Am I wrong for asking my parents to delay my inheritance during divorce?

[Anonymous]

I was with my wife for 5 years, married for three. Out of the blue she said she wanted a divorce, she wants to enjoy being single with her BFF and go out and have girl days and travel and not be tied down. I was devastated, and tried to get her to try relationship counselling, therapy, but she wasn't interested. We were about two years into a mortgage at this point. I make good money WFH as a programmer, and I tend to do a bit more housework than she does as I have a more flexible job.

A few months before she asked for divorce my parents told us they were going to retire soon, and wanted to give my sister and I part of our inheritance - they wanted to be alive to see us enjoy it, and to ease our burden. It will be enough to pay out the mortgage.

Once I realised the marriage wasn't going to be repaired, I asked them to delay it until the divorce and settlement was done.

Fast forward to recent times, I tell my ex-wife-to-be that we are selling the house, paying off the mortgage and splitting any "profit". She asks "aren't your parents going to give us the money to pay it off?" and I told her I was getting them to delay it until after the settlement, and I would be buying myself a house outright.

She absolutely FLEW off the handle, called me every name in the book - it seems she had plans of me paying her out for "her half" of the house and travelling with that money.

She's bad mouthed me to a lot of our friends, but most are on my side with the exception of her BFF. I've checked with a lawyer and I'm legally in the clear, and have had the house valued, and if we get what we want for the house, we will be able to pay off the mortgage, all fees for early payout etc, and walk away with maybe $20k each in profit.

So, have I done something wrong here? She says I'm screwing her over, but I disagree.

[Anonymous]

How would you be screwing her over? If i was you i'd tell her to take it up with you parents. And say, "maybe you can convince them otherwise". Is what you did dirty? Well you knowingly denied her a payout so to speak.😆 But any right thinking person would tell you she had no rightful claim to that money anyhow, nor do you (until your parents are deceased. And no one wants that). It's their money, and there choice what they do with it. Your wife is only ENTITLED to what you two earned together over the course of the marriage.

[Screenwriter]

After a five year relationship she expects to get some of your inheritance? She's out of her mind. And you were rational to put off getting it.

Forget about her. She was counting chickens long before they were hatched. Jeez.

[molonski2]

No you are not doing anything wrong , delay it , get divorced get all that over with , your parents won't care..
Give her as little as possible..

[Nikki1989]

No — based on what you’ve described and what the law says about inheritances, you haven’t done anything wrong.

[admles]

100% not doing anything wrong.

She basically thought she had an inn to a big chunk of money and a single life, and you have justifiably and most importantly legally ruined it!

Good on you I say!

[Anonymous]

You're doing the right thing

If she really proves to be a serious issue then spend some cash on a permanent solution

[abc3643]

No, you are doing the right thing.

[Calyptomaniac]

No, that sounds perfectly reasonable to me

[Ariesman81Nshiiit]

Nah... let her think small

[In_Trance]

I don't know why you'd do that