Losing someone is a life changing, terrible experience.
I lost my father to an accident. It has been almost 3 years since he passed. It was just an ordinary day till it got that call from my mom….I never gonna forget this day, the most terrible day of my life. It has changed me in different ways.
I cannot imagine how I have gone these years without talking to my father. Though we both aren’t talkers.
Everyone handles a lost of loveone different but maybe this will help.
1. Give Yourself Grace
Grief is a process, not a state.– Anne Grant
The thing about grief is that it’s a roller coaster – it’s up, it’s down. The emotions sometimes take over. – Brent Sexton
There is no formula to grief. Allow yourself to feel the way you feel. Grief has a mind of its own.
2. Listen To Advice
Deep grief sometimes is almost like a specific location, a coordinate on a map of time. When you are standing in that forest of sorrow, you cannot imagine that you could ever find your way to a better place. But if someone can assure you that they themselves have stood in that same place, and now have moved on, sometimes this will bring hope.
― Elizabeth Gilbert
If you have people around you who has experienced the same then learn from them. Listen to their advice, what they tell you can be just the thing you needed to hear. But most of all allow them to comfort you, to be there for you.
3. Don’t Listen To Advice
But there is a discomfort that surrounds grief. It makes even the most well-intentioned people unsure of what to say. And so many of the freshly bereaved end up feeling even more alone.– Meghan O’Rourke
Like said before it’s good to listen to advice from others around us but at the same time it isn’t. Some people tell to someone grieving the most unbelievable things, which doesn’t help us at all but hurt us.
We all are different and so we also grieve on our own way. What people tell us can be very helpful at times but sometimes not at all. Take what you need and leave the rest behind.
Our dead are never dead to us, until we have forgotten them. George Eliot
Don’t be afraid to remember your loved one. The memories you have will be precious to you for the rest of your life.
It is never as good as having our loved one right next to us, but it is much better than no trace of our loved one having ever existed. It is good to remember. One day those memories may bring smiles without tears.
5. Befriend Grief
There is a sacredness in tears. They are not the mark of weakness, but of power. They speak more eloquently than ten thousand tongues. They are the messengers of overwhelming grief, of deep contrition, and of unspeakable love.– Washington Irving
The price we pray for love is called grief. Only through the pain we can reach the other side. It is good to cry.
6. Hold On To Hope
The reality is that you will grieve forever. You will not ‘get over’ the loss of a loved one; you will learn to live with it. You will heal and you will rebuild yourself around the loss you have suffered. You will be whole again but you will never be the same. Nor should you be the same nor would you want to.
― Elisabeth Kübler-Ross
The loss of the loved one will be like a tattoo forever on your heart. Grief, however, is not forever. My heart will always and forever have a bruise.
It will be hard but your heart will heal. Don’t feel pressure to move on, but know that you will one day.
When I think of him I smile and laugh. I will never forget my dad. I will carry my dad’s life and tragic death with me in my heart.
Grief is not without hope. Hold on to hope.