Skinny vs. Buff Men: Who Gets More Women?

[Anonymous]

This has been a long debated question.

Who gets more women? Skinny guys or buff guys?

This is the question that has forum sites, like this one, at war because they skinny guys are complaining about how girls always go with the bad ass "buff" dude and the buff guys are complaining about how in the hell that skinny guy from down the street stole his girl. You can't really trust the girls on GAG, with the exception of a few, (sorry ladies) because either they are too young to be giving you advice on the matter or they don't want to hurt your feelings. I am going to settle this with a mixture of facts and experiences. Let's get into it.

CNN.com has an article about the issue (yes, I know CNN isn't the most reliable source, but at times they do provide some credible sources.), that says "recent findings by Vinet Coetzee of the University of Pretoria in South Africa simply suggest women might subconsciously focus first on a man's weight -- or lack thereof -- before rejecting him for other reasons." Now, this doesn't prove whether or not women prefer skinny men or muscular men, but it does prove the fact that weight is a major factor of how women will perceive you. So whether you are skinny or you are muscular, weight is an important factor to whether a women will reject you or not. Let's first get into why skinny guys tend to get girls.

Why Skinny Guys Get Girls

1. The obvious reason, they are simply attracted to skinny guys

This is very obvious, but it needs to be listed. Some girls are just simply attracted to skinny guys. There is no real reason behind it, but they are simply attracted to them. Nothing more to be said.

2. They have a different interpretation of the word "skinny"

Different girls will have different interpretations of the word "skinny". Some mix the word skinny with scrawny, some make skinny and scrawny two separate things, and others say that there are three categories; scrawny, skinny, and lean. I'm going to use myself as an example. About two days ago, I posted a question on GAG asking whether or not girls like guys who have "noodle arms" (aka, guys who are scrawny) using this picture of myself:

Pretty much every comment I got said that I didn't have noodle arms. Also, pretty much every girl said that they would date a guy who had noodle arms. I was flattered with the compliments (I wasn't fishing for compliments) because I was always the skinny guy in school and I still am today. In the fitness industry, this would be considered skinny, scrawny almost. Girls, however, see it differently. Some see it as scrawny and others see it as muscular. It's all about how they view it.

3. They don't feel obligated to go workout

A lot of girls date skinny guys because they believe that if they date a buff dude, then that dude will always make her workout with him. Personally, if I was buff, I wouldn't care if you were to workout with me or not because I would have friends that would workout with me. Because of the girl not wanting to workout, they feel that they need a guy who also doesn't workout so she wouldn't feel pressured to go workout.

4. Having a boyfriend that is skinnier than she is will make her feel better about herself

I hear a lot about how girls won't date attractive guys because it will make her look bad, so they date unattractive guys. This is kind of the same thing for skinny guys. Girls feel like the will feel better and look better if they date a guy who's skinny. This is pretty sad if you ask me, and if you're currently dating a girl who's only dating you to make herself look better than you should cut ties with her.

5. They believe that a skinny guy is the best they can get

Some girls feel like the best thing they can get is a scrawny guy. Now, I'm not trying to put down skinny guys, hell I'm a skinny guy myself, but some girls feel like that is the best they can do. It's like when you see a hot girl with a really ugly guy. It's not because because he's rich or she's trying to screw him so she can get a better position at her job, it might be because she believes that that is the best guy she can get. Or it's because he has a cool personality, but lets leave out the ladder for a moment.

Next, I'm going to get into why girls would like buff guys.

Why Buff Guys Get Girls

1. The girl loves to exercise

There are girls out there who love exercising. So because of that passion, they want a guy who has a similar passion and those guys are the buff guys.

2. They simply are attracted to buff guys

Just like some girls are attracted to skinny guys, other girls are simply attracted to buff guys. They simply like their muscles, nothing else really to be said here.

3. They are superficial

These girls are only dating buff guys because they are shallow. They don't care for brains, only body. These girls just want a buff guy to screw because he fits their superficial personality. Please, don't date this type of girl people.

4. Being buff shows a sign of being healthy

This isn't always the case, for example body building is a very unhealthy sport, however in most cases being buff shows that you care about what you put into your body. Being healthy means that you aren't a slob, which girls like. They don't want to date slobs, they want to date healthy people.

5. Being buff means that you are better in bed

Not every buff guy is going to be good in bed, however most buff guys are going to have better stamina, which means they will last longer. That can be seen as a good thing or a bad thing. It can be a good thing if he's good in bed, but it can also be a bad thing if he's terrible at it. Ladies, please don't assume ever buff guy is good in bed.

