How Do Failures in Online Dating Affect Male Self-Esteem?

DavidElmers
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While it is often the subject of jokes, male self-esteem is just as vulnerable to negativity as women. Low self-esteem is a big problem, and it is exacerbated by failures that happen on dating sites.

Factors and Situations on Dating Sites That Negatively Impact Male Self-Esteem

There are several different factors on dating sites that can negatively impact male self-esteem. Of course, the first thing that men might see is that nobody is interested in their profile. They aren’t seeing any visitors and they aren’t getting any messages in their inbox. Part of that problem stems from the fact that many guys have been raised to believe that women should flock to them. The reality is that the dating game needs to be played from both sides. You have to put yourself out there in order for people to get to know you, and then see where your relationships go. Another reason that men suffer doubts while on dating sites is if they get ghosted. Unfortunately, that is part of life in the modern day. There are so many people that rather than tell someone they aren’t interested; women and men just stop talking altogether. This can be painful for sure.

The Psychological Aspect of Failure on Male Self-Esteem

Men in many parts of the world are conditioned since birth to have a desire to succeed. If they aren’t successful at whatever they try, then they are unworthy failures in the eyes of their peers. That is a damaging mentality, but when they try and fail at romance, it can be devastating. Not only are they being told that they aren’t worthy by a mate, but they’re also failing at what could be the most important part of life.

Composing Male Self-Esteem

So, with so many pitfalls, how do you insulate your self-esteem against these issues? First and foremost, you have to realize that your self-worth is not tied to the perceptions that others have of you. That means you don’t have to worry if not everyone likes you. Another thing to realize is that modern dating is a lot different from what you may be used to. After all, the impersonal nature of online and ability to eschew anyone you want allows people to be needlessly flippant if not downright cruel. So, make sure you are looking at the right sites that have serious people looking for relationships. If there is a young crowd online, then you probably want something else. Fewer rejections and more conversations, even if they aren’t completely romance, will lead to better outcomes.

How to Rebuild After Failure

Now, even if you are on the best site, there is no guarantee that you won’t face any rejections. In fact, you are going to have to learn how to fail with grace. Instead of getting angry at someone rejecting your advances, simply move on. There are far too many people seeking a match to get upset over the failure of a single one. So, when you do face failure, how do you rebuild? The simple answer is to get right back out there and try again. You are only going to succeed after you put in the effort and find an amenable person. Also, you have to realize that it’s not always a problem with you that is causing the issue. Sometimes, you meet the wrong person at the wrong time. Pick yourself up, change your attitude to be positive, and get back in there.

It’s clear that building and maintaining self-esteem is an important part of dating for most men. It can be built through success and diminished through failure. However, by showing men that rejection is a natural part of the dating process, they can begin to recover from the hurt that they feel during poor dating outcomes. All in all, men need to remember that their self-worth isn’t completely contingent on the feelings that others bear towards them, only how they deal with the issues they face.

How Do Failures in Online Dating Affect Male Self-Esteem?
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