4 Things that Guys Don't Want to See in a Girl!

[lucasnabizada]

4 Things that Guys don't want to see in a girl!

Okay girls, let's start with a disclaimer! In no way am I proning that this is the exact way a girl should be always and in this case the way they shouldn't be...Everyone is different and you don't need guys in your lives to exist. But this is just, remotely personal things that I don't enjoy in girls, consequently avoiding this WILL be attractive to me(But also to most guys out there...) Being attractive will make your crushes/boyfriends happy- make them happy they'll make you happy! Get it.

So here are a couple non obvious things that fly under your attention radar when interacting with men, that are not...quite valuable to see in a girl. And instead I'll contrast this with what I actually like in a girl.

1) Academically shut off!

So as it turns out, there is this trend of women, who may be attractive or not, but that play dum because they really believe it's attractive. It is not an attractive feature! But these girls do it on purpose, what I really want to talk about is girls who are basically thinking all that's a value is to remain mentally inferior, academically unfulfilled. Maybe some men like girls who don't like to think, not me! I like girls who are able to think critically, discuss of interesting, engaging academic subjects. Debate over things, especially girls who have opinions and stay by them. Just not a girls that's just there...Without thinking. So work your mind! It will serve you well, and it is attractive!

2) Closed Minded

This somewhat relates to the first point, but there is rarely more offputting things in a conversation with a girl who has general, generic, boring beliefs that most people share. AND most of all annoying are girls who are just not open to discussion about it! That don't like to discuss, or think that you are a terrible person for sharing different ideal.That don't like to see the other end of the spectrum, or try to think differently about certain things. In short I like if a girls agrees to disagree and be open about it! None of us has to comply! Just be alright with my beliefs and I will be with yours.

3) Offended easily

SO, I concede this may be somewhat personal but GIRLS!

I make fun of white people, and black people, and grey people and every person I meet around, I make fun of physical attributes, and celebrities, and all political figures! MOST of all I make fun of my buddies and girlfriends and most of all myself! I make fun of everyone and everything alright. I like all humor weather it is weird or stupid etc.... I believe you can make fun of everything if you want to. I don't force girls to laugh, but there's no need to take offense, and if you do it's OK to be offended. Don't be Closed Minded, laugh along for god's sake, don't be a grump about it (depression isn't an attractive quality either BTW)

4) Indecisive (Big one)

This really is hard to perceive so let me just demonstrate it in a conversation.

Guy: " You want to go out tonight!?"

Girl" HEu sure ok."

Guy: "What do you want to do?"

Girl: "I don't know..."

Guy: "Tell me we can do anything!"

Girl: "I don't know, whatever you want to do."

Guy: "O.K Then... Let's get something to eat, what do you want to eat?"

Girl: "I don't know..."

Guy: "WELL what do you like? you like Chinese, you want sushi, or steak, you wanna hang out and order pizza!?"

Girl: "He I don't know, I'm not sure."

Guy: "Well then, you want to do something else then."

Girl: "Sure I guess, I don't really know."

So for the last one as you see in the example, it's something innocent that girls do more than often. And it's something they don't realize. Someone being decided and excited about doing stuff is crucial. I mean sure we all have our bad days when we don't want..to do anything etc, but it's pretty much about everything else as well. Girls BE ASSERTIVE, tell guys "Let's do that", or "Yea that sounds great", "YES that seems fun"..."I saw this place out let's check it out!", or "No I don't feel like doing anything, is that cool with you?" That's fine as well. But just don't be a drag when you are presented with options...If you want to do it say it, if you don't say that to...Because then we guys feel like we're forcing you, or you don't want anything etc, and it's really a deal breaker. Enthusiasm is a powerful tool to be engaging and interesting towards guys and in life in general it's duper attracting.

[redeyemindtricks]

Nicely done.
Tbh I was expecting this one to be an eye-roller when I first saw the title, but... pretty much agreed with all of it.

The only part with which I'd take exception is yr use of the word "academic" in point no. 1.
In that point, you're talking about a more general, PRACTICAL type of "intelligence"... which, unlike "book smarts", is something that actually **matters** in the world, as I wrote here (girl's mho):
www.girlsaskguys.com/.../q1997484-do-extremely-intelligent-guys-want-girls-who-are-equally-intelligent
That kind of intelligence ^^ has little or nothing to do with academics -- and, in fact, people who put too much weight on academic credentials are usually sorely lacking in REAL, critical-thinking intelligence.