So Who Gets More Women?

Statistically speaking, it is..... drum roll please..... muscular (buff) men that get more women. According to menshealth.com, women are attracted to muscular men. Using statistics from UCLA, they said that "A series of six studies found that muscular guys are catnip to women looking for fun, and they have twice as many partners as average Joes and weaklings." Skinny guys, don't lose hope, because we can defiantly pull women. Here is some advice I will leave with you:

My Advice

1. Find a passion

Find a passion that you love doing. Girls love guys that are driven. My passion is completing college, then joining the Army, then after my service, go back to college to get a graduate degree. Have goals in life.

2. Learn something new

Learning will make you intelligent, which women also crave. Learn about how the United States electoral college system works, or how to solve math problem using the quadratic formula, or Newton's laws of motion, o cómo hablar español (or how to speak Spanish). These are all things I've learned. I'm taking an AP American government class that taught me how our electoral college system works, both of my algebra classes and my trigonometry and functions classes have taught me how to use the quadratic formula to solve algebraic equations. My one year of physics (although painful) taught me, in detail through explanations and experiments, what Newton's three laws of motion are and how they apply in our world. Five years of Spanish taught me how to speak Spanish (not fluent yet.) You can defiantly learn new things, so pick up a book and read.

3. Workout

Hit the gym. You don't have to be buff, but you can defiantly make your body look better than it did before. Use the gym as a place to just go ape shit. Only use your phone for music. Don't call anyone, don't text anyone, don't answer anyone's calls or texts. Just get into the zone and go ham.

And this will conclude my myTake ladies and gents. Hopefully you guys got something out of this. Please feel free to leave comments! Thanks for reading!

[AleDeEurope]

A skinny or lean guy needs to be charming and funny if he wants to get girls. Sure, some girls will go for them just for his looks, cause they like skinny, but the vast majority will actually sleep with them because he charmed her, and because he's not bad looking (a nice face will also help a skinny guy).
I've been skinny all my life, and I haven't had much problem getting girls, but I know if it's between me and a muscular guy, and looks were the only thing that mattered, he would win, even if my face is more attractive than his.
Luckily I'm fairly attractive facially, and I'm quite charismatic and funny, so that helps, it's mostly why I've gotten girls, not because my body is super hot, I mean, it's not bad, I'm skinny/lean, but I know it's not the main reason I get girls lol

[PrincessPie]

I'd prefer muscly over skinny.. but i've never been out with a really ripped guy before.

[redeyemindtricks]

There are 2 things here that are MUCH more important than anything you've considered.
1, yr look needs to be consistent with the rest of yr personality, and yr vibe in general.
2, women with certain personalities tend to be more attracted to some male looks, and less attracted to others.

These should be self-explanatory, but, in order,

1/
Think about how you would type-cast characters for a Hollywood movie. What would an action hero look like -- and what personality should an action hero have? How about an in-yr-face bad guy? How about a sneaky, behind-the-scenes bad guy? How about a ruthless rich businessman? Etc etc.
Now... think about putting these characters into bodies (and/or clothes) that DON'T SUIT them... and thinking about how awkward the resulting portrayal would be.
You get me, right?
In fact, this is the essence of "creepy". The core of "creepy" is when someone's look and actual behavior don't match -- which makes it feel like "whoa shit, this is an unstable [and so possibly dangerous] person".

Now, think about casting what you're calling "buff" (LOL at that word choice, btw) vs. more slender actors. Think about the roles you'd put those boys in -- and about the personalities you'd want them to project.
The point is,
··•• if YOUR personality is TOO different from the stereotype created by yr look, then, YOU WILL DO VERY BADLY WITH WOMEN. ••··

Most notably, if you are to any extent shy or socially awkward, then, getting noticeably ripped / "buff" will almost certainly make you do EVEN WORSE with women than you were before.

And 2/
If yr dream girl is reserved, quiet, artsy, and has a personality that just isn't "intense" in general... well, this kind of woman will be much less attracted to boy bodies that scream "intensity!" and "hard-driving!".

__

Also --

Stamina/endurance is a signature trait of smaller people, actually.
Bigger bodies take more energy to power, and, so, bigger bodies get tired faster -- pretty much regardless of the activity.

