To Offend, or NOT to Offend

[Anonymous]

Where do I start! So, I am an asl (american sign language) one student in college. I decided to try something new...since I already knew Spanish. A couple weeks and a lot of help from a friend who knew the ropes in ASL and I found myself having fluid conversations with my friend constantly. It felt awesome knowing a new language...I felt happy that I finally knew a language that for the most part...was uncommonly seen.

Anyways, one of our more frequent assignments were to attend DEAF EVENTS...lord, I was nervous. I felt like I could shit bricks. I was a newbie...I knew next to nothing! But I went, with encouragement from my friend who said I would be fine, we went....

It was fun, and I was nervous at first...but quickly started a conversation with a deaf man who encouraged me to not be nervous, and that the deaf community was very open to teaching beginners, and that they were patient! It was awesome to learn.

A couple of months later, we had to attend a second event. This one was the one I felt prepared for...it was one of those things that I felt confident enough in that I could easily have a simple conversation with a deaf person, as well as demonstrate how much I have learned. It was great!

Until I got there....there was ONE, HEARING, INTERPRETER. She was rude as all fuck. I was having trouble understanding another deaf man, and kept asking him to repeat, but slower. After almost 3 attempts, he gave up on me and walked away. Then, I started up a verbal conversation, as well as simultaneously signing and finger spelling every other word of our conversation, trying to be considerate to the deaf people around trying to join the conversation. We were talking, and signing with the other ASL students when the interpreter came up and literally started talking shit about myself and the other students. She signed the following: "You guys are all rude, how dare you voice at this event. You need to sign, voicing is disrespectful. *turns to guy that got irritated with me* Aren't they just ridiculous?!" The other deaf man agreed, and they walked away continuing to talk down to the new students learning the new language. I learned from this experience that when learning a new language, you need to be considerate at all times...both the person who is fluent in the language and the person who is learning the language. It is not right to bash the other person for his or her innability to speak with fluidity or without fault. If there are any deaf people reading this, and wondering what I did wrong, please try and understand that while I was voicing, I was fingerspelling, and signing as many words as I could, as fast as I could...trying to be considerate. If you ever see an interpreter bashing an ASL student, you should stop them...as this will encourage the student to feel UNWELCOME in the community they are trying to share with you.

TO OFFEND....OR NOT TO OFFEND. Choose wisely!

[fiego]

For starters, I'm impressed you are picking up the language. The interpreter definitely should have been more open to the fact that you are picking up a new language and not have been so harsh on you. If she really cared about the community she would try to foster learning and encourage more people to learn the language.

[myTake Owner]

Thanks, I thought it would be enriching for me to pick up something new. I'm very interested on learning all sorts of languages. The interpreter should have been nicer... I just hope I never run into someone like that ever again at an event!

[RationalLioness]

LOL. I would have approached her and used my voice while signing: "I can talk to other people who can talk if I WANT to. I'm signing as well so you two need to stop being idiots".

... We would have got kicked out if we were together... lol. I can't stand rudeness when it happens for NO reason.

[myTake Owner]

I know! My friend, who is like a sister to me, I love that girl to death, was... has a complete opposite personality than myself! Lol! I'm positive we would have tore some shit up if you were with me. My friend is usually the voice that calms me down. If she hadn't had been there, I probably would have told her and the other man off. BEYOND RUDENESS!

[BeeNee]

I am in the process now of furthering my sign language education. I started as a kid taking summer courses, and now am trying to pick it back up as an adult. As I'm sure maybe you are aware of already, the Deaf Community, at least in my view, is split into two camps. One believes hearing people should stick with their own and let the deaf community do their own thing and then you have the other camp who firmly believes that the two should learn how to communicate and interact with one another. Hearing people tend to do pretty dumb stuff like shouting at the deaf, or making nonsensical signs to make fun of them, and worse. A lot of them have been burned and hurt (though that's not your fault, but happens enough to a person, the scars and anger begin to set). Couple that with a world that has largely left them in the dark in many respects. So for those in the first camp, they are already primed to fail you rather then offer any sort of kind word or correction as you attempt to learn which is ironic because you ARE actually trying to learn their language on their turf, to communicate with them! Unfortunately what you are experiencing is not unique to just sign. In every language and with every people, there are those that are patient and helpful saints. When you find them, stick by them on your journey. They recognize just how hard it is to be on that other side of not knowing and trying to learn. Do know, as nasty as this may sound, that it is not the job of every deaf person to help you or adapt to you in the same way sooo many hearing people wouldn't bother with trying to sign or communicate with the deaf. Not every one cares, has the time, or the patience to help you, and you're going to have to be okay with that and seek out those that do care. If the event was one where your voice was not supposed to be used, and you knew this, then it was appropriate for the interpreter to call you out on this, and no matter how difficult, to only use sign. HOWEVER, everything else beyond that was completely uncalled for as it has nothing to do with the rules of the event nor was it constructive criticism.

[Anonymous]

Really good take