Otherwise... Yeah.

[Bluemax]

You've piqued my curiosity. What would have made you roll your eyes?

I agree with the academic thing. I kind of take exception to no. 2. If anything, I have found the term "close minded" gets tossed around too much. I've encountered too many people who think that requiring evidence makes you close minded. I don't think not being alright with a person's beliefs doesn't necessarily make one closed minded.

[Bluemax]

Oh, I think no. 3 is more egregious than no. 4.

[redeyemindtricks]

@Bluemax "You've piqued my curiosity. What would have made you roll your eyes?"
^^ oh, stuff like "acting bitchy" (which is all too often conflated with simply standing up for herself), dropping a well-timed f-bomb every nowandthen, wearing "provocative" clothes, etc.

happy bday by the way, when was it? (I think you were still listed as 48 last time I saw a post of yours)

[Bluemax]

I noticed you use the words bitch and bitchy in quotation marks a lot. This has also piqued my curiosity. What constitutes an actual bitch, as opposed to a "bitch"?

Thank you my birthday was at the end of January. I spent my birthday taking care of my 82 year old mother. Don't be jealous. ;)

[YourFutureEx]

Happy belated birthday @Bluemax :) stay strong!

[redeyemindtricks]

@Bluemax The quote marks are for (1) the all-too-frequent situations in which we're branded as "bitches" for the same kind of comportment for which men would be *praised* as "no-nonsense", "all business", "tough love", etc., and (2) those situations where a woman is... coolly persuasive enough that it honestly scares people (both men and women with less of a presence), and so "... bitch" is the only retort they can think of to save face in comparison to her because frankly they're intimidated.

No. 2 is sadly similar to the situations in which people screech "sluttttt!" at a woman who actually dares to benefit from her sexuality -- simply because they know she has that *power* over them, and they don't like that one bit.

[lucasnabizada]

Whoa so much heat over here lmao... I agree with most of what all of you said by the way, obviously there are some bold statements that I mistakenly made in the take, thanks for pointing them out.

[redeyemindtricks]

oh lol no prob... just to recap, my main point is that I *liked* the take (... and was pleasantly surprised by it, compared to what I've seen in lots of other pieces with titles like this one).

[Belgie]

The issue with 4 is that SHE WANTS YOU TO TAKE CHARGE.

MAKE A DECISION, BOY.

What you find frustrating, is equally frustrating to her. She wants you to man up and make a decision.

You're not doing her any favours by prevaricating, refusing to make one, and keep bringing choices to her.

On some things, of course she will want to be consulted and her opinion valued. But on other things, like what to do for dinner? She just wants you to make a decision.

[datgirl]

Yup! !! You got it

[Atlas67890-]

Something I noticed pertaining to #1 whenever I see this crap on daytime tv.

Some dude on the street: "Yea, I like smart girls!"

The part you don't see *in walks four mildly fat, not so pretty chicks, super awkward and bland conversation ensues.*

"Well what did you guys think of our smart girls? All of them were Ph. D candidates in their respective fields."

i.ytimg.com/vi/kLFhyrG-TZ0/maxresdefault.jpg

"New study shows men actually DON'T like smart women." *snicker snicker from the snarky women on tv* "heh men are intimidated, yea girrrrl power!"

Dear media outlets "Smart" doesn't mean take an already hot chick slap some glasses and a lab coat on her (*See Google 'Smart girls.') and boom 'smart girl.' Genuinely intelligent women are usually very average looking with a mild case of social ineptitude. The chick from Mythbusters, or passive aggressive Abby from NCIS are anomalies... a fantasy created by... YOU the media. Thats like trying to find a hot, rich guy who isn't an asshole, cheater, abuser, alcoholic etc. rant over.

[JulieXO]

I'm confused about the third paragraph. You say it's unnecessary and unattractive to be offended, and in the next sentence you say it's okay to be offended. AI might have misunderstood it, but it seems a bit incoherent.
In my opinion, it's perfectly fine not to laugh about certain things. For example, it would be very understandable if somebody with jewish ancestory wouldn't find holocaust jokes funny.
You also mention that depression "isn't an attractive quality". Depression is an illness, not a quality. It's like saying somebody's unattractive because they have coeliac disease.

