My girlfriend, an ex-groupie?

[Anonymous]

Hi.

I'm dealing with a problem om distrust with my current girlfriend. Due to her being honest / drunk / stupid, she's gone and told me about two celebrities she's slept with.

There's also one she hasn't told me about, which she left out clear evidence for though. So it was like telling me.

I also know for a fact that she's constantly checking up on one of them (Facebook), and I've found some sort of a list where she makes up which celebrities she wants to sleep with. Which naturally, disgust me.

Shes also very much in love with me. But I can't really seem to wrap my head around this and decide whether or not I wanna get rid of her or not. I love her, and I've certainly done some "bad" things in my past, but I've never made a list of set goals etc. Secondly, this is annoying since I have to see these people every once in a while on TV etc, and by this get reminded of her slutty past. It also makes me second guess her stories. Whenever she tells me a story from her pats, I conclude for myself that there's been some f'cking around involved. Also annoying.

How, how how, do I deal with this in a reasonable manner? I need to rid myself of these thoughts.

Thanks.

Updates

+1 y

ps. this was all before we met.

[onemoreplease]

Hmmm... it's pretty understandable that you wouldn't be happy with your girlfriend right now. Some of the things you've mentioned are just f--ed up, no question. Checking up on exes on Facebook and making "to do" lists are really disrespectful to you. And unless you were begging her to tell you, there's really no reason why she needs to give you detailed info about who she's slept with before.

But it seems like the real problem is how YOU feel about her now. You're "disgusted" and "annoyed" and keep getting reminded of her "slutty past." Do you think this is something you can get over, and get back to seeing her the way you did when you fell for her? She must have some good qualities that made you love her in the first place, so do those things outweigh the negative stuff you've found out recently? Do you even WANT to feel good about her again?

[Anonymous]

Well most people do have a sexual past.

Think the important thing is that it should be in her PAST if she is ready to be with you.

If she is checking up on one of them all the time she has some weird obsession going on. It doesn't sound very mature.

You have to decide, I would even say she might need counseling.

It would not be out of line for you to set an ultimatum for her and see how she handles that.

[Temporary46]

The second thought that I have about this is maybe she is trying to become "accidentally" impregnated by a celebrity.

[Pedantic]

You found a list where she makes up celebrities she wants to sleep with?

I don't know about you man, but I'd have serious reservations about being with a girl who keeps a "to f*ck" list instead of a "to do" list.

She's got to understand that all of those behaviors need to get back into the closet. The skeletons are rattling a little too loud in there, and they need to keep it down. The way I see it, she is struggling with her old lifestyle and the new.

Even if you help her with the transisition, all that stuff is going to be eating away at you every time you see a celeb. The only thing that can defeat that is learning to trust her, but is she worthy of that trust? She might just go and do another celeb. You can give her a chance, but she has a lot of trust to earn and be worthy of before the issue can be put to rest.

[native65]

Shes also very much in love with me" REALLY!?!?!?!?! If she was TRUST ME she wouldn't sleep around with ANYONE else - famous or not. How to deal with this? You don't, be done with her. That's how deal with it. Kick that chick to the curb... unless you don't think you deserve better?

[Asker]

this was before my time. but you can add another celebrity to the list.

[native65]

Than what's in the past is in the past. Give her a chance. What she did back then shouldn't effect anything with you.

[guy532]

I have to be honest, if you're having major doubts now they're just going to get bigger the more you get to know her. I wouldn't be surprised if there's more skeletons in her closet that you don't know of yet. I say in situations like this, go with your gut, it's your best bet. Good luck.

[michael0314]

she did what she wanted to do, and gained sexual experience along the way (bet she gives great head). what's done is done, get over your hang ups, or move on. it's simple.

[pixiestix123]

can I ask you a question first? how did you meet your girlfriend?

[sweet_18]

Yeah she does sound like a whore, what with the list and all.

[AndyWes]

She's a slut. Walk away.

[Anonymous]

lol which celebrities?