More importantly, though... Physical stamina just isn't a very important trait in the bedroom. In most cases, fucking for TOO long just tends to get boring or monotonous.
When we talk about wanting a boy "who can last" in bed, what that REALLY means is, we just DON'T want a boy who shoots his load super early and then he's toast. Lol we're not talking about testing the limits of physical endurance.
So, that entire issue is irrelevant, at least in the way in which you're considering it.

[myTake Owner]

No, not really irrelevant. This take is to talk about what body girls prefer when looking into a man NOT what personality comes with it. If you were to leave out personality and girls were to simply choose what type of man's body they prefer, this is how it would be chosen on. Personality is also important which is why I included my advice at the end of the take.

[redeyemindtricks]

But you CAN'T leave that out! That's my whole point!

The point is that, if you have certain personality traits, you'll do better with the "buff" body than with the skinny one. BUT if you have certain OTHER personality traits, you'll do WORSE with the "buff" body than with the skinny one.

So, you **can't** ignore the personality traits. The question becomes meaningless and/or misleading if you do.

[myTake Owner]

Interesting point of view, but I view it more as a point system. Let's say you have a shit personality and an amazing body. Well, you'd get "points" for having an amazing body, but you wouldn't get any points for a shit personality, thus your overall apperance is going to be shit. That means a guy who has an amazing personality but an average body can take the girl. See what I'm getting at? I understand you thinking completely, but I go off of this point system.

[redeyemindtricks]

I see what you're trying to do, but it's wrong.

It's all kinds of wrong, in 2 ways actually.
1/ You're assuming that "better" and "worse" are universal, when they clearly aren't. Different women idealize different body types -- one woman's "way too skinny" or "way too buff" is another woman's "just right". (It's the same with you boys -- what's perfect for one boy could be way too big for another one, and "not enough ass" for a third one, etc)
and 2/ You're making the same assumption about personalities, too. Some women like boys who are super intense, type-A, and high-strung. Other women like boys who are way more chill. Etc.

I mean, ok fine, the ABSOLUTE WORST bodies and personalities are pretty universal. (Being super obese, and/or socially retarded or incredibly terminally shy, will disqualify you with pretty much any quality woman.) But outside of that, this idea of a "point system" is hilariously uninformed.

case in point:
• Say there's a boy whose personality is already

[myTake Owner]

Ok. I believe you. Have a nice day.

[redeyemindtricks]

pretty forward and aggressive, and this boy hits the gym (and maybe some steroids) and gets substantially more "buff".
All other things equal, THIS boy will almost certainly do BETTER with women (... unless he goes for extremely timid women, which he probably doesn't).

• Now, say there's a boy who is more soft-spoken, contemplative, artsy, and... awkward in that trendy kind of way that's OK for hipsters.
If THIS boy gets on teh same training regimen (and the same drugs) and gets just as ripped/"buff"/muscular, then, he will almost certainly do WORSE with women.
And I'm talking **significantly** worse, dude. With that kind of severe mismatch between his looks and his personality, he is going to creep women right the fuck out.
So... there goes any possibility that yr "point system" could possibly model anything that actually happens in real life.

[MrMysteryMan]

redeyemindtricks@ I love your perspectives!

[redeyemindtricks]

@MrMysteryMan Tx ♥️

[sedrftvgyhujik]

That's assuming your personality stays the same with and without muscles.

Though generally if you go through all the work to get muscular it's more for your self than for woman or anyone else.

[CubsterShura]

Yeah. Weight is important for me. I know it's a bit weird, but on a scale of 1 to 5 where
1- stick thin, underweight
2- slim but normal weight
3- neither skinny not fat, fit
4- a but chubby and healthy
5- overweight/obese

2 to 4 is my preference. Fit is hot, I don't mind a tad bit skinny or chubby they rather look cute, but no way will I date someone of an unhealthy weight. Muscles would be great but I won't mind if he doesn't have them. I honestly don't like buff because it's a bit too exaggerated... but I would love my guy anyway if he chooses to be a buff, I really don't care.

I notice a guy's dress-up more than his face or weight... I don't know what you look like because God created you that way, but even the ugliest guys look damn handsome to me when they dress well and seem well-groomed because it's definitely showing me his taste in clothes, consciousness and smartness.

Also, your picture: I felt sooo guilty staring at that picture for a long time because I have a boyfriend but daaamn... O_o o_O

[Anonymous]

I like average. Too skinny and too buff are both spoilers for me.

