Should I get a divorce?

[Anonymous]

Our relationship started if kind of rocky.

He was in a bad financial state and I was in a bad mental state….. It was a little bit of both for the two of us.

I was going to college, hiding in my door room trying to get balanced on my new medications. Dating life was poor to non existent, so I looked to the internet for new friends and maybe some causal sex.

He just so happened to be one of the few men that didn’t immediately ask me about my body. He was kind and smart but oh so very blunt. But it was refreshing.

6 years past, we have gotten through Covid, working through trauma and plenty of hardships along the way.

We dealt with fertility issues and learning to balance work/chore life. Teaching each other different things. Me softening his edges and him giving me a backbone. I love this man. He is kind when it matters, smart and confident. But sometimes those things just don’t balance out.

I don’t know if it’s the fertility issues or working with each-other 24 hours a day, but I’m starting to despise the man.

He can be hurtfully blunt and lacks a drive for the future. He criticizes me at work in front of our co workers. He chooses to play video games and isolate himself from others. Gets upset if I make plans to hang out with people.

The largest thing is ANY TIME I bring up the fact of what he said or did hurt me, he gets all soft and says he loves me. He didn’t mean to, he was just teasing. But getting an apology is like pulling teeth.

I am beyond perfect…. I know that I am not easy to be with either. But I don’t know how much longer I can do this. I don’t even want to have sex half the time anymore.

What’s wrong with me? And am I horrible for wanting to leave?

[DreamCrescent]

hi, girlie

i couldn’t help but notice while i was reading your post, the affection and understanding in your words. once you’re at the divorce stage, there will be no question

my observation here is when he is confronted about your relationship with him he resorts to emotional blackmail. he cries or acts sad or plays the victim instead of the mature thing of facing it, apologizing, making it better. so that’s something that definitely needs work

otherwise, girlie, it’s your relationship. everyone can appreciate it’s more complex than what words in a post can portray and no one is in it but you and him. sit with yourself and see. no one can give you the advice that’s right for you

with respect

[Paris13]

Dee a Lawyer. You need to Be Happy and this One doesn't Help Any. Good Luck. xxoo

[Paris13]

Thanks, Gag. Short and Simple. xxoo

[molonski2]

can't you change the 24 hours a day work / live thing?

It sounds to me like you did the hard yards then this has just disintegrated , but I've seen fertility do this on numerous occasions , you both either need to commit , get counselling and work though issue by issue.

Or you throw up your hands say " Too Hard " , and I'm outta here , fresh start. Your decision? You choose.

[TheGuyWhoKnowsStuff]

The guy doesn't want to apologise of his own volition because he isn't genuinely sorry. It's prison thinking: it is everyone else's fault but his own. You need to respect yourself and draw a line and seek happiness for yourself. Decide whether that happiness is with him or without him.

[DreamLife7]

You're stupid I'm sorry 🤣

[Danny_dan92]

It’s done. End it