[lucasnabizada]

You're right.. Particularly bad wording on my part...
What I meant in the beginning of the paragraph was that it's unattractive for a girl to be a grump and be offended all the time (being stuck up)... And what I said after is , if they are offended however, 'it's Ok.'. As in they can be offended I don't personally care and they don't have to make a whole scene about it and call me out on it

[Anonymous]

if he's the one asking her to do something why isn't he figuring out what to do? Why not just pick something... makes you look indecisive too. Why not say Hey want to get pizza tonight? Or let's go dancing that is sexy as hell asking me to hang out then telling me to plan it is a buzz kill and then I'm left trying to figure out what you wanted because you asked so you must have had something in mind... makes me beat my brain until I don't even want to go out at all. hate that. Either figure it out or don't ask-lol. I hate that.

[lucasnabizada]

Well why is it to the guy to find ideas! Why shouldn't girls be just as implicated... That's exactly my point... Indecisive also applies to, "Are you in this relationship or not?"... For once I DON'T KNOW LOL... Otherwise maybe you'd be more implicated, especially in long term... There is also the sense where even if you propose something specific, you may still get the good old "I Don't know"...

[Opinion Owner]

Well then he shouldn't be asking if she wants to go out tonight if he doesn't know what he wants to do... that's indecisive. Me asking him to go out tonight and then saying "Oh well what do you want to do" is the same. If you ask someone to hang out they usually figure you know what you want to do being that it was after all your idea. So to ask someone waht to do after you asked them to hang out is not them being indecisive it's then being put on the spot and you being lazy because you don't know what you want to do so they are trying to figure that out. Just say what you want or wait for them to say they want to hang out and have a suggestion or say I'd love to hang out but I'm all out of ideas... have any? The way guys ask make it seem like they know but then they through it in your court to make the decision for them and are mad when you can't...

[Opinion Owner]

It's up to the guy to figure it out if he asks her to go out... it's not if she asks him... I don't think that's a hard concept to get.

[Anonymous]

I'm 100% agree with 1, 2 and 4. Number 3 depends. If people general gets pissed off for everything and saying my opinion in a polite way is enough to make them explode, I would find it annoying for instance.

But I thinks people should be allowed to have a limit of what they thinks is acceptable and I doesn't find that turn off. If the humor gets too sexist, racist etc. I thinks they should be allowed to be a bit upset. If you gives a explanation to them and apologize, they may stop being upset and maybe it's just a misunderstanding in the conversation. Anyway, in most cases (From my experience) people have a good reason to react. E. g. to dark humor or bad words like the n-word. Reacting isn't the same as SJW or certain communities that have a "I get offended for everything" culture.

[Anonymous]

For the Indecisive things is just because guys after complain that they always have to do what the girls want and not the other ways around.
or he said no I don't like that, always complaining and saying he doesn't like this and that so what can the girl say? Just let the guys propose and after choose on the choice he give.
I also hate a guys who can't be assertive and choose by himself a good place to bring me. After I have to do all the work.

And what do you do with girls who are really not that smart? You just think they play dumb?

[MrNameless]

For me, having a similar sense of humor is huge. They don't have to laugh at all my jokes.. But if they don't laugh at any of them and say to me,"ok, that joke wasn't funny" like its something I do preplanned and just to impress her, then its a major killer.

[Anonymous]

Intelligence.. hmm... i tried that, and to be honest... mostly high flying career women tended to be the most annoying and difficult to deal with. Finally met a girl who was FLORIST and she turned out the be the most sweetest and amazing women in my life. I married her and love everyday with her. Intelligence doesn't turn me off or on, but in my experience women who seem too intelligent get annoying after a while. but each to their own

[lucasnabizada]

Be Carefull... I didn't technically said she has to be a great academic, I just said that I like a girl to be opened to subjects and have intelligible conversation

[AleDeEurope]

I agree, especially #3. I hate it when a girl gets offended easily. I have a dark humor, if you're not into making offensive jokes about everyone including yourself, you're lame xD

[Prof_Don]

Offended easily is THE worst! This woman I was casually talking to suddenly became uber feminist and started mincing my words saying how I was being sexist when I cracked a causal joke.

Had to end things because I couldn't take that anymore.

[YaBaba]

Number 3 is kind of confusing.
I have met some guys who get offended easily, but then also doesn't like it if I do the same when they get me angry.

[Iraqveteran666]

The first 3 make a woman undatable. No4 I gotta say is just universal in most women, even when the are decisive they spend their time second guessing and then regretting theiron choice. If you can avoid being drawn in you are golden.

