I have the same issue in that I dont fit in. Im sure that going to come up a lot here. But see its about being comfortable in your own skin and being yourself. Human beings are social creatures we are wired to find solace in the company of others. When you keep yourself separated from the world is going to take its toll on you long run. Also you are going to have social issues as time goes on, and not be able to talk to others, even in a professional sense.
In my opinion you need to look to meet new people, but also keep an eye out for people who are not quality people. I have very few real friends. I know a lot of people. The difference is if I see someone I know Ill say hi and chat, but not really spend time with them. My friends I spend time with them when I can and we keep up with each other, watch out for each other because thats what friends do.
See the generalization that people suck and people are stupid are just that. As a group people are pretty dumb, however its the individuals that make it worth it. The people who are who they say they are, the ones that go out of their way for others for no other reason than they care. its hard to find real people, you run into a lot of people who claim to be real, but they are really not anything but some character they play to hide who they are.
If you want to meet people of like mind you can try hobby groups, or reading clubs. Places where you can socialize and keep it rather limited. I dont get buddy buddy with coworkers because if something goes south then you have to deal with that at work. I keep my social life and work life separate. But joining groups that have shared likes and such help you meet people. Though you do have to interact with them. Which is the point of it all. Sating your want to socialize and not be lonely but keeping people at arms length.
Yeah I can relate. I'm really introverted and have social anxiety so even though I feel alone I feel safer when I'm by myself. It's not really something I think you can just willfully change over night. Like if you don't feel motivated to interact with others you just don't. Motivation I think I a feeling not a choice. So I don't really know what the reasons are for why you feel the way you do, they might be different than mine, but I think you need to search within yourself to find the root causes and gradually work on them.
This is the worst feeling in the world. I am in this living hell as we speak.
What helped me was to FORCE myself to socialize. I hated it. It was so hard. But eventually I got so lonely I had no other choice.
Want to be alone. But lonely... We need people. We really do. We need interaction. My depression has lifted since.
I can really relate... since i can't seem to make or keep friends... or any other type of relationship
so i wrestle with that question daily... i can't really help you but i'm definitely following this question to see if anyone else has a good answer :)
Yes I just think about random things and play games etc or pray
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yep I know that feeling, But I have never really fit in, so I don't know if I really care anymore. I learned that I had shitty friends and dropped them. I have a few friends from work, they are two girls, it can be a bit awkward as I am not used to doing things that they do like socialize lol. but I am also like that around my family, I think it not only has to do with not wanting to talk, but not having anything to relate to, unless we're doing that activity or whatever. I hate talking about work or my future, I have always hated talking about that because I don't know what to do with it, so I stay away from that. even though they force me to talk about it and we fight, they don't want me to do the things I need to do.
so I think that after a while, you just learn to forget about people and it becomes easier, you can learn to go out yourself, it just depends if you have the will power, also I could see how that might be frightening though as going to places without people can be seen as weird (but you have to put that out of your mind) and just go) I think if you go to a public place that isn't in a creepy area and don't stay out too late you can be safe. or if you want to go to a concert by yourself (I have done many times now... it's actually more fun).
I tink you just have to try to get away from humans for a while to see if you really actually like it. and if you don't then you slowly make some friends and get back into the social thing
It sounds to me that u haven't found something interesting to talk about with others. Perhaps it's always the same old conversations and you got sick of it.
Next time you talk with your friends try bringing up a conversation that you find appealing. Something that you truly have a desire to talk about and not just the ordinary, mundane conversations like what u did today at school or what movie you like. Find something you do not usually talk about and see how it goes.
It could also be the people you talk with. Do you generally talk to girls or guys? It's always more exciting to chat with the opposite sex. People always have an inclination to do so because of... I don't know hormones? Attraction? Haha. It's always in the back of our heads that something could happen with them, whereas with the same sex you know generally that you won't be doing anything sexual with them.
It's impossible for us to know why you don't want to talk with anyone. We can only conjure up guesses and make suggestions for you. I think you really have to ask yourself this question and figure it out. It can come with time as it usually heals all wounds.
Hope this helps. Good luck.
Can I ask why you don't want to talk to people? Is it that you don't like talking about yourself or don't like people in general? Are you a shy person or depressed?
