I think it's assumed unless the woman volunteers to pay. But appearantly most guys 25 and younger dropped having their pride and dropped paying the check. Beats me...#wowgirl10q#gag#
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If I wanted to pay for a man I would just get a male prostitute. Least then he would be pretty, quiet, and understand he had to do whatever I say becaues he understands his role in the situation. He's the B+#@h and it's my show after all I'm paying.
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Thank you @Partywithtom @xTom98 @iskg679 @Logorithim @bhavy24 @Matt57 @MrBurke @hindril and who ever I may have left out. THANK YOU for standing up when you go pee. Your all good men with pride.đđđI appreciate you guys
I didn't know your mom has HIV and is a night walkerđ¤ˇââď¸. tfoh bum get a job and a bigger dick. then you wouldn't be so stressed over my opinion. Only the broke guys with small dicks like u are offended. kick rocks
@Pink2000 I'm sorry you deserved MHO but secretgarden said small dick. I feel that is the most basic correct answer in two words to this question possible
I fully agree with that. However women wanted equality. Those that prefer patriarchy which I and the Bible advocate and do nothing about the current climate we find ourselves in are nothing more than silent partners in my mind as they benefit from the rebellion women are actively engaged in. So unless theyâre doing something to fight against it, in my mind theyâre accomplices.
Agree or disagree?
Therefor if women want equality they should be given full equality and they should pay for their half of dates rather than expecting men to pay as if weâre still in a patriarchal system.
Or we can return to that and Iâd say men should pay in they type of system.
Ok then. Iâm glad to hear, and after taking time to observe your behavior if I were dating you Iâd then pay for all dates and revert back to being chivalrous so long as you acted like a lady. For the rest of these women I wonât pay a cent as typically they say theyâre feminists. Anyone who says their a feminist can pay her own way and wonât date me once that comes out because Iâll end it. Thatâs for sure.
I believe we uncovered the root reason. These guys that âallowingâ women to pay on a date that requested for are guys that are boys. Boys that were brought up in 1997 on with by the strong single female.
The reality is this: In 1997, there were a total of 1,163,000 divorces granted in the United States. That's 4.3 per one thousand of the population. There are currently 19,400,000 divorced adults (1998). The median age at divorce is 35.6 for Males and 33.2 for females. The median duration of a marriage is 7.2 years.
These guys lack a male role model to show them what has been traditionally been passed down in generationsâŚhow to be a gentleman and have chivalry. Itâs soo apparent throughout this post. That is the root, the males up to 25 years are primary parent was a self-made feminist who wore the role of a mother and father, which created these âsoftboysâ
Guys changed? Women changed and guys are changing in response. If you want equal pay and to be able to work you should pay your own way and stop expecting guys to pay.
I hate some of the women these days. They expect to be tre6like women in the past, yet they don't act like women use to.
@BeesNectar: No, my mother didn't have any brothers and she was 30 when I was born, plus grandfather died when I was 4. I learned about girls from guys I played sports with who were a couple of years older than me as well as my own experiences. Back then, it would have been embarassing to expect a girl to pay on a date, although as a teenager I didn't go on formal dates like adults do, so this was mostly paying for a movie and pizza , stuff like that.
your saying you are product of the social climate acceptance. I applaud you for having the insight and self awareness to gather and seek the answer. Very forward thinking
Ok but why are you broke little boys offended over what @log has to say? the point is you little boys need to grow tf up, get a job, an education, and stop being pussys period. if you can't afford to take a lady out then dont bother her. period!
Nubian, girls should get jobs, and education and stop being pussys too. Any girl that doesn't value a guys time and money isn't worth it. I'd much rather spend it on myself and my friends. If you consider the risk reward benefit you would see that paying for dates isn't worth it. Even if you get married you still are lucky to get a divorce and loose everything. If a girl isn't going to put the time and money into I see no reason why the guy should. A long time ago women couldn't work and make money, so the guy payed. Now women are allowed to, so you can't honestly expect guys to continue doing the same tradition things if you as women no longer do the same things. You wanted equal rights, the extends into dating too. The way I see it is it is all or nothing.
@nathan again your are retarded, uneducated, and inexperienced. Her post had nothing to do with that. if you can't understand her question please pick up a self help book or talk to your mom. I dont get how you can be so stupid to not understand what she's saying.
First off, I was commenting on your comment, not the question. Secondly, stating that the risk isn't worth the reward, and that women are to blame, because they changed is answering the question of why men don't pay for dates anymore. The fact that you resort to so many personal attacks, such as calling me stupid points more to your lack of intelligence than mine. Additionally, I did answer the question even though my reply wasn't direct at the question. I also find it funny that you call me stupid, yet it took you three tries to spell "you are.".đ
There has been a generational shift away from a legacy where women didn't work to one where women are at greater parity with men than any point in history. My generation (Gen-X) holds that legacy of women not working. I and my peers were largely brought up to be 'chivalrous', but that concept was borne out of one where women did not work and if they did their income was not anywhere near the man's. In that situation it was right for men to pay, but we call it manners or chivalry. It's tough to shake off; I always pay for my dates regardless of whether she offers to pay or not. Don't get me wrong, I don't have an issue paying, not one time but my upbringing is responsible for this behaviour.
