Can crushes break your heart or is heartbreak just for someone you've dated?

Question

Give examples if crushes can break your heart. I feel like it's a strong thing to say about someone you're not in love with, you're just infatuated with them. But maybe I'm wrong.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

I think early on, yes. In high school, yes. I remember as a sophomore crying when a girl didn’t show up to a date, and I had been really excited about it and had worked really hard to get some money for the fairly simple date and had planned so much.

But now, I’m more used to the really horrible behavior, and being humiliated, so it’s not as severe a heartbreak much anymore… it’s mostly just some kind of sadness or disappointment from the cruel comments about what an ugly worthless piece of sh*t I am.

I try not to have too big a crush on any woman these days. I think there’s been enough heartbreak that I really don’t want to put up with any of it any more, can’t be AS heartbroken if I didn’t ask (or didn’t flirt). I just assume none of them want me (the truth), and try to go on with my day.

I suppose more of the deeper heartbreak is reserved for more “serious” relationships or the more memorable stuff. It all still hurts… I just gave up on some of the future heartbreak by just giving up on trying.

coachTanthony · Accepted Answer

People break their own heart with ridiculous expectations of "Everyone should like me"

Crimsyjo · Accepted Answer

Yes my heart is broken more by a crush I had than by breaking up with my 3mth boyfriend...

It sucks. And I knew from the start it was never gonna be a thing. Cos I'm 45 and he was 27 and we connected and hooked up but the emotional depths we went to were so deep. And then he pulled away after he finally opened up about some sad stuff in his life that just broke my heart for him. I really wanted us to stay friends! That was back in February. I literally slept with him 4 days before getting my boyfriend. And it was couple weeks after that he opened up and then pulled away. I still feel sad over him. You just can't help what your heart does even when your head is completely aware and logical about it!

Damaged00 · Accepted Answer

It depends on how much you invest yourself. You can simply have a crush and not do anything about it with no expectations and be completely unbothered. It's once you have expectations and start picturing yourself with this person or start putting in effort that your heart might get broken.

I honestly think it has more to do with where your at in your life then it does with the actual person. If your lonely and desperately looking for someone, your crush becomes what can fill that loneliness and when it doesn't happen, you're more crushed of the fact that you couldn't fill that loneliness and you were rejected than losing them. Not going to lie, we do it to ourselves.

DishLady · Answer

Crushes can send a person into a serious tailspin. It’s why it’s better to keep things chill when you feel yourself crushing on someone rather than letting it escalate — by letting them flirt with you or by flirting back….

OhLongJohnsoning · Answer

It's believed my grandma died of a "broken heart", while we don't literally see the heart "break", as it's more of a metaphorical saying, we believe she died simply because he no longer wanted to go on, after grandpa died. She died of colon cancer though, as she refused to get colonoscopies. Grandpa died of old age (he was just going through stuff, and eventually just couldn't hold on anymore)

There's an episode of south park, where cartmans grandma dies. She gives him a million dollars, so he buys an amusement park he's always wanted. Kyle doesn't understand how a guy who acts like cartman could receive all that money (kind of like trump), and kyle himself wakes up with a hemorrhoid. A 10 year old, or however old he is at the time, waking up, with a hernia, it's unheard of, as they generally only happen to the elderly

So, they get him in to the hospital, and they say he's actually going to be ok, however, because kyle is still really upset about why cartman got all that money, even after being a fucking douchebag, doesn't he doesn't seem to want to "go on" anymore. The doctor says it's almost as if he's "given up". As if he had a "broken heart". He goes on to live at the end of the episode, but, it's interesting to think about that, you can be so depressed/upset that you literally COULD die, of a broken heart, supposedly

He ge

Anonymous · Answer

Yes, this is why you never get invested with someone unless they are investing in you. And a crush is just that. You are building a faux relationship in your head when you're crushing. So when the relationship for whatever reason doesn't materialize, or they reject you. In your head you feel like you've been dumped. Because you had already cultivated a connection with them in your head.

This reminds me of an episode of Big Bang Theory. Where Penny feels bad because she hasn't told Leonard she loves him and Leonard originally bothered by it goes "it makes sense that you're not ready to say I love you, because I've been in this relationship 3 years longer than you".😆

Because he crushed on her for 3 years. Before he got the courage to ask her out. So in his head he was 3 years in already.

