Double standards about height in men and feminine women?

So I overheard a conversation today... First off this does not apply tp me because I am really tall but I want to make a case and question for the shorter guys. Well a guy was having a conversation with another dude about why its okay for women to be shallow but not men.

In this way: We all know almost all girls will not date a guy shorter than them, so why can't guys reject a girl for not having big boobs or ass or is chubby? Why is it not shallow for them but it is for guys to do that?

Updates:
Ok but it is considered much more shallow to reject a girl for that than a girl reject a guy for height...

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Well who said it wasn't 'shallow'? Guys turn down girls all the time, of whether it's because their not pretty enough, skinny enough, no ass, boobs, they only want to date a certain race, they have to do this do that. In the end, guys are far more superficial.

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    • You know that its not considered nearly as shallow.. Especially according to this sight...

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    • Ok, but it goes both ways too. It's not just women, it's men too. You know why divorce rates are so high? Because men are cheating! Their f***ing with other women, not being faithful. Yea, guys aren't perfect, and neither are women. But everyone should know right from wrong.Yes, women are shallow too, but generally it seems that men are. And yes, everyone has their own preferences, but I think it's been taken to extremes. Guys seem to be extremely picky in who they want or need in a partner.

    • They have this picture or ideal image of what they want, which isn't practical nor realistic.

What Girls Said 13

  • I don't think it is a double standard. Guys are perfectly welcome to date women that adhere to their sexual preferences, as are women.

    Furthermore, most men won't date a woman taller than them, anyway.

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    • Oh yes they would... I know guys who are 5'8 and drool on 5'10+ girls.

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    • Wow...you're just as tall as me (without heels)! :-P

    • Yuh huh :) With heels on I'm Amazonian lol

  • It's perfectly acceptable for a guy to reject a girl for not having big boobs, no ass or for being chubby.

    However, male or female, rarely does anyone outright say why they're rejecting someone

    And I find it more acceptable of males to be shallow or superficial, and when women admit to standards or preferences, it's the end all and women are just the most shallow thing to hit the face of the earth.

    And its really only shallow in the minds of the girls with those qualities

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    • Women are raised to be "nice" we can never ever be mean. The moment we're even a little mean, its the end of the world. ONE preference= OMG SO SHALLOW. Whereas guys can reject AND make women feel like sh*t about being chubby, lacking a pretty face, having frizzy hair, for being too confident in her looks, and yes-- even being too tall.

      You know, women should totally not have standards. Like ever. Under any circumstances! We should really learn to wait for a man to claim us!

    • What? Not true. You're all shallow, it's just that women are trained to not express those preferences.

    • We shouldn't have standards! we should accept whatever comes our way, JUST so we don't hurt anyones feelings

  • Wait, so are you saying preferences and standards are shallow, double standards?

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    • nope if I said I don't want a girl because she is fat even though she is nice and what not, I would get an essay of whinning of why I am such a pig.

    • and aren't girls now getting essays from guys explaining why they are pigs? did you just conveniently not realize it?

  • I don't think its shallow to want someone who is in the same shape as you are. I take care of myself and I want someone who takes care of himself as well- that's not shallow. I'm also really short so Its hard to date someone short than me.

    Rejecting for for height and for looks are equally shallow though, there isn't one over the other. I recognize that I probably get turned down for looks, just like I turn down guys for looks. It happens.

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  • Well not every girl rejects guys for being short but I reckon its rude for rejecting a girl because she is chubby , or doesn't have a big ass or boobs it isn't her fault she is like that it comes from her genes but I know if I guy did that to Me I wouldn't care but most girls take it to the heart just saying but that's my opinion.

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  • men do deny women for not being their type lol. both men and women do it

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    • @update: no its what the male and female prefer! there is nothing wrong with turning someone down because you don't like what you want

    • its meant to say there is nothing wrong with turning someone down for not meeting what you want in a partner

    • Idk I can't really agree on that..

  • Everyone has preferences.