The generations after mine, the millenials (Gen-Y) and post-millenials (Gen-Z) do not carry this legacy. In these generations there was much more an emphasis on equality, empowerment, and the 3rd wave of feminism. The average age of women having birth is skewed later in life, women have a greater focus on career and career development, and gender pay gaps are narrowing. All of this is a good thing and points to greater equality, but you can't expect that equality to come without a change in men's attitudes. Why would a 25 to 30 year old guy pay for a date when the woman sitting across from him earns as much or more than he does? Add in the inculcated themes of his upbringing; equality and empowerment, and what you get is a very different scenario than a generation before.
When you say "most guys 25 and younger dropped having their pride" it isn't that at all. The men in that age bracket see you as equals and don't have previous generations' baggage. What you are expressing is a bit of 'having your cake and eating it too' in that you can't expect those men to pay when you are their peer. There are always exceptions, but I believe you'll find what I've expressed to be the prevailing viewpoint of the millenials and post millenials. Men of my generation (Gen-X) are more apt to pay and we are generally more established, so if you want a higher probability of the man paying date one of us.
Why should they? Girls work, they earn money so are able to be independent, this is not like in the past when most women didn't work. Some girls even earn more than some guys, so feels unfair he beign the one paying. I don't understand that "guys shall pay" social dating rule. Why some girls do behave like you are an object you buy with free meals? Guys are humans, not wallets to get free stuff.
I feel paying because it's a rule it's awful, while paying when you really liked the other person and had a good time is worth it. I wouldn't like to be forced to pay for an awful date with a person I don't want to see ever again. So I don't think guys should pay for every girl they date, just when they really feel like it.
I guess more guys in their 20's just want to meet the other person and hope the same for the other person, not to get free stuff but to really want to know him, specially because some people in their early 20's might keep studying or not working, or have started to work and their incomes are low, so expecting someone with not many money to always pay for his dates feels mean to me.
I'm going to get lots of downvotes but I might as well be honest. In a western culture/society many young boys are now being lectured they are sexist if they refused a woman who offered to pay/split the bill (yes I have seen it with my own eyes at this yum cha restaurant, where a Caucasian woman had gone off at her date (an islander guy) when he insisted that he should pay since it was their first date). They are being educated that women are independent in modern society and the old ways "patriarchal society" are dying. Women no longer need men anymore since they are more financially secured nowaday. So when you go on a date, we expect you to split the bill or pay for us because we don't want to make ourselves look bad by being called out on social media as a 'sexist'. This is just my two cents based on what is happening here in NZ. Obviously, not every NZ girls are like this, but more and more of them are popping out here and there, where they expected us to say yes if they asked for a split bill.
If I had to guess its because women stated that we are equal, so some men got it in their head that women where telling the truth (even though everything in their life should have shown that this is far from the case). Others probably are too fed up with having to pay for women who give nothing in return and do nothing but explain to men how they are "strong independent women who don't need a man to take care of them" then imediatley demand that the man take care of her (but refuse to acknowledge what he is doing or give anything in return). So that could be it. Or it could be because men have been forced out of pretty much everything in society that they can no longer afford to pay for women because women have actively pushed them out of higher education thus cannot get better jobs, forced them out of jobs (as women are more likely to be hired, less likely to laid off etc.) so they can't afford to pamper women any more, i. e. they expect women to actually own up to their statements and be an equal with equal responsibility instead of having all the privilege and none of the responsibility. Though honestly I cannot say why these are just based upon what I hear and what stats say.
Why should they have to? Most women these day have their own source of income and have no problem spending it on things they don't need. How hard is it to pay for your own meal when going out? I for one refuse to have my meals paid for to the point where my grandfather and I will argue about who's paying. Perhaps it's because I don't like feeling indebted to someone maybe? But mainly it's just I don't like people paying for stuff that I'M the one using (or eating) and as for my grandfather he raised me therefore as soon as I started working I felt the urge to return his kindness.
@wowgirlq you're welcome I can't believe how low these girls standards are. this is what happens when girls grow up without a decent male figure in their life. The girls on here need serious guidance. im glad you're wise enough to not settle for bullshit despite what these ignorant/inexperienced people are saying
Yes and most of the girls with these low standards are Barley in their 20's so they're naive and inexperienced. Then wonder why they get used and abused. its because they lack standards.
@nubianqueen704 and only Broke guys use the term gold digger have you noticed that? Never heard a man with money use that. These people forget they are dumb lol
I've noticed that the guys with nothing to offer say that. steve Harvey's book says ,"theres no such thing as golddigger." If a guy uses that term then that means he doesn't have his shit together
You two are literally the biggest trolls I think I have come across. It's the women who expect to have every little thing handed to them on a silver spoon that need the standards. Don't come at me as if being able to look after myself is something to be looked down upon.
Because they think any girl that traditionally believes in that has to either be a gold digger, or stay at home if he dates or marry her. That's how ignorant it is. I always tell guys, that paying SHOWS your investing in her. A woman just has to be receptive of you and your affections. Its not that hard nor complicated.
