I broke up with my boyfriend last week and the next morning I realised it was a huge mistake and I wanted to get back together.
Let me give you some context. I have been feel homesick lately and I just lost my grandmother who brought me up like a mother. I am in therapy but I have been having a really hard time dealing with the loss. I have also been extremely stressed with a toxic work environment and school (I study artificial intelligence which is demanding). My boyfriend is by nature a bit distant but he tried his best to help me. His parents are also amazing. They were always so nice to me when I was at their place. However, my boyfriend sometimes lashes out at me and yells at me for no reason. I normally let it go but it does bother me and we have had some conversations about it and he always very apologetic when it happens.
A week before the break-up, I fell sick and threw up in his car. He yelled at me for throwing up in his car then got angrier when I asked him to drop me at my place (my stuff was at his house and we would have had to go back to his place then to mine) because he said he was tired.
The day before the breakup, I had a hard time with my boss at work. I had been through several rounds of interview with a good company for an internship position and they wanted a final interview. I asked my boss if I could switch my days of work to accommodate the interview and she was very cold and rude to me. The same day, my mom told me my dad is sick and the company sent me the interview challenge which I found overwhelming.
There was so much going on all of a sudden and I cried at work. I felt really anxious and like everything was collapsing around me. I tried to reach out to my boyfriend and he all he said was "take a nap". That made me so mad because I was expecting him to want to meet up and be there for me. But he had forgotten I was at work that day. Then later that night, he went out with his friends and that made me even more sad since I needed him.
Then the next day, I still felt too resentful to be nice to him like I am usually. He also did not talk to me much.
Then I broke up that night. He was so sad. He did not want to break up and gave me so many chances to take it back but I was simply too resentful and overwhelmed by everything.
The next day I talked to my mom and while talking to her I realised that I shouldn't have...
But then he texted back saying he doesn't think he can change and that maybe I was right to break up. I kept trying to ask him to get back together but he said he just wants to be alone now.
After talking to him a bit he said he is ready to give it a chance but now he's so distant and barely talks to me. He offered to pick me up from work the other day and we met. He was so mad. He kept telling me I was so...