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    • Yea so what's right and wrong?

    • I don't see it as right or wrong, shallow or easy. It's just choices people make.

    • @update -- no, I don't think it's more shallow.

      Look, if a woman is seeking her future husband she'll likely want him to be tall and a certain race so that her children grow up the same. All that aside, women generally find taller men more masculine, is all. That's not necessarily true -- eg. the kung fu expert who's only 5'5" but can put down a man over 6' tall.

  • Both are shallow and both are just prefernces. You should be able to reject who ever you want and not need a reason because in actuality all reasons are shallow. You either want to be with someone or you don't. No need to dance around it.

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  • I don't think height and those physical features can fairly be compared. I think it's more of a fair comparison to say that a girl can reject a guy for height and a guy can reject a girl for her weight.

    Not the other factors.

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    • I thibk they are comparable..

      Height= Masculinity

      Boobs + donk= Feminity?

    • Last I checked, someone can't simply make themselves taller by exercising more (or doing ANYTHING, for that matter). The same cannot be said of someone losing weight...

  • Tall model girls are supossed to be hot and short guys are cute

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  • Because a girl doesn't want a guy to be of a smaller stature then herself, given that males are looked upon to be strong, a protector and provider.

    A girl with a little less boob fat and ass is still feminine. It doesn't take away from her 'role' as such, or those nurturing looks.

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    • And then really, if you're talking about girls dating shorter guys, it's the same as guys dating taller girls. You can't tell us that the majority of guys want a girl who is taller than them.

    • Lol 'role'. This is assuming you don't believe in feminism which if that is the case, I may end up pulling out some kitchen jokes.

    • than*

  • Well neither gender is justified for rejecting anyone because of their appearance. If they do then they weren't worth the effort in the first place. :u

    I don't think it matters that a future mother wants her kids to look a certain way or that she wants a man with certain aspects that will make her look good or 'feel good' and same for the opposite gender.

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  • Preferences vs ultimatums. The question is, if it's an ultimatum are you taking it too far?...Initially I thought Boobs and ass vs Height was fair. However thinking about it I would say a woman;s waist to hip ratio was more comparable to a man's height.

    - Taller men appear more masculine as they usually have a larger frame

    - Women with a smaller waist to hip ratios appear more feminine. Similarly your waist to hip ratio (like height) can effect the appearance of your whole frame.

    - When a guy is smaller he tends to also have a smaller looking frame making him appear more feminine (or at least less masculine than a taller guy).

    - A woman with no hips appears more masculine.

    As for chubbyness in women, I feel that is the equivalent of a a guy being particularly thin(without muscle since some women like thin men, and some men like chubby women. Fat vs fat for both sexes.

    I'm just making an argument really I have more standards for a guy than just his height (broad shouldered, defined jaw line etc.) so really I think it's equally shallow for a guy to reject a girl on those terms.

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    • So far this is the most relevant answer I've seen given. Hip/waist ratio is a good comparison because its not really something that can be changed, at least not completely. But I have 2 things to say about that. 1. By adjusting her diet and exercise a girl can alter her waist, just not her hips. Also the variance between this ratio from girl to girl (assuming they have a similar BMI) is very small and almost unnoticeable, unlike when dealing with a persons height which varies a lot.

    • Waist cannot always be altered. I'm healthy and work out all the time and still have a large waist to hip ratio.

    • It can be altered, but not enough to be significant. That's comparable to a man wearing thinker soled shoes.

What Guys Said 8

  • I understand people having preferences but I agree that height is one of those few things that Women are pickier about than they should be and that I personally don't understand how it effects the attractiveness of a person. Then again I'm a guy so I'll give you the later one.

    Almost everything that guys put a decent weighting on when determining a girls physical attractiveness can be changed, aside from the face, but that isn't unique to the female gender, so we're both in the same boat on that one.

