Why Many Men Are Upset about Paying on the First Date (Page 2)
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"My suggestion for this phenomenon is to listen to each other and COMPROMISE."
This!
A working and healthy relationship cannot exist without that. Obviously some women aren't willing to compromise on the first date, so that is trouble avoided right in the beginning ;)
This mytake is on the point!
I'd add to it, that 4. Gender roles. It's sexist, stupid and outdated. It harms both men and women as a whole.
then men should pay just as much tiem and money on their physical appearance as women
I think for many men they pay much more than women if we count the gym and supplements
Who says men aren't spending money to impress women on dates? New haircuts, new clothes, cologne, etc.
And nobody is demanding women to wear make up or wear pricey clothing. That's on you.
@MrNameless since when is dating a competition on who makes the most effort.
@eyesofdesire It's not supposed to be a competition on who makes the most effort but you know, if I had to build up the courage to ask a woman out, plan the date, possibly pick her up, decide where to go, start a conversation and lead the conversation, pay the bill then possibly drive her back home... you know, I think it's fair that women put in more effort because men go through a lot. I don't think you understand what men have to go through. As far as I'm concerned many women just stand there, get asked out, picked up and sit down at a table following a conversation with getting a free meal. That's nothing.
@dontknow12 but you don't want men to have to do all that extra stuff. so in that case, men have to equalize with apperance
G-Daz women go to the gym and use supplements too
Opinion Owner, that is the most ridiculous excuse to claim that men should pay for you...
Seriously, who is telling you to spend all this money on flashy make up products and clothes and get your hair done for 3 hours? Just be modest and present yourself in a natural matter. You're not owed anything because you decided to enhance your looks.
Love all the pink anons who talk bs on this site. Seems to me that they are upset their free rides are over. You will have equality as we men will enforce it. You don't treat us as an equal, bye! Game over.
Oh.. and don't get upset when you "fall" for the a PUA because he gives you what you want.. . then hits it 'n quits it. That's what you entitled to...
Very few women go to the gym and take it seriously... for every girl there is 10-20 guys honestly... and only 1/10 girls at the gym i see actually take stuff.. don;t use that pathetic argument.
@TheUsername27 Hah you think women don't have to do anything to look good? Men don't even know when we are wearing makeup or not. (Unless it's like full face) Shaving, getting hair and nails done etc. Also plastic surgery is more common among women.
In reality men put far more effort into dating than women. Dating for women is fun, not for men
@Chrystald And because of your decision to look good, men must pay for your time?
@Lopezz1999 Lol how about they show us what they really look like... and save money at the same time... these pathetic females put problems on themselves. I'm glad their all insecure.
@Chrystald Unattractive women have to work hard to look good.
@Lopezz1999 bc men won't go on a second date with women if women don't appease men's visual senses, women won't go on a second date with men if men don't appease women's gustatory senses (sense of taste). that's equality
@TheUsername27 And poor men have to work for their money.
No, women won't go on second dates with men if they're not attracted. They will however, lead them on by going on more dates, for free food solely because he's paying for her.
the usual nonsense from the 18 to 24 special snowflake and entitled women.
@Lopezz1999 I'd say this is true for some but not all. I would never go on a second date with someone I wasn't interested in. Also, the first date if I wasn't interested, I would pay for my own meal. If I am interested, I pull out my card, fully willing to pay but the gentleman I'm with says no and pays the tab, I pay the tip.
I do have a friend who will date for free food.
@Krystal821 Are you saying that if you were interested, you'd either pay for both him and yourself, or not pay for the date at all?
The thing is though, you're generous. Many women out there will not care to pay for themselves, if they don't find their date attractive, unlike you. If a woman is willing to pay for herself, she cares enough about the guy since she'd rather not see him dry. Others, don't care.
@Krystal821 Yeah that's a nice view to have. For me i will pay on the first... but after that i would expect her to pay for her own food. On the first date if she didn't offer/made it quite clear that she wasn't going to pay for her stuff no matter what... It would raise a red flag and i may debate seeing her again.
But I'm not some ego driven guy who would get angry if she wanted to pay for her stuff on the first date (honestly i think girls make this shit up to justify letting men pay).
Naw, bullshit. If a guy can't pitch in for a coffee or a cocktail to talk for an hour he's a putz. You guys can work it out after that if you really like him.
in my opinion it all depends on financial security. If a guy has a lot of money he sure as hell doesn't care about dropping a few bucks for entertainment. At this point that's all you are, so no big deal. If it's gonna be a regular thing and you want the rest of the package then you gotta pitch in as well.
i understand that it's a loss if it doesn't lead to what they want and that some women take advantage of that. i would be angry if that happened to me a lot.
the question is what does the guy want it to lead to? so many seem to push for drinks because they think it'll lead to sex. they find excuses for why they can't go to the zoo, aquarium, ice-skating, or cinema.
I will only buy Her a soda and chips or subway for lunch one time only while dating. I only spend money on my woman. Girlfriend and boyfriend are for 2nd graders. I desire a wife. After a week or so you should both know if you want to get married or not.
paying for the pussy
@BubbleBoy69: Don't have too. Even if I had too, I still won't pay or kiss butt to get some vagina. Many women want to sleep with me but I reject due to my religion.
