Things That Will Turn Any Guy Off! Learning How To Date Drama Free

We have all heard the horror stories, the confusion, the insecurities, and the inevitable broken hearts that fall victim to the battle of the dating world.

But right now I'm going to present a way of dating that makes it a little bit easier and quite possibly (holds breath) enjoyable?!!! After all, dating, chasing and falling in love is meant to be fun, right?

Now this article is for chicks, by a chick, but some guys might appreciate what I have to say, so please continue reading on =)

There are a number of ways in which girls can resolve the confusion, insecurity, and venerability that we feel when it comes to dating. So here are some tips which I have discovered from my own experience and from my girlfriends' experiences that we do wrong when it comes to relationships and how we can fix them.

Clingy and Needy

Sometimes this happens at the flick of a switch when we begin to like someone. I find it funny when we are just friends with someone we can act confident, cool and in control but as soon as we like them, all hell breaks loose and we turn into some green eyed monster. So what does acting clingy and needy entail? Calling your boyfriend EVERY time you feel bored, lonely or want to do something. Yes boyfriends are people that you can emotionally lean on, but they are not your own personal oxygen tank!



Controlling

Some of things that are seen as controlling behavior includes calling him all the time, checking up on him, being uber paranoid that he is cheating on you with another girl, xbox or with another guy. A lot of relationships are built on trust and if you cannot trust him when he is not with you, then you don't have a healthy relationship.

Another controlling thing to do is give him the silent treatment or act bitchy so that you get a certain reaction from him. So instead of communicating how you feel you act up because you want more attention from him. Not good for the relationship and eventually the guy will tire from all the games you are playing with him and eventually call your bluff or give up.

"Don't discuss things like future family vacations while you're casually dating. "

Looking Too Far Ahead

Ok so you have been out on the first date with a guy. Now my next suggestion wouldn't be to start making wedding plans and naming the 6 kids you are going to have with him. Don't discuss things like future family vacations while you are casually dating. I know that being single can feel lonely at times and so when you go on a date with a guy who you think has a lot of potential you start to jump ahead of yourself.

Looking too far ahead can create drama and inevitability result in the guy losing interest in you, because you become way too easy to read. When you are no longer such a challenge to a guy (although guys don't like to admit it) then he is onto the next girl that peaks his interest. Dating is fun, you should be able to enjoy the courting process! Be excited that you don't know where this relationship could end up rather than being upset because your not certain where you stand.

Trying To Change Him

Ok I know this from first hand experience. If you cannot stand something about a guy then simply don't date him, because there is no chance that you are going to be able to change him. You either have to accept him how he is or not accept him at all. There is no such thing as a "fixer upper" boyfriend. Everyone is unique and special in their own way and you just need to find someone who you appreciate their own unique qualities. Not only this, if you try and change a man and ultimately succeed, he loses a sense of himself and becomes unhappy anyways. Plus you lose respect for him, because he wasn't able to stand up for what he is all about.
"There is no such thing as a "fixer upper" boyfriend."
Unless you want to see how quickly a guy will run out the door and leave you standing in the dust, follow these tips on dating drama free! Come from a place of deep self respect and assurance and dating will become a game that is whole lot more fun and drama free.


Hot Alpha Female
What is an Alpha Female and what makes her so special? How does she date her guys and what kind of issues does she have to face? Hot Alpha Female is a blog, dedicated for chicks by a chick. (Although I do get a lot of male readers) We tackle issues of dating, dating and more dating and bring out things that need to be discussed and discuss it!
6|1
11|9

Join the discussion

0/2500

Submit

What Guys Said 9

  • I guess one benefit of being unattractive is never having to deal with dating drama.. Lol

    0|0
    0|0
  • I agree with WeaponZero.. 90% of the article is spot on.. except for looking too far ahead.. 90% of guys DO NOT like jumping through hoops to comfort a girl's self-esteem and insecurites (I mean "the chase").. most guys would be flattered.. it's cute to know she wants things to go there.. talking about that stuff doesn't scare a guy away.. unless he's just looking for sex.. are you not saying it because ur afraid to scare away the ones just looking for sex away? odd dating strategy to say the least..

