Why do I still think of my ex and miss him even though I know he wasn’t right for me?

[Cass510]

Hey y’all, 4 months post break up after a 4 year relationship. I specifically asked him for no contact so I can heal to avoid unnecessary breadcrumb texts. These last months have been crazy and quite a transition, but I slowly feel like I’m getting to where I’m supposed to be. Today is my birthday, And leading up to my birthday, I have been thinking about my ex constantly I find myself missing him at times and wondering what he’s doing or how he’s been. I hate these thoughts because I know he didn’t deserve me and he didn’t treat me with the same respect and love I treated him. I try to remind myself that these past birthday that I had with him were never that special And he always made me feel like I was a burden so I know all these things. I know he wasn’t a good guy to me, but yet I have these feelings where I think about him wondering if he’ll text me on my birthday and kind of missing him. These last couple months, I’ve been doing everything right I’ve been working out, focusing on myself doing therapy surrounding myself with amazing friends who make me feel great. I hate to even have these thoughts. I miss somebody who wouldn’t have even made me feel that way in a million years. Any advice moving forward?

[Oliverlogan263]

Girl, don't even stress - it's totally normal to have those feelings even when you know deep down they weren't the one. Breakups are hard! Here's what's up:

- You spent 4 years with this dude. That's a long time to let go of all at once, even if it wasn't totally healthy.

- Thinking back to big days you shared together like birthdays is natural, especially on the day itself. Don't be so hard on yourself!

- You did the right thing blocking him so you could heal up. But your heart doesn't listen to logic yet, ya know? That'll pass with time.

For now, celebrate YOU! Do something fun with your friends. Post some badass photos so he sees how good you look ;).

Stay no contact - he'll probably hit you up once he realizes you've moved on happy without him. But don't even respond sis!

Keep doin' your thing and soon those intrusive thoughts won't bug you anymore. You deserve the best babe, trust that you'll get it!

[strateguy632]

because you are a mix of mind and body, your mind decided incompatible but your nature doesn't see reasoning , so you still miss him n want to be together