A lot of women abuse this just to get a free dinner. It also gets girl to overvalue their worth on the sexual marketplace. Guys are turning this on its head and will only accept equality.
judging by the downvotes women only think they should get equal rights.
@timesplittersxsxd every down vote is from a bigoted sexist lol
yes that is right
I tend to pay on the first date and anytime after when i go on a date with a man or woman. It's just how I am, and I enjoy it.
I would pay IF there was gender inequality regarding pay. But the fact that there isn't, women similarly nowadays get paid more than men for the same job with a bias towards them.
If i pay for a woman on a date, i better be guaranteed sex for it
Well said
It's just an old tradition and yes most of us like it. Men have their own expectations for women, it's only fair. If women had lower beauty standards like men, maybe...
Of course you like it you're getting free meals.
Their expectations don't involve getting free stuff... what a pathetic argument... and lower beauty standards? what does that even mean
I'm sure you guys only care about personality (=pretty face, skinny waist, wide hips, big boobs) And yep, women, we are pure evil. We want someone taller than us (about average man height) and financially secure with ambitions.
Unmatching big boobs or any wide waist can be turn offs. Most guys prefer a petite body on women, a body that most women have but are still nevertheless, insecure about, since they believe that big boobs or a thigh gap can more easily attract men. You're right about one thing though, women do have much higher standards.
Men have lower beauty standards?
Six pack abs, 6ft tall height, big bank account, big penis are not low standards.
No we don't only care about looks. Only guys looking for a hook up care about looks. A guy who wants a long term relationship cares more about looks, and if you want financial stability then you can start with yourself before expecting it out of other men.
You stick to your gender roles and we will stick to ours. And womens standards are fairy tale.
Anyway all you really show, is that men are the better of the two genders and it is up to us to correct women.
@dontknow12 EXACTLY! Real guys are looking for other attributes other than a pretty face... Real guys actually are suspicious of beautiful women as they tend to take advantage of your average guy. They have been manipulating since they were young to get whatever they want. Plus they are usually vain and boring as they never develop their own personalities. I'm generalizing of course. There are exception to every rule. There a ugly ducklings who don't they've turned into beautiful swans after their awkward teens and early teens. We are all on the look out for these "unicorns."
I'm a traditional man so I'm not at all upset over paying the bill I prefer it.
If anything were to piss me off about it, it would be a woman's attitude towards it.
Do any of you men on here get any pride in providing for a woman? If you invited a woman out for a coffee/tea, would you not think it demeaning and disrespectful for a woman not to give you the opportunity or accept your offer to pay gratefully?
Well no because it is not the 1950's and women do have more opportunities in employment and they are earning an income like men. In this day, I would never consider a relationship with a women who never offer to pay half over someone who demands I pay for the entire date regardless of the price. It shows what type of person you are at the end of the day.
There's a limit. Providing for a woman is cool and all but you women like to take it for granted and expect us to pay for all your expenses. You don't have the ability to understand that from a man's point of view because no one expects you to spend money on anybody.
@dontknow12 Do you speak for me and all women? Of course you don't. I've never heard such bullshit lol. Your ignorance is astounding.
"We don't have the ability to understand because no-one expects you to spend money on anybody?" If you think every woman is an entitled princess then I feel sorry for you for having such close-minded, damaging judgement. You need start dating different women mate, and changing your mindset.
Of course not every women is an entitled brat, but I've seen a lot, like way more than I should be. I have every reason to say what I say. You have any idea how many men bust their ass to look good for women so they would pick them? I'm just saying compared to us, you got it easy.
@dontknow12 AMEN brother! Just the way she brushed off your post speaks volumes on her mindset. I noticed "pay gratefully" like we should be "honored" to be in her presence. She'll never see your point of view. There's a reason why she a pink anon... the most fearless of SJW!
@Tony1974 Exactly, do you see the way women think? These females act like they're above the world because they have a vagina that pushes out babies.
"Do any of you men on here get any pride in providing for a woman?"
Of course. But I'm not gonna provide for someone who I can't say for sure isn't going to throw away my number after the date and brag to her friends about the free meal she got out of me.
I only feel used when paying for a women, all the guys i know also don't want to pay.
Amen brother! The Misandry and hypocrisy is outstanding. You know you have great take when the Pink Anons come out in droves!!!
Great post!
notice the identical age range.
If only they got a complimentary blowjob then they maybe they might nott be so upset about it :-P, especially if it was a really expensive date at a expensive restaurant or anything really expensive.
They should be grateful I'm giving them the time of day, much less agreeing to a date. Honestly guys, show you're a man and do what's expected of you.
And what about you? Will you act like a lady?
Entitlement issue here, you're not that special
@FýrdracaDócincel
#NotYourServant if that's what you mean
I'm not that special? Seems to me they're the ones who have to do the asking
If that's true then I won't be yours. See how that works out?
You're easily replaceable
Nice comment Opinion Owner. And I'd suppose you'd say the same thing for someone that you're actually attracted to?
