Most Helpful Guys
That's a good question. My father is divorced from both my mother and stepmother, so I fall under this myself.
I think it affects me in several ways:
-I recover quickly from breakups
-I don't expect the relationship to be for life (doesn't mean I don't take it seriously, though)
-I'm very exogamous (will happily date someone from a very different background)
I don't have a problem with commitment or trust issues, though, and I do fall in love.
both my parents were bad examples but I believe it does depend on the examples of what those parents valued most and what those values were that were influential to their kids growing up
I for one saw my parents divorce as a good thing, they were both abusive and toxic before, during and after the split...
but whenever I was in any relationship or dating I put my all into each one...
so it may have meant my parents crap may have influenced my decisions to try harder or maybe it might have been I chose to do that despite their crappy ideals
Most Helpful Girls
yes and no. On one hand, children of divorce are equally likely to be co-dependent as say those who grow up in unhealthy households where maybe the two people shouldn't have stayed married. I think children of divorce are a little more independent (depending on the age of the divorce), and that's simply the logistic part of always being with "one parent" at a time. There's bound to be more time that the one parent has to do sometime else on "their" time than if there is a chance there is someone else around. In these moments, the kid just has to learn to occupy themselves until the parent can give full attention again.
What kids do with that "independence of full attention" is entirely up to the kid and the parenting and what type of options the environment presents them with. I think it's more religion or culture that keeps people from separating physically, rather than mentally or emotionally. Just in some religions or cultures, it is okay to have family outside of a narrow (likely heteronormative) definition.
It depends on the values the parents have taught the kid and how was the divorce. Also if the parents get new partners, the environment is different if those new partners are short or long lasting relationships. Besides the age the kid has when the parents get divorced would affect too.
In the end, are many variables. In real life I know many kids whose parents are divorced and are usually very pessimist about love. However, I know some who can commit and beign their parents divorced doesn't affect them at all.
To conclude I want to point that even some people whose parents are happily married don't believe in lasting relationships, and I feel it's more because of some new problems young generations has to face that oldest ones didn't had to.