Is it possible to have too intense feelings for someone you're dating and screw it up due to that?

[Anonymous]

Yes

No

A total of 59 votes were cast: 33 girls and 26 guys. See detailed results

Updates

+1 y

How would a person avoid screwing it up if they were feeling "too much" for someone?

And another thing, won't you just end up disappointing if it happens to work out? We're all just people after all.

Updates

+1 y

Let's put it this way... what if it's the other person that's having too intense feelings for me and screwing everything up due to that and I'm really not there yet. What is there for me to do?

[rjroy3]

"How would a person avoid screwing it up if they were feeling "too much" for someone?"

Taking a step back and think about what the other person is feeling as well. You want to be true to yourself, but aware of how you're making them feeling as well. If they're feeling uncomfortable, then dial it back. That could mean just giving them more space and talking to them less as you focus on living your life. Or it could be being less intense with the conversation you do have with him. Like instead of talking about "where is this going?", talk about "how was your day?" and just focus on experiencing getting to know him, rather than trying to get somewhere.

[ThatOneGuy007]

I've found that people aren't nearly as invested and passionate about relationships as I am.

I bite my tongue, and let the girl set the pace.

[Asker]

For me it's not about investment or passion, it's just that I take time to warm up to people. I don't really get crushes that often and when I fall for people it happens slowly and takes time. But when I finally am in love with someone, it's not easy to fall out of it anymore. I invest in them more than can be said. And I am super passionate. Even if a break up happenes, I'll still love them for years and years to come.

Sometimes guys make a mistake thinking I'm heartless and couldn't care less, but the fact is I'm just never gonna fall for them as quickly as they seem to fall for me. What they need to understand is to give me time. I fall for the PERSON, not what I think they are or the way they look, but their personality and quirks, and if I'm not given enough time to get to know the real person how am I supposed to just go and fall for them, I don’t get it.

[Asker]

So if you fall for a girl and find yourself thinking "well she doesn't seem to care, if she'd love me she'd already be in love with me and show it", remember that not everyone is able to fall for people as fast as some people are. And I'm serious about this. 'Cause too often people jump off the train too fast and won't even give the relationship time to progress into anything real. This keeps happening to me, guys start off way too intense and give up quick. I freak out from too much attention right away and am unable to understand how they could possibly be in love with me so fast when they don’t even know the real me. Just give it time, if it's about to happen, it will. So you're absolutely right about letting the slower one set the pace!

[Punzie_]

I am the same way. I still am fighting being in love with one guy that has broken up with me 3 years ago. I never knew I loved him until it was too late and I finally understood. But by that time, he didn't "like" me anymore and now I am cursed with these feelings. Yet now, he is acting like he wants me back again. As a person in love, it's hurts so much but you just want to give in.

I voted yes because that is what I did. I was too passionate and loving that when we were together, I think it was just all too real for him (although we never even got very intimate and didn't talk all romantic much either.) I agree.

[cherry1101]

It's probably best to hold back a bit until the other party feels just as intense as you do ;)

[NyomiMcClinton]

Yes, because you are trying to hard to get them to like you and want you.

[Avneo]

Right, happened with me. But no one cares. Nothing we can do about it as we can't change some one, life fucks in many ways and we all are getting funked by it. Not everyone have same sorta feelings lol.
The most we can do is never try to hurt each other. B-)

[Avneo]

* and this is one of the way we all are getting fucked by it.

[DeStorm_108]

if someone felt this towards me , I would never leave them alone. But in my relationship I'm very honest and would rather ask what they are comfortable with because you never know what to much would be to them

[DeStorm_108]

maybe you should let him know what you are comfortable with, just don't go saying that you don't feel that intense about him and tho k he should tone it down. if you do that it will create dought and he will be hurt. Best to just say what you feel but put it in a way that won't hurt him and hinder any chances of progression within your relationship. Think wisely of what you say , it can make and break people. Hope this helps

[DeStorm_108]

tho k =think*

[es20490446e]

Yes. But it's mostly because of insecurity, not feelings.

[es20490446e]

It's like driving a car: you would want to keep your eyes on where you want to go, not the pedestrian. Otherwise you tend to drive into them.

[genericname85]

if you´re too pushy, you might scare them away xD but i think it doesn´t change anything. if they´re not gonna like you, it doesn´t matter how much you liked them to begin with xD

[ibodi]

Yes maybe, It is like gilrs dont believe boy's love can start from sex.

[Browneye57]

It's call over exuberance. Some people are like this. Sometimes it's good, sometimes it's too much. Gonna be different for everybody.

[Kurodo]

You screw up by being weird and creepy and giving too much all at once

[starbucksjr69]

I don't know. I tell my girlfriend that I love her so much that my heart would hurt. We're doing fine since I'm not going overboard.

[Lumberman53]

It is because it can lead to too strong of an attachment which most people guys and girls alike consider a turn off to them

[Anonymous]

I don't have feelings nor do I date. I pay. So "no" I never experience those nasty screw ups.

[Avneo]

Even I feel like my feelings are killed.

[serious]

Yes, it's possible to screw up because of that.

[Dumbbong]

Be calm, tell yourself he is not running away.

[LastNightmare]

lol, sometimes

[Anonymous]

no..