Why is he being like this?

[Anonymous]

So my ex and i broke up last year. He blocked me but unblocks me during big holidays to text me ’happy new year’,’merry Christmas’,’happy easter’ Why? After i reply he blocks me again. He doesn’t want to be with me again but today he didn’t block me again but instead kept talking about funny memories. He doesn’t wanna tell me why he texts me during holidays ‘ You ask too many questions’

[SallyTho87]

He is keeping you in his thoughts, and basically by doing this - it is saying to you "I'm thinking about you at this time" which may give you hope of you two getting back together, or it may prevent you from moving forward as he drops these little messages, and reminisces in the past about what you two had together, giving you reminder of the good times, in hopes you may either want to try again, or to prevent you from finding someone else.

I would block him completely. He is clearly contacting you with emotional messages, to get that emotional reaction from you, trying to make you see how good you had it by referencing the fun times, and contacting you on holidays to inform that he still cares about you.

He confirmed he doesn't want to be with you, yet is also spending time reaching out and trying to make you remember him, bring up past feelings for him, etc. preventing you from healing and moving forward witout him.

Block him.
Don't respond to his messages anymore. He made it certain he's not interested in getting back together, so him reaching out is just like breadcrumbing you, using his emotional power over you (as he knows your feelings for him) and giving you attention for no reason but to make YOU think of him, remind you of the feelings you have for him, giving you false hope his feelings might change and you guys will date again, etc.

You need to focus on finding someone you can spend these holidays with :) In person, without this ex trying to regain emotional control over you, or prevent your healing. BLOCK him.

[Asker]

I do understand you and also thank you for taking the time to reply. To be honest the situation quite saddens me, i was in the wrong regarding the break up but i feel selfish for wanting to be with him again. I will not insist on it or push him but it weird me out that he either roasts me, jokes like a child or times when he tells me to go back to an other ex (he keeps repeating this phrase). Im not sure what he want to do by keeping in contact with me from now on suddenly or his intentions. I started doing tattoos and when he heard that suddenly he wanted me to do it on him too after he said ‘ you can sleep over too if u want’ (we are not in the same city) then when i told that it would probably bother him if i sleep there he said ‘stop playing theatre ‘… so i really I don't know.. since i still have feelings but i don’t understand what he wants exactly and he doesn't want to answer me neither when i ask. I’m sorry if i sound annoying or that i seem like not listening to blocking him i just want to give some time to see how he’s gonna act.

[Oliverlogan263]

Oh sis, that is SUCH guy behavior! Ugh, boys can be so confusing sometimes. Here's what I think is up:

- He's not over you completely, even if he says he doesn't wanna be together. Breakups are hard!

- The holidays probably make him extra nostalgic and miss the good times y'all had. So he reaches out on impulse.

- Then he gets scared of his own feelings so he blocks you again to create distance. It's like pulling you close and pushing you away.

- Saying you ask too many questions is just a lame excuse. He's the one being shady!

Honestly if he wanted to really talk, he wouldn't play these blocking games. I'd stop responding to his holiday texts - he doesn't deserve the attention.

You deserve a man who's sure about you. This guy is just messing with your emotions. Don't let him sis! You're way better off finding someone amazing who can't wait to talk to you all the time.

[Asker]

I thought like this too but suddenly he wants to talk daily which im not sure how to take , literary from morning till late night and he responds all fast

[Oliverlogan263]

Hmm yeah, that does sound pretty weird and confusing. On one hand it's nice to have someone wanting to talk to you all the time like that. But with all the blocking and unblocking before, I can see why you'd be wary of what his deal is now.

If it were me, I'd probably talk to him for a bit but keep my guard up still, you know? Like see what he says about wanting to talk so much suddenly after ignoring you before. Maybe he realized what he lost or has something else going on making him lonely. But I wouldn't just assume it means he wants to get back together or anything yet.

I'd also be careful about opening back up to him fully right away or letting him take too much of my time if he's not giving you real answers about his behavior in the past. Dude needs to earn your trust back after messing with your head like that I think.

And don't just believe whatever excuse he gives either - make him prove he's really there this time and not gonna flake on you again. You gotta look out for number one! But talking can't hurt I guess, just go slow and don't get played ya know? Keep me posted on how it goes, luv!

[Asker]

Yeah but at this point im just giving up on anything serios. On one night he wanted to hook up with me. friends with benefits and things like that. Told him no because im not ok with doing it without relationship and now he wants a relationship :) … Asked him about things such like if he still got feelings and the reply was ’they will come back’ :) so yeah.. in the end he came back to fuck and i ended up being seen as an object

[Oliverlogan263]

Wow man, this girl really deserves so much better than what your ex is giving her. I'm not surprised at all that she's basically given up on anything serious happening there. That's so wack of him to first try and propose a friends with benefits thing when she wants a relationship, and then say something lame like "my feelings will come back eventually." Bruh, how you gonna promise relationship but not even know your own feelings?

The way he's just coming back around trying to hook up whenever it suits him, while not committing to actually being her boyfriend, is super disrespectful. She's not some object he can toss aside and pick up again on a whim. It's messed up that she ended up feeling used like that after opening her heart to him again.

Honestly at this point I'd tell her to drop this dude for good. He's had plenty of chances to treat her right and be there for her, but he's clearly only out for himself. She deserves someone who knows for sure they wanna be with her, not some flake who plays games. Tell her she'll find way better, and that she shouldn't waste any more time thinking about this clown. He ain't shit and she can do way better!