    Boobs, weight, clothing, hair, ass, hip/waist ratio, can all be altered to some extent. Boobs and waist being the slight exceptions. Weight can easily be changed so I have no sympathy for women who complain about not getting guys when they are overweight. Clothing, easily changed, nuff said. Hair, go to a salon, grab a comb, etc. its easy. Hip/waist, work out and you can slim your waist to match your desired hip/waste ratio. Boobs, go sort of hand in hand with weight. Granted surgery is really the only way to fully adjust breast size, so I'll give you that, but at least the surgery for a boob job is a quarter of the price of height surgery, far less painful, and has a recovery time that is 10 fold shorter than height surgery. And at the end of the day, no guys has ever turned a girl down simply because her boobs were too small or too big. A women turning a guy down because of his height has definitely happened. I mean, they don't give us breast size a search filter on dating sites for a reason.

    Men do take into account height of a women, but we have simple demands. Usually we just won't date a girl taller than us, other than that we don't care. If we're 5'8, it doesn't matter if she's 5'8, 5'7, 5'4, 4'10, whatever it doesn't make a difference. But just go on a dating site and you can see women as short as 5'1 saying they require their date to be 5'10 or some stupid crap like that. So even though women say they just want a guy who is taller than them, many women still take it a step further and simply require the to be "tall", not just "taller", than them.

    FYI ladies, if you think height is a determinate of masculinity, you are sadly mistaken. I know many tall men who are as feminine and masculine as they come, who would also get their ass kicked in about 2seconds by someone half their size. If you are concerned about size, power and masculinity, then look at his muscles, not his height. It's a more accurate indicator of his masculinity and ability to protect you and is also far less shallow. Judge me all day for my muscles if you want, because I know I can also go to the gym to alter them.

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  • Because height is something a guy can choose but having terrible boobs or a terrible ass isn't the girl's fault! -Sarcasm-

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    • Lol I was like wtf until I saw sarcasm ha

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    • I think simple-minded people see" terrible" and auto-assume that it's something negative.

      Basically, being short is no much more the guy's fault than having a bad body is a girl's. That was the message I meant to convey.

    • I didn't assume it was negative. Just didn't understand it. Was rather a stupid sarcasm joke, but I guess I understand it now.

  • I'm short and I know exactly what you mean. Idgaf, if they get to reject me for my genetics, I can reject them for being fat slobs.

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    • if you don't like fat chicks you don't like fat chicks, but your statement sounds a little sour. its like you're rejecting them to prove some sort of point lol which is pretty immature... but I think I know what you are saying!

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    • lol so you're doing it out of spite to prove a point? nvm, thought I could relate but I'm not that much of a baby.

    • There's nothing spiteful about it, you're just putting pieces together that aren't even there. All I'm saying is that I don't want fat chicks that's all, just in the way that you don't want short guys. That's all I'm saying.

  • There ISN'T anything wrong with a guy rejecting a girl because she doesn't have boobs or an ass that are/is attractive to him. Just like how there isn't anything wrong with a girl who rejects a guy because he isn't tall enough (and I say that as a guy on the shorter side). You like what you like and that's just how life goes sometimes.

    Also, women get rejected for being taller than guys, as well. I'd guess that it happens less (since men mostly just want their girl to be shorter than them whereas girls tend to want their guy to be "x number of inches taller than them), but it definitely does happen.

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  • Pro Tip: It IS shallow of women. Guys CAN reject women for those things. People don't like to seem like sh*tty individuals so they disguise the word "shallow" with "preferences".

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    • I agree

      They change preferences to shallow or superficial

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    • @peace.love.couture, I never labeled "an entire gender", if you're referring to my saying "it IS shallow of women" then to the women it applies to. The whole preference thing is talking about people being shallow but calling something else, Don't misunderstand and think I'm saying all women who have preferences are actually shallow.

    • No, I was just using that as an example because of what the question is

  • Both should stick to dating people they find attractive.

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  • Ohhhhhh sweet hipocracy...

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  • What you said is wrong. We can (!) turn down girls who are not hot. Who said we can't?

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