Advice for a girl who keeps getting ghosted by guys who seemed to seriously like me?

Anonymous

Part of unpacking why I was ghosted the first or second time came with over explaining myself and suddenly having a spotlight on me to prove that I DO matter and that I AM a good person. At least that’s how I saw it. Mentally it felt like I was in box. Being ghosted the first time by a man who I was in love with and who I thought loved me, who took my virginity and who had cried to me to convince me how much he loved me really hurt. But after him, ALL the other times it didn’t work out with a guy paled in comparison. I guess it helped that after the first man ghosted me (the one who took my virginity) I maintained celibacy ever since for all these years. I was always able to just move on and forget eventually any new man who impressed me for a moment and then pulled away over time. But I never forgot the first one. The most recent time I was ghosted was by this rich man who sent flowers to my job. I can understand this one. Unlike the other times, I feel like this time was actually my fault. Not that I did anything bad, but that I had too much going on to make it work. He offered to fly me out multiple times but I just didn’t trust it. I asked him twice if it wasn’t working could we stay friends. I wanted to think that because he was older he might be mature enough to say “actually it’s not working” and then choose to either stay friends or part ways permanently. But instead he lied to me, saying he still thought of us as being on the “same page” and then ghosting me days later after I gave him an “out” that he refused to take. It’s like he just HAD to ghost me. Simply saying it wasn’t working must have been too hard. So it broke a part of me. Just like with most other guys, I was able to let the man go without So much as a question. But this time I just felt done. I couldn’t muster up the energy to care anymore. That was over 2 months ago and this feeling hasn’t gone away. It’s like I just don’t care nor do I try anymore

Advice for a girl who keeps getting ghosted by guys who seemed to seriously like me?
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