Dating. It is a huge step in every guy's and girl's life, a lot of us remember our first love and first girlfriend or boyfriend. However, the biggest problem for some guys and girls is how to how to build a solid foundation with your crush and eventually ask them out without being rejected, especially if you get rejected a lot or you haven't been in the dating scene for a long time or at all for that matter.
The number one problem I see is guys (and girls) is being rejected either because the crush wants to 'stay friends' or doesn't see them romantically (The nice guy problem).
If you've been friendzoned or rejected by a crush you are currently pursuing, it's time to move on as that ship has sailed and once someone has put you in the friend zone, there is no real way out.
So why were you friendzoned in the first place?
- You're coming off as clingy or desperate:
Sometimes, as result of constant rejection, people tend to become clingy and can give off a desperate vibe to them. Realising that you have become desperate or clingy and help you in the long run.
Sure, love is a human need, but being patient will go a long way than trying to pursue every girl you like.
- You are 'too nice':
Nice guys can be great unfortunately being too nice means 90% of the time you are not taking risks to show your crushes you like her or him in a romantic way, hence they class you as a friend until you reveal your feelings, where they freak out and friendzone you.
Alright, I get the point how can I reduce rejection the next?
- Firstly, work on improving yourself, physically, romantically and intellectually. I recommend the YouTuber BasedZeus, his advice is good for people struggling with dating and offers some solid good tips! Slowly improving yourself will draw the attention of crush and make you more confident within yourself!
- Learn how to flirt and again BasedZeus covers that. Naturally, when you know how to flirt not only you become sexier than average Bill at school, but you become confident too which is also very sexy to a girl and a guy.
- Improve your style game, there is nothing better than a man or a girl who can pull of a great outfit. If you are a guy, first watch TMF on YouTube and second don't be afraid to go out there, chances are you'll be more successful in impressing your crush if you had clothes that complimented you rather than some lame t-shirt, don't be afraid to dress up. As for girls, I don't expertise in women fashion but like guys get clothing which complements your figure, chances are the next time you go to work, school or hang out with him he'll notice and maybe desire you a bit more ;)
- Have a good hairstyle, if you don't use hair product or haven't styled your hair for a while, do it and see the difference it makes, there is nothing worse than having a haircut or style which stuck in 2010 or doesn't look right on you!
- Guys! Hygiene, grooming and smells! Mostly with guys, hygiene seems to pass over our heads. Make sure you are groomed whether it's beards or toenails, girls notice. Make sure you're showered (you'll be surprised on how many guys think Lynx is a substitute for showering) and you wear some good cologne to complement your style!
Girls, make sure you again are showered and don't be afraid to use perfume, but with all good things, don't over use them otherwise you may end up overwhelming everyone around you and most importantly your crush!
Guys and girls, make sure you have good oral hygiene too, nothing is more of a turn off than yellow teeth and bad breath. Mints and chewing gum are cheap and available everywhere, ask a mate if need be!
- Rejection happens to everyone, even the most confident and popular guys and girls. If you take it negatively, you'll feel negative about it, take every rejection as a lesson what you should and shouldn't do next time around.
- Relationships are overrated:
The reality of relationships is that it can be very stressful, there is more to life than relationships and dating should not be your number one priority in life. It looks good on the outside and it can be fun, but ask yourself, do you feel ready to be a relationship or you only getting into one because of peer pressure or jealousy of your friends and needing to be validated?
- If you keep getting rejected, don't worry the right girl or guy will come, the world isn't ending tomorrow!
The moment you see girls and dating as second in life, you become more chilled about it, you come off less desperate and clingy.
I hope this helped, this is my first ever take and apologise if did come of ranty and if there was repetition in the article, I wish everyone luck in their dating life and hope they are successful. Feel free to reach out to me for any more help either by commenting below or DMing me as I would be happy to help! ^_^