Why do guys always say "Its up to you"?

I can never make decisions for myself sometimes. Guys are like its up to you. Im like basically saying no its up to you. Because I dont know I'm not a good decision maker


Most Helpful Guy

  • It's because they don't want to make the 'wrong' decision.

    For example:

    Guy: where do you want to eat?
    Girl: i don't care, it's up to you.
    Guy: how about (insert place)?
    Girl: ewww, i hate that place
    Guy: ok, how about (insert some other place)?
    Girl: no that place is nasty
    Guy: ok, so what kind of food are you feeling like right now?
    Girl: i don't really care, you choose.
    Guy: ok, how about chinese?
    Girl: nah, i can't do chinese, or japanese
    Guy: cool. let's do mexican then. I'm in the mood for mexican.
    Girl: yuck. I had a burrito once and hated it.
    Guy: what about salads? do you like salads?
    Girl: why are you being so pissy? just pick something
    Guy: i'm gonna go jump off a bridge now.
    Girl: stop being so dramatic.


    Guy: where do you want to eat?
    Girl: i don't care, it's up to you.
    Guy: how about (insert place)? I haven't been there in a while
    Girl: Sure, sounds good.
    ---- you get your food -----
    Guy: oh god, this food's sooo fuggin delicious. I'm gonna die.
    Girl: (takes one bite and puts it down) I can't eat this. This is terrible.
    Guy: what's wrong? it's great
    Girl: i just don't like it.
    Guy: finish as much as you can and i'll eat the rest
    Girl: alright (she nibbles on it and makes weird faces)
    Guy: ok, i'll eat the rest
    ----- Girl and guy leave place -----
    Girl: i'm hungry
    Guy: no doubt you barely ate anything. where do you want to go?
    Girl: i don't know, you decide.
    --- Guy pulls out a gun and shoots himself -----


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What Guys Said 10

  • Because maybe the decision is yours to make, like it or not?

    When you leave the choice up to a guy, you'd better be happy with the result. I've known more than one girl who refused to make the decision herself, and complained about the result of what the guy picked.

    I've noticed a lot of girls who not only don't like making decisions, they don't even like having the decision made for them. It's a no-win situation.

    Girl: Which of these do you think I should get?
    Guy: I think they both look good. It's your call.
    Girl: But I don't know which one I should pick.
    Guy: Well, you're the one who's wearing it, so it's your call.
    Girl: But I don't know which one I should pick.
    Guy: Again, it's up to you. I personally like the blue one better.
    Girl: I like the blue too, but what if I want the red one later?
    Guy: So get the red one, then.
    Girl: But I like the blue.
    Guy: So get the blue one, then. I really don't care.
    Girl: But the blue one kinda makes me look fat.
    Guy: You're not fat. If you think so, get the red one then.
    Girl: But the red one doesn't go well with that skirt I like, and it makes my boobs look weird.
    Guy: If you don't like how they make you look, then don't get either one.
    Girl: But I can't do that. Why are you making this so difficult?

    If you're going to defer your choices to someone else, live with the decision they make. The ambivalence towards decision making is aggravating as hell to deal with. Girls who do this crap are insufferable.

    Also, the kind of girl who can't make a decision and stick with it are terrible to date. They're the commitment-phobes of the dating world; they're the girls who are never satisfied with a good guy, who will drop a real catch because they can't be happy with the choices they make (or making choices at all).

  • "up to you" means "i like both options, so you get to pick the one you want the most" :)

    Also it's used as a form of "i just wana hang with you, so it's not that important where it is as long as we're there together". Just don't drag him to victoria's secret (unless he gets to sneak peek a lot) or something, mkay?

    Think you get it? We generally use it when we want the girl to pick the option that appeals most to her (because we are happy about both options)

  • Because they care about what you think. You'd be complaining even more if he never let you make a decision.

  • I don't know for sure, but maybe the guys who are saying this are hoping that you'll be more self-confident and assertive in what you want. I know I like a girl with a strong, assertive personality.

  • Because let's say i wanna hang out with this girl, I let her set her time (using it's up to you), because if I set up the date on this tuesday, and she's not free.. I would sound pushy and needy. Do you get what I mean?

  • I would say this for two reasons:

    1. I don't want to argue with a woman for telling her what to do to often, so I offer her a few instances where she can be the decision maker.
    2. I want her to make a decision because she's taking too long.

  • Cuz we don't care, it's whatever

  • I probably do it just because I don't want the girl to disagree with my choice and not say anything. Also you have to throw in the "it doesn't matter what we do because I'm with you" lol.

  • Because we never want to force anything.

  • Beta males say so. Masculine males say I'd like if u (the decision they made) do this with me.

    • Your answer is 100% correct. Beta males don't take charge of situations enough when it comes to women. They leave it up to women to make decisions and then these same men sooner or later get replaced by a male (alpha) that does take charge of situations with women.

What Girls Said 4

  • yea i have this guy i like in my school and i asked him if it was ok if i sit with him and he says its up to you... so i sit with him for about a week then my best friend tells me that he told her to tell me that he does not actually want to sit with me so i just made a total fool out of my self!!! all because of that stupid saying its up to you!!!

  • Because even if they give their ideas, the girls might just want it their way. Or they simply respect ur decision whatever it is, as long as u r happy.

  • Because they're just as worried as you are on making the wrong decision :)

  • I hate guys who say that.
    I used to have a guy that said that all the time, and then when I'd actually decide on something, HE WAS NEVER FUCKING HAPPY. Like just pick if you're not going to be happy with my choice -_-