Why Am I Always The Rebound chick and the appetizer chick?

Before I explain let me define what I mean.
Rebound Chick: A girl Who Guys talk to, to get over someone else but they never date her.
Appetizer Chick: Something to satisfy until the main dish the one you wanted comes out. I don't understand I think it's my fault. With every guy I talked to I'm always The rebound chick and the appetizer chick. I'll give you two situations that really happened to me.

#1. I was talking to this guy let's call him john. John and I were best friends for a while first (4 years) He claimed he loved me and wanted to be with me so I started falling in love. After a few months he ended it saying I'm not ready for a relationship, he's too busy but a month later he had a girl friend. I feel like i was The Appetizer in this scenario.

#2. This guy I was talking to for a while told me he'd just broken up with his girlfriend a couple weeks before we started talking. I started to fall for him. He started calling and texting less and less finally he told me he found someone. What about me?

So why am I always the rebound chick and the appetizer chick. I feel like my time is being used until they find a girl they really want. I do not give up sex so that can't be a reason to stay. The guys are ages 19 and 22.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • You're young. It could be that you are accepting subpar behavior from guys without even realizing it. The only thing I can really say is keep your standards high. Don't allow guys to treat you like that. If I found something to be off, chances are something was. Listen to your guy and don't be afraid to cut them out of your life.

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What Guys Said 2

  • So the first guy you knew for 4 years, and you went out for months, and you really liked him... but there was no sex? Maybe they both decided to be with a woman that were actually sexually attracted to them?

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  • Perhaps you are a bit too nice (if there's even such a thing)

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    • A lot of guys tell me oh I wouldn't mind a nice girl bit when they see I'm too nice they run.

      What wrong with too nice?

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    • Hesitate to speak their mind about?

    • About anything that might be put up for debate; they do not want to bother anybody, so they don't speak their mind about anything that may be opposed.

What Girls Said 5

  • It happens to all of us unfortunately :/ You just can't let it get to you. Keep trying and you'll find a guy who's right for you :)

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  • You are a rebound chick because you allow yourself to be one.

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  • You made it too easy. Guys like a challenge.

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  • Maybe you don't make it known that you're falling for them so they assume you're just a really nice person and see you as a friend?

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    • I tell them that I like them when I do. And they say they feel the same. Then a few weeks later they have someone else.

  • You're just not girlfriend material.

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