Western Expat in the East Struggling to Find a Wife (Onion-inspired article)

(Disclaimer: This is an article based off of the style of the satire news article the Onion. This article is not owned by the Onion)

Western expat Tom, who despises western women has moved to the East to live and hopes to find a wife. Tom gets dates but he is confused as to why the eastern women are not taking a liking to him. His western friend Mike, who use to be an expat that studied at a university in the East encouraged him to actually listen to the women during the dates.

"I do not know why, but all of a sudden he becomes magically deaf when I use words like respect, manners, and listen when it comes to dating," Mike says. "I just do not get it," Tom said as he showed us one of the girls he went on a date with yesterday who married a western man. "Eastern women are supposed to be better," he groaned.

He does not understand why Mike was able to move back to the West to get married to a western girl. "I just find it hard to believe that both western and eastern women act negatively to disrespect, it can't be my fault, I do not make excuses as to why I can not find a wife," Tom insisted. Mike suggested dating apps and self reflection. "I tried that," he told us as he showed us the current dating app he was using. "Eastern women are supposed to be more submissive, so why did she not have sex with me after I showed her my dick pic?"

Tom later commented that maybe he should try to look at the common denominator him, but when Mike gave him advice he wanted to try something harder instead so that he could come up with more excuses not to blame himself. "Respecting women is something new to me, so it definitely has to be the women's fault. I am entitled to an eastern woman," he stated.

ikissedtheskyonce is a GirlsAskGuys Editor
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What Guys Said 1

  • If this is a true story that guy has to work on his pick up game better. If it's satire only and not real then haha very funny. That guy is stuck on false principles.


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