Why are people saying that nice guys are pathetic?

[Luthiaeel]

I have talked to many people saying that girls tell them that they are too nice or like that nice guys are boring and stuff, why? I don't get it, aren't nice guys the best guys?

[MrOracle]

Speaking as a former Nice Guy (tm), let me explain.

Most people think there are 2 types of ("normal") guys: Nice Guys and Bad Boys, but there are actually 3, with the third being the rare Good Guy. Most people don't understand that there's a difference between a Nice Guy and a Good Guy, but there is, and it's huge.

We know that girls are attracted to CONFIDENCE, and they're attracted to Bad Boys because they have lots of confidence, as well as some DANGER, which younger/immature girls also find attractive and exciting. But sooner or later, a Bad Boy is going to turn his bad behavior towards the girl.

Nice Guys don't want to be BAD, but they also lack confidence, so they try to compensate for their lack of confidence by being EXTRA nice. In other words, they become a spineless doormat, "letting" the girl make all the decisions, because he figures that if she gets to do everything SHE wants, she'll be happy. He doesn't understand that she doesn't WANT to make decisions, but rather she wants HIM to make the decisions - she just wants her needs and desires to be taken into consideration when he does so. Anyway, Nice Guys are spineless and DESPERATE, and usually pretty shy, and all of that is a huge turn-off to most girls.

Finally, we have the rare Good Guy. A Good Guy is "nice" in that he doesn't hurt people for selfish reasons and is polite and well-mannered, but he also has CONFIDENCE, and TAKES CHARGE, and he doesn't take crap from anyone, even people he likes or wants respect from. He isn't afraid to make decisions, and he isn't bothered by rejection or failure. Most girls want a Good Guy, but they are in very short supply, and tend to "trade at a premium", meaning a Good Guy with average looks often gets a Hot Girl, because his other attributes make up for his lack of looks.

Most girls, if they can't find a Good Guy, would rather have an exciting Bad Boy than a boring, tedious Nice Guy, and Nice Guys can't understand that.

[Virtuous]

This sadly.

[MrOracle]

Because they don't understand it, they get frustrated, and eventually angry and bitter at women, because they THINK they are being what women want (i. e., NICE), but they are still missing the main thing that women REALLY want, which is CONFIDENCE. And until they can open their mind and accept that they'll need to forget everything they THINK they know (or were incorrectly taught by a woman who didn't know how to explain herself properly, or even understand what she really wants herself) and learn the ACTUAL ways of the world, they will continue to fail with women, and thus continue to be depressed, bitter, desperate, and angry. And women will continue to be disappointed, and choose Bad Boys who hurt them instead of the Nice Guys who bore and frustrate them.

[SomeoneImportant]

You nailed it man. Also, you consistently write paragraphs in your answers I've noticed. You really break shit down my friend, get down to the nitty gritty. Bravo sir.

[Insaan]

Fuck! i salute you bro.
Listen asker! MH award here please!

[heavensgift2girls]

This is the best possible answer that could be given. People need to stop teaching boys to be nice guys, and teach them to be good men that aren't afraid to stand up for themselves.

[Insaan]

Many girls don't want nice guys. It's not about being nice or douchebag but it's about the personality associated with these nature.
Douches could be very interesting while nice gentlemen guys would be boring for you.
Not applicable to everyone but such traits are observed very keenly by me.
When you date a guy... you are only been attracted to his nice interesting lifestyle who can carry hours of conversations but you are not really differentiating if he is good or bad. You won't realise but we can.
Most friendzoned guys are the nice guys girls should have accepted.. But in practice, that isn't happening.
Hence nice guy finish last. Now there is once again different explanation why they finish last.

[Anonymous]

"Nice guy" is a euphemism for something other than a guy who is nice. Usually, a passive aggressive fellow who may not even like or respect the people he's trying to get with. Often, it's a guy who does favors for beautiful girls and then secretly feels that she owes him sex and romance:

Well rounded guys who pay some attention to their apperance and social skills and are kind to everyone do fine.

[circlebill]

All you accomplish with a post like this is to demonize ACTUAL nice guys who were raised to treat everyone with kindness and respect!

[Opinion Owner]

That's my point with the quotation marks. "Nice guy" as slang means something other than a guy who is nice.

[bubble_tea]

nobody can be too nice or boring (meaning they only do what you want to do, only say what you wanna hear).. any smart person knows they have a reason not yet known for appearing that way.

[mistninja314]

should nice guys be the best guys? SURE

but are they NO

explain that logic to me smh

no cdn3.cubiclebot.com/.../bueno-cat.jpg?363b75

[Roycaryn]

It's because "nice guys" are that way to supposedly please a woman rather than out of genuine empathy or compassion. It's one thing to do "pleasing" things. It's another to have a true sense of compassion out of which happiness and confidence naturally flow.

[wendigoRed]

Nice guys aren't genuinely nice they really try and use it to get women, but fail. A bad boy is a confident, domineering, mysterious guy who is insecure and women want to save him, but he doesn't actually love her. In the middle you have the good guy. He is confident and strong yet altruistic.

[Joee23]

Booom Right There ^^^^^^ Exactly Bro. *thumbs Up*

[JustinCaseUDontKnow]

Some girls don't appreciate nice guys, they rather have a guy who
treats them like crap they want the guys whose bad

[BertMacklinFBI]

because some people associate nice guys with door mats.

[Anonymous]

From what I have heard is that if they are too nice they are desparate and can be eaisly gotten. However, the ones who aren't are a challenge they aren't guarenteed to like you and are exiting. I dont understand why dating or liking someone who is an ass to you is desirable but thats what I've been told.

[Anonymous]

Nice guys are pathetic particularly because they are not nice. The motive is to get into your sopping wet pussy.

[DanielTheOG]

Nice use of the word sopping. 10/10

[Anonymous]

This is exactly why I used to be a nice guy but not any more. And now I get dates.

Heads up nice guys: girls don't actually want you.

[Blueeyes81]

There's nice with a backbone.
There's nice with no spine.
There's the asshole who's nice to try and get girls.

[SurströmmingLover]

Some girls like them and some don't. Everyone likes different types of people

[electrollama]

Because masculinity and gender policing.

[dwiller943]

Exactly. I never understood girls like that.

[silvernblackattk]

Because people are weird

[Luthiaeel]

I think you're right :)

[silvernblackattk]

I would rather have a girl whos nice to me

[Luthiaeel]

Yeah exactly