I have a girlfriend... but I (kinda) like another girl?

[Anonymous]

Have been with my girlfriend for a year and 3 months but i dont find her very sexually attractive anymore and i want to be with other girls, but i love her so much and we get along well together. There is a girl i have been working with for the past 9 months and i know that she likes me. We have much in common and i am excited for her. Feel guilty.
Have been feeling like this for almost 3 months.
We almost broke up 1,5 months ago because she asked me if i had lost interest in her but we eventually agreed to stay together, but my main reason for still being with her was mainly because i felt so bad and guilty as i saw her crying. I can't see her feeling so badly.
I dont even know how to break up with her? we meet every 2 weeks (long distance, but she will move in with me and my parents in three weeks time). Would it be wrong to do it through video call? and would it be a betrayal?

[MirandaHays]

It is worse to lead your current girlfriend on and prevent her from being with someone else who feels fully committed to her. I know the situation you're in is difficult, but I believe it's best to break up with her and be honest (in a kind way). Say something along the lines of you still care about her very much, but do not feel the same as you did at the beginning of the relationship. It's better to be honest than not.

[Asker]

Yeah, but then again this problem may only be because of i want to have sex with other girls and experiment more.. then it will make no sense to leave someone you love only for sex

[MirandaHays]

I understand. So you feel like you're just sexually attracted to this girl? If so, you're right, it's not worth leaving someone you love for that reason. If you can, try to mix it up in the bedroom. Try suggesting certain things to do. Do you feel that having sex with other girls would be more enjoyable? It can't be too different from doing so with the one you love.

[Asker]

It's just not that one girl but almost every time i see another girl i think about being in bed with her, it seems like i want to be with every other girl

[Asker]

But no its not just sexually, i like her personality too,

[crushfever]

NO! if you love her and she loves you save your relationship... you might be feeling like you need more than she can give you but she will be with you to fulfill all those needs. If she is willing enough to move in with you then she is a keeper... just feel positive about your relationship and everything will feel better. I hope everything works out.

PS: "if it is love, it is rough"~LEON

[Mekachu]

It's a guy and he's 19 I'm 18. But I get your driff😅🙂 and it's his mom that's the problem cause of what my mom did😒

[Mekachu]

Wait ignore me wrong post sowwy

[Asker]

@Mekachu haha!

[MidnightThoughts]

Dude, in this situation it's better for yo to be honest with her. It seems like you're just avoiding it because you don't want to hurt her and feel guilty that things went this way. But believe me, it's better to be honest for both of you. Otherwise you'd just end up both in an unhappy relationship. Why lie to yourselves?
It seems hard now, but you'll both be happier in the long run.

[MidnightThoughts]

I'd have a talk with her (if possible, face to face) and explain what you've been through (having feelings for another girl, which is not your fault, btw) and tell her that you're really sorry that things happened this way.

[Asker]

Yeah but she know that me and this other girl are good friends and my girlfriend almost hates her because she "thinks" (knows) that i like her back.
It would break my girlfriend to tell her that i liked this girl

[MidnightThoughts]

I'm sorry you're in this situation.
Still better to be honest, you don't need to tell who is the girl, even though I'm sure she'll ask. Someone will always end up hurt. If you keep avoiding it she'll be hurt as well and for a long time, since she can feel you're distant or don't feel the same way anymore. Plus, you'll be unhappy too.

[Wonderer89]

Man up. And break up with her.
You think you made it easier for her by getting back together because she was crying? No, you prolonged her hurt.

Relationships end, especially when we're young. That's life, and that's fine. But do it kindly and with respect for what you shared together, and stick with your decision instead of dragging it out

[Asker]

Yeah maybe it is the best thing to do. But it is so hard because one part of me wants to be with other people and the other wants to be with her, i am not 100% sure that a breakup is what i want (if that makes sense)
Thanks for your answer

[Wonderer89]

Regardless of what you "think" you want, you're being dishonest to her by cultivating feelings with another girl while in a relationship. Would you be ok with her doing the same thing with a man she worked with, making her only 50/50 if she wanted to be with you anymore?

[Asker]

No :/
In this instance do you think breaking up through phone is a "weak" thing to do?

[Wonderer89]

Is it really, really hard/impossible to go and see her?

[Asker]

Yeah a long drive. I should have done it yesterday when we met

[Wonderer89]

Then Skype if you can. But don't want until she's started packing to come and be with you

[Asker]

Yeah exactly

[Girly1710]

Let's make this as simple as possible. You don't actually love your current girlfriend if you want someone else that badly. Don't let her move in while you know this. You have to tell her you're not in love. Otherwise it's more and more mean to her the longer this goes on.

[Ali55sven]

Yeah break up with her an get a new girlfriend. Out with the old, in with the new.

[momo770]

Break up, be decent cuz karma is a bitch

[Dansby]

let her down easily

[Anonymous]

Don't lead her on.