Why does my boyfriend's Ex keep coming back? Was she trying to hurt me?

[Qeirdgirl225]

I just want to know people's thoughts on this. She recently reached out and started talking to me. Her and I got to talking more and then soon after she wanted to apologize to my boyfriend and wanted to talk to him, but wanted to make sure it was okay with me. She recently had a break up not to long ago. She told my boyfriend how she wanted to be my friend but felt weird. (Never expressed this to me.) My boyfriend told her some deep stuff about his past that he never told her due to what she had been through, which made me uncomfortable. We both cut contact with her. But I didn't feel she was being genuine and I'm back and forth with this. Was wondering on anyone else's thoughts. I would be happy to answer any questions. I just want to get to the bottom of things to move on.

[NightBurger]

What good can come from letter her talk to him? Clearly, she's looking for a way back in.

[Qeirdgirl225]

How you mean?
She keeps coming back and all of my friends felt like she was trying to take him away from me. They felt she was manipulating me because halfway through talking and getting close to me she started asking for my boyfriend and I couldn't deny it, I pitied her because she recently has been through a lot.
How do I get my boyfriend to understand and see this because we had an argument where he was telling me about how she wanted to be my friend, how she has nobody. But she wouldn't tell me those things. He just pissed me off. But he agreed to cut contact. I want him to see what she was doing, but he wants to give her the benefit of the doubt.

[NightBurger]

@ Qeirdgirl225 Your friends are right. Sounds like they've got your back.

Your boyfriend should not have a problem not being "friends" with his ex. He did choose you.

[Qeirdgirl225]

Yeah, I just go back and forth with it a lot because I felt like I hurt people and I hurt her. It's just she kept coming in and out and a lot of people didn't agree with him even talking to her. He was hiding it from his dad when she came to visit, he deleted his text so his dad wouldn't see. Which bothered me. I don't understand why he would still talk to her if it meant hiding shit from peoplw. It just didn't feel right.