@FýrdracaDócincel
No problem, one guy doesn't work out, I've got a dozen more guys to choose from at a moment's notice
@Lopezz1999
Why wouldn't I?
Replaceable? lol, you think we don't know that most men don't value us? They want stuff from us -- sex for the men, affection for the cucks. If you want it, pay up
Woah there little lady. If you can't be expected to value us, you can't expect the guys who are worth it to value you.
So by that logic, he's entitled to a blow job from you.
Take the plastic crown off, 'princess.' You're an adult now. He took the time out of his day to agree to date you too.
Because, since you are attracted to the guy, you wouldn't be saying this. You wouldn't mind paying for yourself (or yourself and him) if you were attracted to him. You are not attracted to any guy who'd you'd say would be grateful that you, a girl, is spending time with him. That's just too obvious, and it's one of the reasons why he won't be paying for you.
You know you are bitchy when you have to be an anon when you post that comment.
Until you don't. Good luck facing the wall my dear. it's coming faster for you all these days. Men are wising up.
Most arrogant bitch on the site found lol.
@Words_and_Wisdom
No he's not entitled to a blowjob. He's got to prove he's worth even *considering*
@Lopezz1999
Lolz, get that BS from a PUA website?
@Tony1974
Sure. Good luck getting the average, desperate cuck to hold the line and not pursue sex. Until then, I can have things exactly how I want them.
@TheUsername27
Offended by reality, are you?
No, Opinion Owner.
That's it.. show everyone what women truly think of men.. IF they don't already know.
SMH. You're exhibit A on why men should stay away from MOST women.
cough cough literal prostitute!
"sex for the men, affection for the cucks. If you want it, pay up" Is your dad dead or do you just hate him? that's why you are a whore/prostitute right?
@amphet11
Men are transactional. I don't pretend for a second that a man cares about me or any other women. So why jeopardize my well-being by falsely believing they are capable of love?
Men want sex, the cucks want affection. They WANT things FROM me. So if they're going to be that way, then I'll be transactional too. If you want something, pay up. On my terms.
@Tony1974
Men are sociopathic. It'd be good for other women to come to terms with that. Either avoid men entirely, or get what we want by being shrewd and transactional.
Don't like women thinking this way? Then stop being psychopaths.
So you don't want sex and affection from men? you asexual and aromantic? Well you have admitted you are whore/prostitute now. That just leaves my question, is your dad dead, or do you just hate him?
@amphet11 Damn. 0_0
You should show you are a woman and not voice an opinion because when you do you make yourself a laughing stock. And why should we be grateful you are so arrogant and conceited, us men would be grateful if women like you did not exist. Pleased this has the most dislikes I've ever seen from one gender. You nothing important and you are worth losing and you comment shows you exactly what men think of you, Noticed you had to hide behind anonymity as well.
'If you want it pay up' so basically you are a prostitute then, well ok but do you have any change for a fiver.
Your th psychopath by the way.
@amphet11 Her dad probably raped her that is most probably why she hates men. Sad
@amphet11
I admit to being shrewd and transactional. Seems to me you want to offload male sociopathic violence on to women. Easier to call them shores, rather than admit they're being smart for adjusting to male behavior.
*whores.
Stupid auto correct.
@timesplittersxsxd
You sound frightened. Upset that the reality of how women view men isn't what you fantasized it being?
Men aren't heroes swooping down to give us love and save us from all the dangers of life. Men are predators... or cucks. If a woman wants to make her way in the world, she needs to do it with her eyes open.
"I admit to being shrewd and transactional. Seems to me you want to offload male sociopathic violence on to women. Easier to call them shores, rather than admit they're being smart for adjusting to male behavior." Even if all of that is true, it's not mutually exclusive to you literally being a prostitute. You yourself describe it a transactional, do you not understand simple semantics? You are agreeing with me! Anyway you still haven't answered my question, is your dad dead or do you just hate him?
wow... who hurt you?
i am really concerned about your mental here, I was feeling the same way about women recently "women are out to get me or they just want my money" or worse "women will always reject for not being worthy enough..." or even "all women are evil and not worth my time" I felt this way to a few unfortunate events in my life but this does not exclude all women. why do you find men wanting affection to be cucks? and reducing males to sex drive makes them men?
Since this site has failsafes and I can report you if things get too dicey, wanna talk it out with me? I think we could both stand to benefit. I don't want any affection or sex from you. All you have to do is talk and I will listen. interested? If not then may I suggest the resources from the company called "the school of life"? They are a British company with a website if you want to buy their books (really great stuff) if you don't want to pay, the have a youtube channel discussing a whole variety of topics in little snippets.
Because some men are unemployed, broke and bitter about it.
I don't mind paying; we're definitely not going to the Ritz for a first date anyway.
Basically, I don't mind paying. Of like you I'll fight doomsday for you. But now if you expect me to do stuff for you to "prove" that I like you. Than fuk you
Either split the bill or "I pay this time, you pay next time."
I'm so sick of this bullshit. Any man who doesn't pay for dates is a pussy. End of story.
Women were born to be gold diggers so their entitled behavior to a man's money is nothing surprising. Just another day in the female world.