Laciejordan · Answer

Sure, a crush can break your heart. If you develop a deep friendship with them and start to develop feelings over a long period of time, then suddenly you find out they found someone, it can feel similar to heartbreak but is usually gotten over pretty quick. Being actually involved with someone and having been dating them, is definitely a worse heartbreak.

sage2021 · Answer

You can help who we're attracted to, but a crush is a one way street.
Sometimes people you have a crush on don't even know you're alive.
If anything, you chose the wrong person to have a crush on because it's not going to be reciprocated. So, you kinda set yourself to end up hurt.

ProbablyClueless · Answer

Definitely. There's nothing worse than hoping for something that can't be because of some stupid, pointless, personal bullshit.

Some of the more heartbreaking moments I've witnessed in life have been realizing that a perfectly good relationship is being destroyed by someone, for seemingly arbitrary reasons as a matter of convenience.

KrisKris81 · Answer

If you are rejected by a crush, then you might feel bad and have low self-esteem for a while, but I think real heart break requires the loss of a deeper connection. If you are experiencing heart break over a crush, then it may have been more of an obsession.

thatshydork · Answer

There’s a reason why they call it a crush. It’s because you can feel crushed if they don’t reciprocate your feelings.

Explorer91 · Answer

Yes of course crushes can break your heart. but normally the reason for this is that the connection with your crush is mainly in your head. And so when your crush doesn't live up to the "limerance" you get upset.

luvstoned4him · Answer

I've felt stung but not broken hearted but it depends on how invested you are in a person. So if you had your heart seriously set on this person and didn't get him then yea that could break your heart

OfMiceandMen · Answer

I tend to agree with you @bethany22  If it's just a crush then you can be disappointed, even a little distraught, but not heartbroken. Heartbroken is reserved for those people you are in love with and beyond that initial crush stage.

WhitneySnow · Answer

Crushes can break your heart. Just because you’re not going out with someone doesn’t mean you can’t have feelings for them and they can’t have feelings for you too.

Account · Answer

No, your own expectations of them make you feel hurt, not them. Your expectations of them are an illusion. That is the difference.

RingOfFire · Answer

I'd say that crushes can only break your heart if you are extremely lonely to begin with and desperate for love. If you're in that state then your heart is very easily broken so even the loss of a whiff of love might be enough to do it.

xavid9 · Answer

Mostly crushes break heart but it's not so deep If you broke up in relationship it's in the heart forever Though you'll feel bad in crush heartbreak but it won't make you cry at least

NathanDavis · Answer

we can certainly fool ourselves in so many ways... including this one

avery58 · Answer

Yeah, if you really like them and get your hopes up

A_Wild_Redhead · Answer

Kinda? The crazier the person is in love, the more likely the break!

MrGSpotHer · Answer

Only when they do something that makes them completely unattractive now like many men in one night or something like that but it's more I feel sad for them

Fireguy17 · Answer

I feel that it is entirely possible for anyone to break your heart.

GoodGuyBreakingBad · Answer

Yes, crushes can break our hearts.

handsomelad70 · Answer

Sure they can, but as Luke Combs sings,"Beer Never Broke My Heart." (And ol' Luke has a "Fast Car !!!")

CieloAzul · Answer

It depends on your relationship with your crush. But you will break your heart not your crush.

clampfan101 · Answer

I imagine typically sting more so than break.

Bklynbadboy12 · Answer

Sure a crush can break your heart. Have you ever had your heart broken

eagle1951 · Answer

many things can break ones heart depending on the person

loveslongnails · Answer

How can a crush break my heart?

Crazzyyworld · Answer

your crush maybe a asshole

Tonita91996 · Answer

Someone you’ve dated.

justabuddy · Answer

Maybe bruise your heart is the correct term.

shortster · Answer

Usually for dating

impalabill77 · Answer

I think they can.

yes_goddess · Answer

No not really

Can crushes break your heart or is heartbreak just for someone you've dated?

Most Helpful Opinions

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

Yes, crushes can break our hearts.