I don't like loose biceps, so a few weight lifts a day would be necessary. Same with thighs, trained but no bulges please.

But "ripped" like you see in movies is a turn off for me. It's so fake, and it seems uncomfortable. I mean how could you possibly move around if you are surrounded by a wall of iron-hard muscles? It's just not sexy. Just like a lot of guys that don't like girls with too much makeup or jewelry or long nails or very high heels. Sorry guys that put in so much effort into body building. Sometimes they remind me of gangsters and other such careers.

I hate big beer bellys, but I definitely hate ripped abs. Somewhere between lean and a bit of natural belly fat work for me.

I just like well built athletic guys, like marathon runners, with firm biceps or a tiny bit of bulge. But anything more is a no for me. Buff actually seems scary too. Imagine something like that in bed with you. What if he makes a wrong turn and your squished? 😅

[little_bird1]

I like skinny guys. I honestly have no idea why, I'm just really attracted to them. A little bit buffed is also good, but super buffed is a turn off for me.

All the guys I have dated were mostly skinny, so I will add some features that they all have (being):

1. Quick metabolism (they eat a lot and they don't care what they eat). I personally like this because we can always agree on what to eat.
2. They are artistic (now this is maybe just coincidence but most skinny guys I met weren't that fond of sports or physical activity, but are instead interest in art, music, video games, etc.).
3. They are tall (usually).
4. They have big dicks (this maybe just me but most skinny guys are big dicks and long "piano" fingers). It's a double pleasure.

[little_bird1]

Oh and by the way, if that's you in the first picture, I have to say that you have a really nice body, I like it. :)

[TheUsername27]

They appear to have bigger dicks due to less fat on their ''dick region pad area''. A fat dude may have 7 inches but it will look 6 inches or less depending on how much fat he has.

[little_bird1]

@TheUsername27 Maybe, but it still looks bigger, which is great. :D

[TheUsername27]

Yeah i get that. Do you like the look of them being longer or thick more? Or is it just the overall mass of it.

[mrsingle]

All 4 of your points describe me exactly! 😁

[mrsingle]

Why are long fingers good?

[Schrodingerscat]

I like skinny guys personally. Not underweight skinny but skinny with healthy weight.
i.imgur.com/1omDdDY_d.webp

I prefer the guy on left more. Many people around me have deemed this choice odd but whatevs.
Don't get me wrong, I like muscles too, but in small or moderate amount. More like... Swimmer's body.
www.poqswim.com/.../...for-a-good-swimmer-body.jpg

[Alice2398]

I really like skinny guys. Some guys who go gym are making up for something else. You can be buff as you like and still have a unattractive personality and face. Just because someone goes gym doesn't make them perfect some guys I know who work out a lot smell really bad because they're all sweaty and gross and don't have good hygiene.

I'm not saying I wouldn't date a buff guy but I don't go out looking for that type. I usually go for skinny, tall shy boys but lately I've been feeling like I should be looking for a different type of guy then what I usually go for so you never know.

[furiousrat]

I don't really understand why people assume that guys who work out are overcompensating for something. If a guy is really good at playing the guitar you don't think "oh he's clearly overcompensating, he probably has a tiny dick, that's why he plays the guitar". It doesn't make sense to me at all why people think that way about dudes that work out

[Alice2398]

@furiousrat I wasn't implying that all guys who work out had tiny dicks I meant that some do it to overcompensate something such as their looks or personality. Most guys I know who work out are lovely and are ture gentlemen so sorry if it came off as if I was bashing them, but a few of them are total pricks who think they are better than everyone else just because they have a six pack and care way to much how they look and expect everyone else to be the same.

I've always liked skinny guys it's just my personal opinion but that doesn't mean they are without a fault. No ones prefect

[Jemini_Crocket]

Here where I live, I see mainly skinny guys rocking girls, fashion... well everything. I find some of them attractive too but if I could choose between a nice slim guy and nice buff guy, I would go for the buff guy because they seem more manly to me and I simply love/prefer them.

And when I think of buff, I don't mean ripped guy. I want him to be big, not fat though.
Many ice-hockey players are big, muscular but not overly ripped.
I didn't find any full body pics but Kevin Bieksa has similar body to what I prefer the most.

[0112358]

Moderately buff and toned > jacked* > skinny toned > fat with some strength/slim* > skinny fat

More women probably like skinny toned than jacked, but there aren't many jacked guys, so they get lots of attention per capita.