You could always play video games with other people. It's a good way to interact without interacting very much lol. It can take your mind off things. A more social activity is playing boardgames or cardgames. You get to play and interact with people who share a common passion so it's easy to make friends. But at the same time you don't have to be super "social" since you're all just having fun.
Do you have friends to talk to and have fun with? If you do have friends then I assume it's a different kind of loneliness? Like do you wish you had a boyfriend or do you wish you had more friends? Or do you wish your friends/boyfriend had more free time for you?
You could get a part time job interacting with the public. You could even volunteer. I think small amounts of interaction in doses might be best so you can relax and recharge by yourself. If you did that you might also feel like you're helping people which I think most of us enjoy. You could join a club that meets once a week or so. There are lots out there. I'd like to see you around some positive people that can lift you up and show a contrast to the darker side of humanity (so you can learn to tune negativity out). I would totally hang out with you if we could. There's good in everyone and you're so pretty to not enjoy guys. You'll get there though.
Perhaps try to send messages to some people you trust, about how you feel... it may provide some support and help you overcome the problem.
Could it be because of things that have happened in the past? For example you wanted to learn to know people and it went wrong every time?
After 5 failed attempts you could get a feeling like "abandon ship, it's not worth the effort".
Come on, head up and do something you like to. It will make you feel better and than the next step is talking to people. Won't be easy but... try and if it doesn't work try again!
I have been having such a feeling for the past 3 years to say the least. At first, I didn't know what to do. Then i realized that it was not that I didn't want to talk to people. It was actually that I didn't want to talk to my friends or family or people living in my neighbour hood. And that means that i wouldn't mind talking to a complete stranger. So i started going to parks or libraries where people often are alone and started to talk to strangers. And it felt wonderful. Especially with old people who brought their grandchildren in the park to play. They will share such amazing stories from their lives that we start to feel that we haven't gone through even 1% of the bullshit that we are gonna face ahead. It also makes us realize that we haven't even lived our life to 10% of what we could do and we coukd do much more with our life. It brings new energy, it makes us think more about us and less about the people around us. Trust me, you'll feel to go out there and rock the world ;)
I think I've felt that way a few times in life but I mean now I think im all good. i still get pretty lonely at times but its whatevs bruh. the sun is shining on the other side.
when i used to feel like that? tried to make plans to socialize with people. but then again most of my friends are in a relationship so its just me lol. i will eat pizza and watch Netflix or just ride my motorcycle for like 2 hours. maybe even hit the gym.
it always helps to have someone to talk to that you can relate with. i have some penpals i very much enjoy.
not as bad as you describe but I do have limits on how often I can socialize so I make myself hang out with family and people when I'm very lonely but when I've had enough of others I politely state I'm going back to my room.
you might be able to play a few games like The Sims or Sim City with people in them to help you not be as lonely. just remember they aren't real.
Lol, in general I'm not too outgoing, but when I get lonely I do seek out interactions with humans.
You should try the app MeetUp, I just got it, its like a app for clubs in your area. Like beer drinkers, 20 somethings, bike riders, etc etc.
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^^^ You and me! ;)
I felt like it once, generally it helps me to to talk to people anyway or just wait it out.
And remember even if you don't like to talk, hugs don't need words :)
sometimes i feel like that. in workday i see lots of people and friends all of the people i know like me but sometimes i'm getting tired of people and i want to take a rest from being social. i want to be myself a little, listen myself, reset my mind etc... but that makes me feel lonely easily and i start to be social again as usual. these kind of things are the up and down lines of the life i think.
You mean you want to be near people, but not actually talk with them?
well, i think you are kinda classy of arrogant. solution= take a walk and keep smilling while walking the street
Yup, which is probably why I spend way too much time on the internet.
Which is funny in itself, because, most of the time on the internet you're interacting with other people anyway.
I think I said what I do about it though (hint: fuck it!) :D
Well some of us are born loners, we prefer our own company, we need someone to come along and intrigue us, make our minds tick,
yep... sometime I'd get ice cream and watch some new movie or animation or something or just put my headphone and listen to music or better get my bicycle and go around
Travel.. in new surroundings, you will meet DIFFERENT people, and there's no avoiding meeting people when traveling!
> Does anyone feel like this sometimes?
No, I feel like that all the time
that's a bit of a catch 22.. hmm
well, i suppose you could drown yourself in your work or hobbies.
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