I have stretch marks/imperfect skin along my body. Am I undateable?

Question

So i've never done one of these before, but here's my go at it.

I am really insecure about my legs because i have huge pores and they are visibly red but mostly just a little darker brown than my skin. So i never ever wear shorts or a dress without tights. The times i have exposed them, people tend to stare. I also have noticeable stretch marks on my hips. So i'm always afraid that if i expose them to anyone, especially my significant other, they will be completely turned off from me because it makes me look worse physically. I have clear skin on my face and am constantly told how attractive i am (with clothes on). I'm just way too afraid to really expose my body. What should i do? I've been embarrassed all my life but i don't want to be when i date someone. I am currently in college and want to meet someone accepting of my body but i don't know if i should just bring it up and be confident or hide away forever lol

Not very well worded, but you guys get the point.

Any advice and or comments are welcome.

AshTheAsh · Accepted Answer

Firstly, lets clear up one thing, I'm a guy and i too have stretch marks and I know how you feel, on some level at least, as i too never wanted to be seen without clothes on, it was so bad i avoided any form of activity which involved undressing or even something which meant my top could accidentally slip up i avoided. But the fact of the matter is, Stretch marks are often the result of the rapid stretching of the skin associated with rapid growth, meaning every single person gets them, every single one.. just some are more visible than others due to skin pigmentation and severity of growth. so all these emotions running through you i wouldn't worry to much, because a lot of other people also feel the way you do. Secondly, stretchmarks are literally the last thing on anyone's mind when they are either in love or just all heated up in the moment, so getting undressed wouldn't make them see you as unattractive or lose interest but instead it would more than likely form a solid bond between you.
I still feel conscious about undressing around people, but the one person i don't have a problem with doing it in front of anymore is my girlfriend because she accepted me for who i am and i told her how i felt about my marks and she hugged me and told me she didn't care at all. so when you love someone or you feel very very strongly about someone, none of this should matter, they accept you as you come :)
p. s sorry about the large paragraph, i just feel strongly about the issue.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Let's see... You have a cute face, an amazing smile, and nice hair. You're very attractive.. And almost everyone has stretchmarks somewhere on their body. If stretch marks are enough to make a guy not want to date you, then he's not the kind you would wanna date in the first place. As for the redness of the pores.. Once again, if a guy can't accept you for these flaws then he's not the kind of guy you wanna be with. I understand your insecurity because of these things, but don't let your insecurities run your life. For all you know, the guy that you end up falling for could be just as insecure about something on his body. Maybe too much body hair, or no body hair.. or maybe he has acne on his chest and back.. Or maybe he has redness on his legs like you. You just never know.

bijinbijinbijin · Accepted Answer

no you are not undateable. I am currently engaged and i have stretch marks and a littl bit of sagging skin becasue at one time i gained a whole bunch of weight and then lost it. My fiance loves every bit of my body.

Yes guys are superficial but most of the time women notice imperfections on themselves that the guys do not even see. When guys falll in love they tend to see you the same way as they did when they first met you. If a guy thinks you are super beautiful when he first meets you and in his head has declared you as fuckable you can walk around with your hair messy and in sweat pants and the guy will still be attracted to you.
I recently gained 10lbs becasue i got off of my diet and my fiance did not notice. I even asked him if i looked a little bigger and he said he couldnt tell, but my grandma noticed right way and then she asked me if i was pregnant and my fiance was really shocked when she said that because he really did not notice. 10lbs really isn't that significant but i definitely noticed it.

When you are in love, or even just infatuated with a person, you really do not notice thoes type of imperfections. Its one of the reasons why people say "Love is blind"

Creole_Flavor · Accepted Answer

I went on a date the other night and I talked about some of things I didn't like about my body. The guy of course looked at me like I was crazy he loved what he saw. I mainly was speaking of things that were not visible like scars. At some point he wanted to see the scars and I showed him he was not worried about them and I genuinely feel like he wasn't saying it to make me feel good. I still think they look bad but I'm not so worried about how a guy would feel about them. Sometimes we obsess too much. I'm still datable because i'm human i'm not perfect outside or inside so of course you are datable too.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

I have a few big scars and dated a guy that wanted to touch them he said scars are a lot like tattoos (he had 13) they make the body more interesting he said pretty much the same thing about my strech marks (imma mom so i gots em lol) but really he was right things like that tell the story of your life even if its something as simple as i got older they dont mean anything more than that hell we actually had a few conversations where we would talk about how we got or at least thought we got different imperfections it made for some hella interesting conversation and does wonders for body image

sammy_31 · Accepted Answer

Of course it sick to hear people say I don't date you if you have blah, blah, blah natural "flaws" that shouldn't be flaws at all. I can't stand aholes who set those standards it is not real we are human and imperfect but perfect as our own self at the same time. Front worry girl we all think this but all have our issues that really aren't that big of a deal.

Rawrzz · Answer

No one cares as long as you have a vagina. Well, basically. Other things are important, too, but really the vagina is the most important. :P Slightly kidding. It's no big deal. I won't say that some guys won't be turned off, but I don't think most would mind. Just be glad you have good teethe.

I wouldn't recommend that to anyone. Don't go too far to hide your flaws, but you sure as hell shouldn't put them out in the open for people. If a guy has been with you for awhile, he's emotionally attatched and whatever flaws you have will mean a lot less. Well, until later.

Athleticbroo · Answer

Really? You guys gotta stop finding insecurities in everything. Noone cares that much and no noone is gonna notice it until you make em

one12oh6 · Answer

Theyre like scratches on a car... they add character. No one else in the entire world has those exact stretch marks. I personally think stretch marks on the hips are hot but, I like wide hips, thick legs/calves and large butts. And no... Im not a Steve Buschemi looking weirdo. Just a man who knows what he appreciates in life. I doubt you'll have a hard time finding another guy like me... best of luck and Godbless

red324 · Answer

Go see a dermatologist and see what they can do. I know they make creams for stretch marks, cause pregnant women always complain about that. Maybe you could try some lotion on your legs to close up your pores? Your skin tone is beautiful. You must be Hispanic. Hispanic girls are beautiful:)

lumos · Answer

Nobody's skin is perfect. And honestly I doubt that people stare. As harsh as it sounds, they probably don't give a fuck about your imperfections. They're too occupied with worrying about their own.

DhruvSinghania · Answer

You seriously think that matters? i don't think so.. Stop being tensed and enjoy life.. You are beautiful.. :)

rUinSAYAN · Answer

as long as you are pleasant to look from outer appearance you will be able to get dates (chances are high). don't confuse it, I didn't mean it personally but globally.

Ihav2fart · Answer

Everyone has their flaws, nobody is perfect. If a guy doesn't want to date you because of those things then he isn't worth your time anyways. Someone who truly cares about you will look past that.

Klaatu51 · Answer

don't worry stretch-marks mean nothing basically LOL

Tractorbeam · Answer

It won't matter at all. If you look good dressed, he'll still be happy to see you naked.

mhaaa · Answer

just use derma-roller for your stretch marks  and NO they are not gross

Anonymous · Answer

If I was a guy, I wouldn't give a fuck. Everybody has their imperfections. Stretch marks aren't gross, or un clean. They are just marks. Hopefully he does't date you for your body, but for the person you are.

LovesTVDx · Answer

Have you tried bio oil? You're gorgeous so I doubt that would distract from your beauty :)

SnowHearth · Answer

Don't listen to them.

I have stretch marks/imperfect skin along my body. Am I undateable?

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