How to prove to my ex boyfriend I'm not a drama queen and get back together?

[Anonymous]

For most of my previous relationship, I was kind of an emotional mes and my guy knew that. In the beginning hints were fine but I had insecurities about what he thought what we should do etc. instead of just talking to him and enjoying him. I bought into the whole "make him wonder" and dating blah blah and just tried too hard to be what I thought he wanted. And when that wasn't working, I just became angry even though he would do his best to make me happy. I just kept searching for problems... And because of the stress I put on myself, I broke it off with him, said it wasn't working and he just said if THAT'S what's makes me happy, then fine. And he wants nothin to do with me and cut off all contact. After being alone for a while I realized "omg I was really mean for no reason. We could've talked and really enjoyed each other if I had calmed down like he said and stop being insecure." I wanted to try to talk to him and tell him I know what I did wrong and would like to try again but the couple of times I contacted him after we broke up, he's ignored me. I do want to be with him and all I want is for us to have laughs and enjoy each other before all the drama and just love and support each other. I feel horrible leaving him the way I did and taking everything out on him. Even if we couldn't date, I still would like to be his friend, he was my first boyfriend. What should I do? Should I send him a letter explaining to him, text him friendly things or leave him alone or what?

I just wanted to say, dramatics aside, I want to be with him and that's all I want. And if we can't be together, I still want to be in his life and respect his decision.

[Anonymous]

Realistically you probably can't salvage this relationship. Why? Because he seemingly doesn't want anything to do with you. You can either a) keep texting/contacting him and apologising and explaining your actions - which will probably make him think you're needy and crazy, or you can b) let time pass and see where it goes and if he changes his mind - which will probably result in him getting over you romantically, but possibly leave the potential for friendship.

I'd say think about how you behaved and better yourself before the next relationship begins. Trust me, I know that relationships (especially the first one) can bring out the crazy in a person. My first relationship was a disaster and all the drama in it could easily have been avoided if I had been more logical than hot tempered. Learn to think first and then act. Might sound easy in theory, but it's not. Apply it in everyday life and the way you both relate to people and complete tasks and you'll find out how much more controlled you'll become.

I know this probably isn't what you want to hear, I know that when I went through something similar I probably would have ignored it. But after that relationship I was in I was single for almost 3 years and during that time I made so many improvements. I've just recently met someone and I've taken things super slowly, and been far more reasonable and understanding - I've essentially trained myself to become more relaxed, confident and logical. It's hard as f*ck, but you just gotta want to make a change for yourself. I've honestly never been happier.

/rant. :P

[obligations]

no because the belief would be at this point that she'll always be drama. I'd ask myself, why did it take for us to be broken up for her to change and not while during the relationship.

Sorry no can do.

[martyfellow]

Let some time go by, see how you feel after that. In the meantime, try to talk through this experience with friends and anyone you meet, get some perspective on it. Then, when you contact him again, be casual about it, don't apologize up and down, just be natural and friendly and don't put presssure on him.

[Anonymous]

You can't undo what you did. No matter how much you want to.

All you can do is learn from this, and not make the same mistakes with the next guy.

[Anonymous]

I didn't read the whole thing. No, I wouldn't take her back. Once someone is an ex, they stay an ex.