I made a mistake and I want him back.

Question

I broke up with my boyfriend of 4 Years basically because his best friend told me he is back with his old girlfriend (before me) and I saw her number on his phone where else he said they don't talk anymore. we were living together 2 days before I moved I saw his ex girl's number on his phone but I didn't ask him about it and a week later his friend told me he is back with his ex. remember: I have moved 3 hours away from him because of the new job. Long story short, I wasn't thinking and I snapped instead of talking to him ( because his friend has always been making stories even about me ) and I broke up with him. I waited 3 days till I told him I missed him and wanted to still be with him. He said I broke his heart and he didn't want to see me because he was angry and needed time to think. So a few more days go by and I told him I was on my way over to his house. This was about a week since we broke up. Keep in mind throughout all of this I was constantly texting him and not giving him the space he wanted. I showed up at his house and he told me he is heartbroken and can't sleep at night, then he goes to work during the day and gets angry thinking about the whole situation. I told him I love him and I want to be with him. He told me he is really confused and doesn't know what he wants anymore. He still needs time and wants me to respect that. He said he loves me but we both aren't happy. He is also a firm believer that if you break up it's for a reason... I leave and of course the next 2 days I constantly text him. He doesn't respond until I begged him to let me know if he still loves me and I won't quit until I have an answer. Over a few texts back, he said it was all my fault I started this the first place and he said he didn't say ihe doesn't love me. but I started this. Did he actually mean he doesn't love me anymore? I don't believe it because I KNOW he did love me, so how can he not in 14 days. Did I push him to say that so I would leave him alone? To make matters worse, I snapped once again and sent him a bunch of insulting texts which I know hurt him. I love him more than anything. I screwed up and I'm willing to get help to control my temper. We had no major problems besides my temper and insecurities. I've left him alone since then about a month but I am going absolutely crazy, I might have lost the love of my life, and it was all my fault!. when he phones it all about my mail or my things since we have been living together. and the converstion is just simple we not fighting or being mean he will ask if I am ok! and definately my voice sounds fine, and we will talk about whatever he phoned me about but not about the relationship.

Jadelil25 · Accepted Answer

I know it's hard and I have been in the situation myself. You need to give him the space, you are not letting him have time which he has asked for which means he can not think.

I know it's hard but you need to give him that time that he needs. I think it wil also be good for you to have time to think. You need to think about the reason you really did split up with him.

I would let him make contact 1st. If he does not get in contact for a week, try messaging him once and asking how he is. If he does not respond, leave it and do not message him again.

If he does not get in contact, after a week, try once more and if he does not respond to that. Move on.I know it's hard and it will take time but you can do it. Everyone goes through this and it's a part of life and learning.

You are still very young and have plenty of time. You clearly got in to the relationship at a young age. Have some time to your self, go out with friends, have some fun, join clubs, get hobbies and take your mind off things.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Give him time, that is all you can really do. You should think about why you overreacted so quickly, it seems like you didn't trust him and that is probably what is upsetting him. You need time to, so you can think about the problems you had that caused what you are going through now.

You can still get him back, but you first need to give him space. If you can , try to go a month with limited contact. No contact would be better but if you have things at his place and mail or whatever you might need to contact him. But when you do, keep is short and don't talk about your life and how you are doing, no personal details!

ellaaa · Accepted Answer

Did you even ask him to tell you the truth when his friend said his back with his ex..? You should've asked him before even deciding to break-up. You broke his heart by not confronting him and just left.. Its not totally your fault though.. You should leave him alone for now and stop constantly texting him. He needs space to think about all this. Leave him for maybe a week or 2 and wait till he text you.. if he doesn't then you text him yourself. I know your also hurt but you gotta be strong and wait for his answer instead of forcing him to say he loves you..

good luck