonke]

You're most welcome, and good luck!

[LazerBean]

Nope, ours has been great. It helps to not do weird stuff out of being negatively emotional.

[Ms_Facesitter]

One of my friends is going to a counselor because of their relationship about to be broken up