    0|0
    0|0
  • I think these things here could work for guys, too, like if a guy is inexperienced with dating he maybe clingy, etc... basically thing's that will turn off anybody, lol. Good Article!

    0|0
    0|0
  • How about being confusing? Because it literally drives a guy insane trying to tell if a girl likes him or not, especially if she's being inconsistent with her signals. Just one 'sign of disinterest' would just send him to oblivion, even if she gave him a billion signs of interest before or after.

    0|0
    0|0
  • I hate it when girls tease and lead guys on. I also hate it how girls make it extremely unobvious if they like a guy or not. I struggle to tell the difference whether she is just being friendly to me, or she actually likes me. I also hate it when girls who have a boyfriend flirt with me.

    0|0
    0|0
  • I like the article and I think it's 90% true, but I think the reasoning behind some of the things is wrong. I don't know very many guys older than 21 who enjoy "chases" and "challenges" from women. Where I come from, all that stuff is another word for "drama" and I got enough of that in my teen years. Guys by the time they're in their mid 20s are through making a "game" out of dating. So although your conclusions are correct, the reasons behind them are incorrect.

    0|0
    0|0
  • You forgot the most important one: criticism!

    Yes, there is a place for healthy criticism, but it must be done right. (eg. start with boosting his fragile ego, then make suggestions to change). You want men to open up to you, but if you hit them with your potent verbal sledgehammer, then you push them away.

    Eg. women want romantic candle-lit dinner, but when he does it she only points out all the things he did wrong. Even though she wanted to help, he felt attacked. He won't treat her again!

    0|0
    0|0
  • Agreed for the most part.

    the only thing is that while I don't like self conscious drama queens, girls who purposely bluntly tease and play hard to get is a turn off, because it shows they are insecure and have a desire to compete. the whole "let him chase you" can be interpreted a lot of ways. if a girl takes the initiative it's very attractive.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Having good looks is great and you might get lucky --- some guys would pursue you for it alone. But nothing beats a confident and independent girl who can stand up for herself and take no crap from anyone. Not only you become more appealing and attractive, it adds up to your stronger personality and guys won't look at you as "Just another pretty face." Show 'em what you got!

    http://howtodate.blog.com/download-free-ebooks/

    0|0
    0|0

What Girls Said 11

  • This was very good.Fun to read.Its common sense but somehow we don't always follow it.

    0|0
    0|0
  • I know some men that could benefit from this advice as well!

    0|0
    0|0
  • You can change him. I don't mean exactly everything.. but like, the guy I like used to smoke like a freaking chimney, and lately he smokes 2 times a day [4 days a week] he used to smoke every single day, more than 5 cigarrates. and he thanks me for that.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Hey ch3rrypi3-08 hahah thanks so much for sharing that. I think its great to realize that hey we all make mistakes and we just need to dust ourselves off, learn what we needed to learn and move on!

    Good on ya!

    Hot Alpha Female

    0|0
    0|0
  • So true. I've done a couple of those things with this one guy I wasn't in a formal, long term relationship and yes, he dumped me after a few months. lol He was like "Damn, you're not even my girlfriend officially yet and you're ALREADY acting like this??! I can't imagine how you will be when you actually ARE my girlfriend and I don't want to find out. See ya"

    I can laugh now about it but I was really hurt at the moment. Now I realize I was a bit ridiculous and have changed my ways completley

    0|0
    0|0
  • Loved it, thank you! (:

    0|0
    0|0
  • Couldn't have said it better myself ! Amazing.

    0|0
    0|0
  • Awesome article, thanks :)

    0|0
    0|0
  • I really like this it is a lot of help and a lot of me is discribed in there!

    0|0
    0|0
  • I wish that I could have read all this each time I've "liked" a certain guy because it's so true and helps explain why I've been getting rejected all the time though I've been told that I'm pretty and nice. Fortunately I started realizing all of this almost a year ago from this one guy and from reading the books Mars and Venus on a Date and The Rules...but I tend to sometimes mess up anyways! At least with my new crush I haven't been that pursuing or clingy...and he seems to kinda like me too!

    0|0
    0|0
  • Gd thing I dnt do any of tht!:D

    0|0
    0|0
Loading...