Should I accept my ex-girlfriend friend request? Or Leave it?

I ran into my ex-gf two days ago after not seeing or being in contact with her for the past 5 months. It was extremely awkward... seeing how she was at the top of my street. We went for a walk to catch up and I found out she saw my parents in the same spot the week before. She said she was walking from her cousins house which is a few blocks out of the way of my house to get home. There are a lot of different routes she could take but chose this one? 20 mins after I walked her to her house and said our goodbyes (brought back memories) and she said we should meet for a coffee or something, I recived a Facebook friend request. Now I'm stuck in a hole thinking about what to do.

A while back I sent her a message saying that I can't be friends right now and that I'm too emotionally unstable. Then I cut contact for a while. We then met up a few months later, and hit it off for a while saying how sorry she was for breaking up with me and that she still loves me. A few weeks later after non-stop parties and catering to her, I asked her if she even wanted to do this. And after many crying talks she said no. So there's a back ground...

Almost all of my friends and family say to ignore the request. They say its not good to be friends and the fact that I will be able to look at her profile. Meanwhile one of my friends say that I can do it because its been a long enough time and that she wants to see what I'm up to. Or he says dont accept it, but send her a message saying that it hasn't been long enough and that I still have feelings that I'm trying to move past. But at the same time I dont want to break the ice mesaging her first allowing her to feel like she is able to talk to me. I'm really confused with what to do. I dont want to be an asswhole but still do have feelings for her that I dont want to be brought back. I still love and care for her in a sence, but I dont know if I could be anything but in a relatioship with her. And I dont know about going down that path again!


Most Helpful Girl

  • Having an ex on social media would be toxic until you really were over her. You need time to heal if you ever want to actually be friends with her but if you're still hurt don't accept the friend request. A broken heart needs time to heal.

    • Not hurt over the break up anymore, just still have feelings for her. Can't see my self being with her in any circumstance other than a relationship. I shared too much with her and had too deep of a connection mentally and physically to strictly be friends I think. I still care about her, just don't know how/if i should show it without getting my heart broken again. Don't know if being friends on FB will open any doors that shouldn't be open/if shell take it the wrong way.

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What Girls Said 2

  • The only time you should ever accept anything from a ex is if they very clearly tell you they want you back. Till then, no texting, no social media and no meeting up unless they want to discuss the prospects of trying again. Do not settle for any less.

  • Ignore the request because you are thinking about it too much. This means you are not ready. You can have another friend. Just avoid the drama really.


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