HELP! My boyfriend opened my purse to get my phone, checked my messages behind my back! I never cheated on him

[Anonymous]

was talking to this guy (asking advice about my bf), AND this guy likes me and says I'm beautiful and I should visit him, and says lots of bad things about my boyfriend, trying to separate us, so I'd be with him... and even though my boyfriend didn't read all the conversation, he kept saying what kind of man is that that tries to take another's man's girl, bla bla bla...

Also he is pissed because he's with some problems at court/justice, and my friend insisted and I gave my bf's information so he could check what was going on BECAUSE my boyfriend wasn't telling me the whole story.

I GOT MAD that he checked my phone AND opened my purse behind my back, he had NO RIGHT... We were at a party earlier that day and we had small discussions there, nothing serious, and I was texting this friend of mine there sometimes, AND I THINK his friend saw some messages (he was next to me..but I didn't realize at that moment), SO when I confronted him, WHY he did that, he said '''ohh my friend called me and told me I should check your phone, he's my best friend so I did'''...pathetic I know... WHAT AN EXCUSE!

Obviously, he got mad at me because of the messages he read, and I asked ''R you GOING TO LEAVE ME? And he said he needed to THINK ABOUT IT, but I was at his home (I'm from another city and am always at his house (he lives alone) during weekends... So I was at his home, and he still slept holding me after talking for hours...the next day he said he would not leave me, but he needed space and time to think better, cause he couldn't pretend nothing happened, I agreed!

He's been cold now, which I think it's NORMAL... what should I do? We are still together, but he is too cold... should I give him space, or what? Should I respect his moment now?

Dont you think he was wrong for checking my phone? And what I did was really wrong? Would you forgive me guys?

TOO LONG Q, BUT REALLY IMPORTANT TO ME, PLS READ, NEED HELP! TKS, I'LL CHOOSE BEST ANSWER.

Updates

+1 y

ALSO, HE GOT MAD BECAUSE AT SOME POINT, I SAID TO MY FRIEND ''I THINK I LIKE YOU :( '' AND HE KEPT REPEATING, YOU SAID YOU LIKE HIM, I CANT TRUST YOU

[Raiden]

"I THINK I LIKE YOU"? wow, and you think he is the bad guy? you would have cheated (or already have) if he didn;t do what he did (well done to him)...you are in the wrong cos' if he didn;t care he wouldn;t check on you...besides some guys test their girl to see if she is worthy of a long-term.

Listen nothing is worse than keep thinking what your partner is upto after you find out they like someone else. So don;t expect him to care as much as he generally did before you got busted. How can he trust you?

I read something funny today in the train (newspaper) the heading said something like "if you are going to cheat then careful which hotel you pick"...a husband was cheating on his wife in a hotel at the same time and day his wife was cheating on him and they happen to runn into each other in the hotel ...loool

So listen its your fault for swinging with other guys when you have a boyfriend and you should take it on the chin and accept that you did wrong and delete the other guy (tell him to f*ck off) so he really does. How can you talk to a guy who wants to split up your relationship? would you want your guy to talk to a better looking girl who wants to break up your relationship? Anyways he had the right to check on you as much as you do.

[EPhantom]

He really shouldn't have checked your phone... but to be honest I am not surprised in the least bit. Us guys are VERY territorial, we don't even like it when another guy is thinking about our woman, let alone trying to break up our relationship and steal her from us.

Personally, I suggest that you tell your "friend" that he needs to back off with all the romantic sh*t and that you're already taken. If he can't accept that fact and just be a friend, then he is going to be seen as an enemy, and only an enemy, in your mans eyes.

You did not do anything wrong by being upset with him for checking your phone... but continuing to talk with someone that is consistently trying to break up your relationship is bad. You're keeping something very dangerous in your pocket by not making him back off.

Imagine how you would feel if your man was talking with some girl that wanted him, and that was constantly trying to break you two up. And on top of that, he isn't stopping her from trying.

Forgiveness... in my eyes is something that needs to be earned, not simply given =/ I suggest confronting your "friend" about this and getting him to back down, and doing something really special for your man to help him realize that you truly are all his.

[beerY33]

I don't think it's okay for SOs to check phones without permission, however, you don't really have any business texting someone who's clearly into you and trying to split up your relationship, so I think it's more than legitimate for your boyfriend to be mad.

You just have to decide what's more important: your relationship with your boyfriend or this other guy, and whether you think him checking your phone is forgivable if you talking to the other guy is.

Of course this is all subjective, and I can't tell you how the situation will play out for you and your boyfriend, but if I were you, I would apologize for letting that situation with the other guy play out as it did, but let the boyfriend know that I'm not okay with him checking my phone without permission. Personally, I think his fault is lesser than yours- while he shouldn't have checked your phone, you really shouldn't have had anything on there for him to take issue with. I would forgive him and hope that he saw fit to forgive me.

[Briiiiie]

Well you have to ask yourself the truth...do you like/love him? If so you have to sit down with him and swear on your life you will stop talking to other guys. You need to tel him how much you do like/love him and you'll do anything to fix this. Next delete the guys numbers that he is mad about. If he truly means a lot to you this shouldn't be a problem, because trust me I've been there and made wrong choices...those other guys aren't worth it. But if you don't really have any feelings for your guy then best thing to do is break it off.

[Lett0385]

In my opinion he went to the extreme of checking your phone because you might have a record of talking to guys. You are lucky he didn't break up with you.

I think that now that your Boyfriend will have limited trust in you you should take in consideration being exclusive and stop talking to other guys.

And for the mid time, let him get over it, if he wants to be alone give him his space,

[litlaprincess]

look at it this way : Your best friend told you that you should check your mans phone.. Which I am pretty sure you would do. Then you find out he has been texting this other girl that is trying to ruin your relationship so she can get with him and he tells her that he likes her. Pretty sure you would be pissed too.

[Anonymous]

"I THINK I LIKE YOU :("

Welp, even though it was wrong, it's a good thing that he saw your phone.