Should I ask for a divorce?

[Akam93]

I don't want to give up on my marriage but I feel like a burden to my husband. I love him very much but I feel like he dosen't give me much. No affection, no cuddles, no nothing. He treats me rather poorly.

[mobiusforniner]

If you feel marriage is all cuddles and roses, you will have to adjust your perspective, because it’s not. Marriage, in a lot of cases, is a ton of work. It’s compromise and communication. It’s sacrificing one’s want for the betterment of another. If you’re not willing to communicate the conflict and help develop reasonable compromises, you’re part of the marriage’s failure.

the only exception is dealing with an abusive spouse, but you didn’t readily indicate that’s the case here. Lack of cuddles or attention isn’t abuse, rather it’s pointing to something inside himself that isn’t being fulfilled. So communicate, identify the root causes, and grow each other into the relationship you both envision marriage to be.

[ProbablyClueless]

It might make you happier to get a divorce...

[LazerBean]

If you aren't going to try to be a more pleasant person who doesn't give him the cold shoulder for petty things like going on work trips with people you choose to despise out of jealousy, then that might be a good idea.

[Jamie05rhs]

@lazybean Please don't advocate divorce. You aren't helping.

[LazerBean]

Their divorce is inevitable, whether or not I advocate for it

[Jamie05rhs]

No, it is not inevitable. Are you a Christian or not? If so, you must believe in the power of the Holy Spirit.

[LazerBean]

Whether or not I believe in the power of the holy Spirit has nothing to do with her situation.

[LazerBean]

I noticed you have a lot to say abouty advice, but nothing to say to her. Maybe you should give her some advice if you think what I am telling her is incorrect.

[Anonymous]

You need to talk to him. Maybe even write him a letter explaining your feelings.

[TommyMountainFigure]

Yes. That would seem logical, as It sounds like he's already given up on you!

[Mrtcn01]

marriage is the hardest thing in the world.. why do you think he does not give you much. maybe he is giving in his way. Can you try to see good ways?

[DrPepper12]

Have you done counseling? Are finances a consideration? Kids? Sounds like he's the dead weight not you tbh

[VV3ZZY123]

Sorry your going through that. But think about it like this. The sooner you leave, the sooner you can meet a better guy like me. 😄

[VV3ZZY123]

Sorry. I have no idea what your going through. I've no experience in that kind of thing.

[mistershy94]

Asl yourself this: am i going to be happier without this person in my life? And then act accordingly

[avery58]

Did you talk to him about it?

[Akam93]

I can't.

[avery58]

But when you tell him about getting a divorce you'd have to tell him the reason you want one anyway, so maybe it's better to do so before you go through with it to see if you can save the relationship

[Redstang88]

Well have you said anything?