I can't swim! Should I tell my date?

It's so embarrassing.. I'm 20 and I can't swim. I'm afraid of water. Yesterday I was on a date with a guy who loves swimming all over the world. I'm afraid he will arrange something in the water. I'm also afraid he will never see me again if I tell him, but I think he should know.. It's so so embarrassing.

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Thank you for your kind replies everybody

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Trust me, you are not alone. I have trained with a few Marines and Sailors that has shown fear of water, thought of drowning, or certain marine life causing that might inflict pain or death (whether it be a pool or open waters); however, their fear only extends to a point when their feet can no longer touch the bottom or ankle deep. Question is, to what extent do you belong? So you don't know how to swim. No big deal. I just hope your fear of water does not extend to fear of bathing (to clean yourself).

    One thing is for certain though, any phobia an individual may have MUST be known to the other party to prevent what may lead to trauma. Having them know may help them assist you in overcoming that fear. Have this guy teach you basic fundamentals. Your body is buoyant as long as your lungs have air; once you don't have any, you will start to sink slowly (if you don't use other methods to sink faster). More and likely, this guy will probably enjoy teaching you, especially when he will get to spend an entire day with you and able to hold you or if you grab him for dear life. Just get him to teach you where you can touch the ground and at least where the water is just up to your breast to give you that safety net.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • No Big Deal and Don't be afraid of being this Fifth Wheel Because... I'm 20 and can't swim.
    If you Both do happen to go for the waters, Level with him on your own 'Level' of Swimming. Explain you are Not even the Best doggie paddler here, dear, and perhaps with your sad, puppy dog eyes, he will give you a Surprise: "Let me show you the way of the waves, babe."
    Good luck and Nothing to lay down in the corner over with Rover. xx

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What Guys Said 12

  • You are not alone. There are more people out there that can't swim than you think. I can't swim very well either. If he never wants to see you again because you can't swim then he is not worth your time in the first place. So yes, be honest and tell him. :)

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  • yes. if you have a phobia involving his hobby, that's kinda something he should know.
    and if he decides that a great way to get to know you, and spend time with you, is by him taking the initiative and teaching you to swim and be more comfortable? Let him. Learning to swim is a skill that can save lives, he'll be right there so you'll be OK, and it is actually a great way for you to spend time with each other and form a bond.

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  • The human body has a lower density thus it floats. People drown becausd they panic or in very cold water when numbed by the temperature shock.

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  • I highly suggest that you tell him even if it is in passing. Otherwise he will feel rejected if he does aranfe something with the water and you freak at the last minute. If you sweetly ask him I'm sure he will help teach you to swim.

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  • lol, i kinda hope he does never see you again if you tell him cause you'd be the first person ever to get rejected because you can't swim

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  • Ha-ha itss finee! Just tell him... Infact it would be fun.. Cause then he can teach you how to swim... And it will fun for both of you

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  • I think you should tell him sooner rather than later more than likely he will think it's cute and he'll feel privileged that you told him and he'll most likely want to help you learn how to swim and then it can be something you do together he will try to help you conquer your fear :)

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  • Before he playfully pushes you off a dock, yes.

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  • Perhaps he'll show you.

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  • Tell him! He might just help you face yor fears

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  • Why do you need to tell this to your boyfriend?

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  • LMAO !!!

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What Girls Said 9

  • It's not embarrassing! If he likes you he'll probably think it's really cute that you can't swim and might even try to help you get over your fear. Either way you shouldn't worry about it. It's no big deal at all!

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  • Tell him definitely. Add that you want to learn but you're afraid of the water. He will probably offer to help you. This will be an excellent chance to bond and learn.

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  • Of course you should tell him.. And the sooner the better.

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  • Lol it's ok, dont worry! I'm sure thats not a big deal, even for him. Maybe it turns out to be something good and he gives you some swimming classes ;p

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    • That's exactly what I was thinking: what a better way to bond than him teaching you.
      Let me paint the scenario: you're scared, he's excited to help you. You both get in the water, you hold on to his strong athletic arms. He feels empowered to be holding your body. You have the incentive to perform well for him.
      You should not be scared of this situation, you should look forward for him to invite you to it.
      Look on the bright side: free swimming lessons :D :p

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    • @mikemx55 hahaha maybe you're right

    • @mikemx55 LOL perfect scenario! WRITE A BOOK ALREADY! :p

  • well that s a good opportunity to learn ;)
    with him as an instructor I am sure you guys will have a blast ;) ;)

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  • Ask him to teach you. It could be a fun date. Besides, you really should know how to.

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  • Tell him! Better than drowning

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  • tell him he can proberbly help you get over the fear of water and teach you to swim if you need to

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  • no, if he loves swimming then let him teach you, let him know you can't swim very well but you're willing to learn from him. that way you can carry on dating and learn an important life skill

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