[EmiliaB]

1 out of 4 isn't so bad! I drive my partner crazy ( not in the good way) with the last one, but he's used to it now. He'll even joke about it.

[SovereignessofVamps]

Well... I do think lots of guys would hate this, but not all guys! Tons love bitches or girls who are 'weird'.

[YourFutureEx]

We don't love bitches, we just love sex :P

[SovereignessofVamps]

No, the guys I've seen chase the bitches to date them srsly.

[realperson02]

Lmao :) i would like to add something to #4 which happened to me
Me : Would like to grab some coffee with me in the evening?
girl: i"ll ask my mom and reply

[JensonStatement]

#6. Get in to a fight with an 6'9'' guy and expect your boy to fix it.

Never do this.

[KatherineJ]

The last one is a hint that we want YOU to lead us. Make a decision!

[cth96190]

#5: Feminism.

[RichardWilson]

I agree

[lucasnabizada]

LMAO... Yea don't worry about that. I'm pretty able to scan people at a first glance... A feminist wouldn't even approach me and neither would I lmao...

[maria96]

Do you understand that feminism is just the belief that men and women should have equal rights and opportunities, and has nothing to do with humiliating men, anger towards bras and unshaved armpits?

[lucasnabizada]

@maria96 LOL THE MERE fact that you had to clarify it just demonstrates that it's exactly what it is! Feminism is against women... It's trying to victimize women, and to spread delusions about the society that just AREN'T true... Struggling to push forward differences and discrepancies that just AREN'T THERE... Not anymore... Women can go to college and pretty much do anything that I any man can do.. More women graduate from college, more women are in the work force, they get paid just as well as men in accordance with the line of work they go into, which explains why they may or may not get paid more or less than certain men in other fields of work! And employers are urging to employ women! So I don't see what is the problem here. What I see is that feminism is a lying, pityfull, sexist institution that is only aimed at women who are unhappy, fat, miserable, or unfulfilled, and make them able to go and blame all their situation and problems on men..

[RichardWilson]

@maria96 Feminists turn a simple, "How are you?" Or "You look nice" into a sexual harassment lawsuit. Watch that 10 hours of harassment in NYC. Only 2 minutes of encounters with men and only 2 incidents of actual harrasment. Feminism is a propaganda movement designed to make men look like pigs. You guys should consider yourselves lucky to live in the US and not in the Middle East where women are treated like animals. The only feminist cause I support is the breast feeding in public.

[maria96]

I see where you're coming from - I agree that women have accomplished a lot and earned more space in society since the 60's. But what you need to understand is that the existence of women is not limited to wherever you live in Australia. An extreme example would be girls in Africa that are not allowed to study or have their sexual organs mutilated. A closer example would be my life in Brazil: people are still very sexist here, think that women should submit to their men - if you're any different than that, people will insult you and exclude you. I am very happy, very fit, very pretty and have an amazing boyfriend. And that doesn't stop me for wanting women to have equal rights all around the world. I know that it's hard to think that there are people with different life situations around the world, but you should give it a try ;)

[maria96]

@richardwilson like in any other belief, there are people who will make it extreme and ruin its name What you're talking about is what we call "feminazis". Do you actually believe that all Muslims are terrorists? Do you think that every white Catholic is a member of the KKK? Yeah, me neither. I'm a feminist and I cook for my boyfriend, I look feminine and I don't think men are pigs. The only thing that I want is for women to follow their dreams and have the same rights as men!

[lucasnabizada]

@maria96@maria96 Sure that's perfectly valid arguments.. But the matter of a fact is that organized feminists don't care about this anymore... At least none of what iv'e seen of it! You may be attached to those issues But I guarentee you that any ACCLAIMED feminist will be more inclined to point out how unequal they are to men, and why they won't be considered as respectfully, when in fact they are doing that to themselves by engaging in those sorts of thinking.. And in that sense I don't think they can do much good for anyone... Including in areas where there are ACTUAL gender discrepancies... You may not be one of them... But that's what feminists are engaged in here and now.. Not actually doing anything useful other than propagate hate

[cth96190]

@maria96
FYI the Klan was/is anti-Catholic.
Catholics were/are excluded from membership.

[Mrwoo99]

I also don't want to see retard feminazi syndrome...

[Anonymous]

Numbers 2 and 3 are the worst. Women who are closed minded and easily offended typically become feminists, and we all know that no one likes a feminist.

[art84]

Indecisive would a major turn off for me if a girl couldn't make up her mind.