SHY AT THE CLUB
You're Part of a Tribe
Some shy people find it easier to socialize at a club where music is blaring and they can be lost in the crowd. This is a good instinct to have because, in reality, you're all ideally sharing a moment together as strangers who just want to have fun and blow off steam. Thinking that you walk into a club and everyone is staring at you is the opposite of the truth unless you are dressed or are acting outlandishly. In reality, the hardest part of being at the club is getting noticed.
This is an important mindset for shy people to have because they can so easily feel awkward and like everyone is expecting them to "feel it" and start dancing and/or vibing to the music and the stimulation coming at them. It's true that people may notice if you feel awkward but they're not looking for you to perform some great social miracle, but simply join in on the fun.
For Girls, Guys Will Try To Separate You From Your Friends
I'm always shocked to see how many guys have developed maneuvers to get girls alone. I'll be with a group of female friends and one guy in a group will ingratiate himself with me while the others "work the girls." Then one will inevitably try to move the girl elsewhere in the club.
Coming from the side of the approaching guy, the biggest reason men tend to do this at the club is because friends can "cockblock" simply by observing their friend talking to another guy. Many girls won't want to do much more than light conversation while there friends are watching and it's almost impossible to get a make out with them two feet away staring judgementally in their friends direction. Furthermore, girls are jealous and if you look like you're about to make out with her, they will swoop in and all will be lost as they declare that they're intervening to "save" their friend.
The only thing a shy girl really needs to ask herself is if she feels attracted to this guy because he will more than likely pressure her to leave with him to "another club" or "to get food across the street with his friends." If the shy girl is not feeling him she can't give the guy an inch because she probably won't be able to handle the social pressure she's going to have to get with him.
For Guys, You Will Get Rejected Every Single Night You Go Out
Assuming you approach girls in the first place which a lot of guys don't. The reasons are many--it's the start of the night and she can't go home with you because she just started her night with her girls, cockblocks, boyfriend around the corner, you're not her type, she's not drunk enough, she's too drunk, you were too needy, you were too standoffish, you didn't get that she has a "hot bitch" persona and weren't able to handle the attitude, she saw you talking to other girls before her, etc. etc. etc.
Harsh rejections like drinks in the face usually only happen when you're drunk and out of control. This is why a lot of guys who go out constantly learn to either drink very little or don't drink at all. In general, even if you come off as super creepy she will say she has a boyfriend or that she needs to go to the bathroom or that her friends are leaving.
Get used to it and learn to dive in without thinking it through. Your mind will always be nervous because you're a shy person. Don't be Johnny Bravo, learn from your mistakes and don't be that guy just trolling for chicks, but also don't be too scared when moments present themselves which they do all night every night if you are willing to acknowledge them. As a shy person, you will actually need to get rejected MORE than the regular guy to realize it's not so bad and a lot of times it's pretty good. The good news is, as a shy person, just having a good conversation with an attractive girl means a lot more to you than it is to a guy who talks to everyone and is solely focused on getting laid.
Don't Be Jealous
Whether you're a guy or a girl, it's tempting in the club to be jealous. Jealous of the girl who every guy is staring at, jealous of your friends, jealous of the fact that you can't get into the best club on the block and are stuck at the mediocre one or for the guys jealous of your friend's success, jealous of other guys at the club doing better, jealous even of hot women who don't have to even try and run the club while you who's probably a lot smarter than she is are getting destroyed etc.
"lol just had to use a picture entitled "extremely happy Asian guy at the club" twice
As a shy person, the fact that you're at the club is tremendous growth. Your friends will know this even if you aren't the most fun person to club with since you have trouble "letting go." Think this way though--you suck now but you won't suck forever and the only limit to how good you can be at the club is how much you care to take it...
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