More women like fat with some strength then straight up skinny, but again, there are fewer straight up skinny once you're past 25 or so, so they do about the same.

Anyway. Be fit. If you naturally bulk up, great, if you're natural lean when fit, great. Anyone in their own genetic version of 'good shape' will probably do decently.

[vishna]

There are more skinny dudes than buff dudes, so, loads more skinny dudes get sex per year than buff dudes. Ya know. So, skinny guys be the best you possible but know most ladies are ok dating a thin guy.
I've dated all over the spectrum, it's really about the guy.

[candycanehearts]

lol I used to like pretty muscly buff guys but i met my manager who is literally the hottest dude on the planet so now I’m into like skinny muscly guys (he is😍😍)

But lol ur not fat but r like muscly instead u knkw so ur not what i woyld think of as skinny

[strawberrysouffle]

I am simply not attracted to skinny guys, any kind of skinny. A guy either has to be so muscular that it makes him very broadly built, or have a nice amount of fat (dad bods all the way, I love those!) and have a natural “wide“ built, for me to be sexually attracted to them. But if I look at who my friends date, that doesn't seem to be the norm. More dad bods for me!

[raibees]

Skinny guys get more girls. Buff guys are intimidating. I would even argue guys with more weight on them- fat wise- get more because... ya know... dad bod. That would make them even less intimidating. But what do I know.

[TonyHman]

Honestly well written and I do agree! I myself am skinny, but I know for a fact that my crush likes me back and we are planning to date in the near future! She is extremely beautiful and I never could have imagined getting her in the first place, but personality tops all! At least if you are looking for something real...

[Z-100]

I used to think buff guys get all the girls. But with guys like Justin Bieber and the One Direction guys and all these other skinny guys setting up the stage, I do think skinny guys have a chance. In the end, it all depends on your looks, facial looks or otherwise, if you're good looking, you'll get attention, that's for sure.

[mrsingle]

Skinny guys can have great stamina, love to exercise, eat healthy, and the fact they aren't fat means they are healthy. Buff guys might work out more, but take workouts away and special diets and they will loose that muscle quick.

FYI, you aren't skinny, average maybe. Skinny people don't have much muscle or weight.

[Truthatanycost]

I feel better with a bit of mass, so that's what I workout with in mind. Whether women find that more, or less attractive... not really a concern. When I'm training and channeling all of that fury, what women want or prefer, couldn't be further from my mind.

[JohnDoe3000]

Meh, it's a second order thing anyway. Having a handsome face is the most important thing, after that being tall (6' or higher in Western countries), only then comes being buff. Having said that, I do recommend guys go to the gym because unlike having a handsome face or being tall you don't have to be born buff: it's within your control.

[JustCallMeLeon]

Good take. A few pointers are entirely true. To be honest i think a nice (nice doesn't to be nice and may differ from girl to girl) body is a plus BEFORE you actually get paired up, in the pre dating phase. It has nothing to do with bed skills, attitude, passion etc.

[Anonymous]

"[girls] don't care for brains, only body"
did you just say men who focus on their bodies are basically braindead?
and that girls who have that fit preference are suddenly shallow/superficial?
why aren't girls who prefer skinny guys superficial? that's as much a preference as liking buff men.
you must be skinny and bitter.

[myTake Owner]

You took it way out of context

I said that one of the reasons girls like muscular guys is because they are superficial. It’s not the only reason, just one. It’s superficial because they only focus on the man’s body. A skinny body is not generally seen as manly to most women, hence why more girls drool over a muscular body than a skinny body. It’s possible to be superficial to only like skinny bodies, but it isn’t as common

[myTake Owner]

I’m not bitter, but you must be delusional if you think muscular men don’t get more girls 😊

[Opinion Owner]

and women who prefer skinny men is bc of their body; they are also superficial. it doesn't matter if there are "more" going for muscular, there are still women who go for skinny men and it's exactly the same thing.

And i never said muscular men get less girls lmao nice try though

[myTake Owner]

Ok. You’re right, so what is the problem?

[thothahuramazda]

Medium build. 6ft2. Tan. Well groomed. Smooth skin. Strong back. Has a good income to collect child support from. You can't work out because she is concerned about the other girls at the gym but you need to put her in her place and say hey gurl like ryan gosling your not the only one for me so if you still want all this shut cho mouth. If she has an opinion why do you care. you can pick up chicks like a dog in the forest picks up ticks.