Girlfriend wants deeper conversations. I asked her to initiate a few to demonstrate what she would like. She said no, what should I do?

[Anonymous]

girlfriend (33) has said she needs more emotional intimacy and vulnerability primarly through conversation. She has asked me (m32) to ask more about her life, dreams, culture l, ask deep questions etc however I fid this difficult. Firstly she rarely does this herself (which I find strange if it is her need) surely she wouldn't be able to stop herself asking me those very same questions, initiating deep conversations etc and secondly I prefer conversations like this to happen organically, the couple of times i have come prepared with a few questions it just feels forced and my girlfriend knows it so it doesn't fulfil her anyway. I therefore asked if she could show me, teach me how she would like these conversations to proceed by initiating a few of her own so we can build on it. I thought it might be a good idea but she said no, that this was her need so I should want to do it. I understand her frustration but I honestly don't feel she is taking enough responsibility for her own need. Not really sure where we go from here. Am I wrong for expecting her to take some responsibility for her needs, as in make an effort and not leave it completely to me?

Girlfriend should help to meet her own needs

You should do all the work to show that you care

[jennifer_bloom]

A dead pig is better at telling lies than you are and a living pig understands women better than you do. You have no respect for your girlfriend and continue to date her or tell stories about her because you are mentally ill and do not have anything positive to devote your energy to.

[Asker]

Are you mentally unwell?

[normalice]

She wants to know that she has your attention and that you are thinking of how to speak to her. Women generally don't know what they want when it comes to this and so basically just expect to be routinely impressed with artful language. The direction of the expectation is not inherently unreasonable but the magnitude often is. Just as men must learn that women aren't all dirty sex fiends by default women must also learn that men aren't endlessly thinking romantic poetry waiting to find the right girl to hear it.

[Chazmatazz269]

I would have been gone before i was done writing that question. She’s deliberately setting you up for failure. She expects you to be more invested in the relationship than she is. If that’s your thing, it’s kool and the gang. But i wouldn’t put up with it.

[Crazyced]

I noticed the same behaviour on bumble, where women would indicate in their profile that one of their interest was deep chats. They would all inevitably fail to initiate a conversation that could ever remotely be considered something other then small talk, most of them being a flat 'hi'.

My conclusion is that while they say they enjoy such thing, they fully expect you to do the heavy lifting and drive the conversation while they take a back seat position and be entertained.

The onus is still on you to peak their interest.

[ohmyguy]

It turns out what she meant what shallow but longer çonversations n for you hear to attain the same level of enlightenment as her she can't repeatedly test n fail you n say confused n lost you be with out her... only down side i see such training intencity is having your pencil sharpend. the dulled deliberately.. is a way too kinky kink better to. go through all a to z with all is recommed before going through that hell she her ain't need be in

[D_Bone_Steak]

Just slap her with your penis and stuff your nutts in her mouth.

That's what I'd do.

[captain_voidwalker]

Let us pray the pimps prayer. Lord please have mercy on the soul of this bitch, and guide my pimp and it strong lord, that she might learn a hoes place. Amen

[SotiCoto]

Dump her, then ask if that fulfils her needs.

[KrakenAttackin]

She wants you to become more interested in the really important issues like the Kardashian's, Reality TV, Tik Thot, and Instagram.

[jahaims]

Dump her for being a moron.

[OddBeMe]

Lol she said no. Dump her and move on.

[thisAppIsGarbage]

You should daye her younger hotter sister