Do cheaters deserve second chances?

Question

^ It's all in the question ^

treebellah · Accepted Answer

I think it depends on the situation... some people are players that move from person to person spreading their seed and hurting people. A lot of people cheat because their are other problems in their relationship or something missing. If they kept their mistake from me I would probably dump them- its not something you should find out from someone else. Its embarrassing and hurtful. I would be more likely to forgive someone if they told me soon after and begged for my forgiveness. I would probably want a break from the relationship to see if it is something I can get over, or if we should just call it quits for good. If I were married to the person I would fight for the relationship assuming they were otherwise a good person. Because of my Christian faith and beliefs I am lead to believe my future spouse will be someone God has picked out for me and even if they make mistakes they are potentially the best person for me. I don't think my opinion is worth much being only twenty and never being in the situation. Hopefully its never a decision I will have to make.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

In some, if not most, cases...cheaters usually do it because they were "bored" with the relationship they were in and wanted or were looking for some sort of excitement/thrill. If my boyfriend cheated on me and I caught him or found out, I would not want him back. I wouldn't understand his reasoning for wanting to stay together, if he was so bored with our relationship that he needed to find someone else to make it exciting...why not stay with her?

So I don't give second chances, but it's all a matter on how you see things. I'm not one to willingly risk looking like an idiot as a result of my decisions. What does that say about you if you take back a cheater and they cheat on you again?

xosillygirlxo · Accepted Answer

i believe that there are two types of cheaters: The compulsive cheater, and the one time-mistake cheater. the compulsive cheater will never change and will f*** anything whenever he/she can, the one time-mistake cheater made a mistake and cheated but feels sorry and really won't do it again.

i believe this because I was a one time-mistake cheater, but I have a friend who is a compulsive cheater who f***s who ever when ever he can.

Ephram · Accepted Answer

It depends. If it was a one night thing, like a mistake... then yeah. They deserve a second chance.

But if they were actually having a full-out affair with someone else, and slept with them multiple times, then I wouldn't see the point of giving them a second chance. And it's not because they don't deserve it, but because obviously, if they got together with someone else like that, it means something is seriously wrong in the relationship.

You'd have to be pretty narrow-minded not to give your partner a second chance, just because he/she screwed up one night. It definitely doesn't mean they're gonna do it again, especially not if they were drunk. You have to realize that sometimes, sex is just sex. What really matters in the end, is if they still love you or not.

chocolateboy23 · Accepted Answer

all people have their own reasons why they did cheat. but I do belive that they deserve a second chance but then I don't because it does depend on the situation and it depends on the person. like if he or she cheated on you and your that kind of person who forgives and can actually put it in the past then give them another chance but keep them on thin ice and make them really work to earn your trust. If however they cheat and apologize and you forgive them but they do it again or if they have a tendency to make you feel like he or she could do better and they cheat then just forget about them

saphirasilverwings · Answer

I voted C but I almost voted B and I would probably switch to that. But also maybe not.

To me, they reason why they cheated would be much more of a factor than whether or not they apologized or made promises. I would be wary of someone who thought an apology would suffice in that situation, and a promise could mean nothing. As long as they genuinely cared about our relationship and were willing to try hard to make it work better in the future, I would forgive them.

Dan2287 · Answer

You cheat once and then I can never ever trust you. The appology means nothing - if you truly did care you would be able to avoid these situations. If you want to start dating different people again, then tell me you want to break up instead of keeping me in your life

haileigh-james · Answer

I believe in second chances, but definitely NOT for cheaters. if I'm dating someone and the thought of cheating on me even crosses his mind... then that goes to show that whatever me and him have obviously isn't that serious... so why would I waste my time giving a cheater a second chance when he knows that if he could get away with it the first time that he could more than likely get away with it the second time? more importantly... why would I do that to myself? that's just setting myself up for disappointment.

do me wrong once, shame on you. do me wrong twice, shame on me.

ya see?

Firefly2019 · Answer

I've been with a cheater and forgave him, but no matter how much you tell yourself it's not a big deal it is. You'll never get that thought of him cheating on you out of your mind, and it will just not work. But I don't believe that once a cheater always a cheater saying, because people do change. I just don't think that after they cheat on you, even if they did change, you wouldn't believe them so it wouldn't work.

Sarasargent95 · Answer

Maybe! I am a religious person so forgiveness is love. However, saying sorry and promising me to never do it again is not enough. They have to show that they are sorry by repenting, doing a 180 in their life and going in the path of righteousness. I know if I guy cheats on me, I won't lose feelings for him right away so if I observe that he has is life back on track later on down the road from 2weeks to 10 years, then yes I will give him another chance :)

Nashton · Answer

if she cheated on me

then I must not be doing something right in her eyes

so let her go to who ever she's with now.

they must be doing a better job at making her happy.

cuz that's all most men try to do for their girl

Amoss2012 · Answer

I said other. I think they do, depending on the circumstances. the factors I could consider would be with whom (I mean an ex would be really bad), when (I'm out of town, I'm in town, they were drunk, sober). If the answers to those questions point towards intent to inflict pain to me, then no go dude.

Anonymous · Answer

I wouldn't take one back. I'd be wondering if they apologized just because they got caught and if they would continue doing it. I'll find someone else that respects me enough not to do something like that.

emzy-89 · Answer

once a cheater always a cheater. and I don't get how people can be in a relationship knowing the other person is in another relationship. if someone cheats on someone else with you then it's highly likely that they'll cheat on you with someone else.

DreamsMarie · Answer

Maybe because if someone tells you and he denies it then no. But if he mans up and tells you and is truly and honsetly looks like he is sorry then yeah, Everyone deserves a second chance to a certain extent.

dlop3z · Answer

Such a tough question. But for me I usually believe "Once a cheater, always a cheater" but I can see myself forgiving someone. But it would have to be a very genuine apology. Very genuine

paige_nicole3 · Answer

If they apologize, that's great. But persoanlly I can't ever trust them. Once you break that bond and that trust level, it just ins't anywhere near the same.

Brentley · Answer

To me, actions speak louder than words, so cheating really shows me that you don't care about me enough to keep yourself under control in a situation where you could cheat.

Anonymous · Answer

Cheaters, in lying, break the trust of their partners. Now, if there was an acknowledgment of this outside looking by both parties prior to the act, it would be fine, but then again, it also wouldn't be cheating. That's all I'll say about that one

ThatGuy69 · Answer

No! its sad that the second chance is more for the person that got cheated on because they probably really love the person. I guess a good way to find out is to cheat back and see how they react

Anonymous · Answer

you can forgive them for cheating but you'll never forget anyone can say sorry but if they really mean it and show you they deserve a second change then yess but most cases they don't because they just do it again excepting you to forgive them again

Littletad · Answer

I firmly believe in, "Once a cheater, always a cheater."

ALittleAmazed · Answer

My advice would be to reject repeat offenders. One chance is plenty.

martyfellow · Answer

Yes of course.   Sometimes people are just plain irresistible...

Nickishguy · Answer

some girls are the ones, you just gotta take a chance

confusedcortney · Answer

If you really think he can change his cheating ways and you care enough about him.. sure a second chance is okay, a third is not.

enlightenment · Answer

cheaters are always cheaters

Do cheaters deserve second chances?

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