But you need to show you are invested too. If you expect us to do all the work then no wonder no one sees you as "strong independent women". You have to show us that we matter and not some free ride.
WHY? WHY THE FUCK should a guy want that or agree to that arrangement, you bloated egomaniac? Don't you realize that, if guys considered that WORTH DOING, they'd DO IT? Why is your time or company worth more than theirs? Why do YOU simply DESERVE stuff? Why does HE have to earn YOU? Why does only HE have to invest? And what does this even mean? WHO decides that women JUST have to be receptive? I know that's how YOU would fucking like it, but I guess those guys do NOT think that the world revolves around you!
It is not "hard" or "complicated", it's a shitty fucking deal that puts YOU far above HIM. WHY would a guy want that, especially if there's NO reciprocity whatsoever?
A lot of you so-called men are bitter, angry, resentful, selfish, egotistical, prideful, tactless, have no class. How dare any of you boy suggest any of the kind of things you do do you not even read half a comments you're posting on my comment feed. Why should you have to pay? Because of women like me? Nobody's going to consider me an independent woman? I don't know who in the world do you think you talkin to but I ain't one of those feminist women and neither am I one of these modern day women. I am a woman that is a price and I Believe In traditional Godly values. I don't care for that garbage. I don't consider myself an independent woman. I do Independence when it's needed because in my life I have no choice.
You don't want to pay because it's zactly what I had said because you are selfish with me while you were asking women you're not married to let alone friends with to date them. They don't owe you a date the same way you don't have to pay for them. So all of you that are complaining of being babies. Stop taking in believing every woman is the same because you guys had bitter experiences with such women who probably used you. Relationship is not all about you it's about the other person and if you are not looking to invest in a person how are they supposed to invest themselves and you? Think about that for all of you who wants to behave so stupid.
I'm talking about with a first date since it was always you meant this always approaching a woman and asking her out, so therefore it should be your responsibility to treat her since you want to ask her out. If you don't want to ask her out and you don't want to pay for anything's don't ask a woman. Weight for a woman to ask you out that way she can pay since you want to be so selfish. If you and the girl had agreed prior beforehand that you both like to play together there is no problem with that, and I have no issues. But all yourgoing to do is be selfish, and thinking with prejudice towards women saying oh I don't want her using me for my money kind of garbage then you should not be dating women. Date another man then, like you're gay. The only reason your man want to be involved with a woman is for sex and that's it. That's why a lot of women are using you and if I find another man who wants to do right by them and I don't even agree with it.
But I can see why a lot of them are having hatred for the opposite sex and behaving the way they do. I can't judge all them but neither am I going to be picking sides. You did call yourself to be a man but you act like cowards. Men in the past have more decency and respect in a lot of humans calling yourself to be men of 21st century even do to this day. My great-grandfather did everything in the house and he did everything for my grandmother and the family. He went to work, he did grocery shopping, he did the chores, he cooked, he played with my great-aunt's and uncles, can you help raise the children, took care of you when you were sick, drove you to school, paid for things we need to be paid for, build the house that is still standing to this day with his own Carpenter hands, and everything else both a man and a woman should do while still in my great-grandmother and they had raised healthy well-rounded adults.
No, it isn't all about me. It is about us. If I want to take a woman on a date and pay for it, I am not thinking that she is a gold digger. I am not investing in her. I am being what used to be considered a gentleman, and offering to pay. I do agree that you said a woman has to be receptive of the guys feelings. A girl who believes in this is not a gold digger or stay at home. This is how it used to be because the guy would be the one offering to take her out. Now, it seems either one will ask the other out. If a woman asks a guy out, does she pay?
Many view does claiming yourself to be men don't even come close to what my great-grandfather could have done and he lives have been in his late 80s. Many men in the past would be ashamed for what many of you men do today. You are so proud of yourself you don't see the stuff that comes even out your backside. We're not you supposed to be living this way. But it said I meant if you choose to forsake the teachings of old for things that don't even matter in today's world.
Yes she does because she is the one that asked him out. No it's technically not so much about you because you are not married to that person yet. If you're just focusing so much and not getting married because you just want to be common in law Couples, that's why a lot of things are messed up the way it is.
These days women have no choice they have to have something for themselves because they can no longer rely on a man to do it due to that feminism nonsense. I can understand that a decent man don't want to be dealing with that because neither would I want to continue to deal with that. But it is no excuse to treat any woman who believe in Traditional Values even if it's not as traditional as it was in the past anymore that way. This is why in this country men are getting crapped on if not just in the UK. People needs to get their act together but if they want to continue to do what they want then suffer the consequences that's all I'd say.
If my great-grandmother was living today and she knew that she had sounds like a lot of these guys on here are saying she would have whooped all their asses. With a belt too. And my great grandpa Lewis will took a shotgun to their butt, and tell him to never come back. My family didn't play that back then.
That's what a lot of them need today. And if the girls was not being respectful to men they would have told them do not expect them to get married to you, or stay with you with that mentality. A lot of people haven't been taught better or rebelled so that teaching their own children to rebell. And people want to know why they're so angry all the time.
@SirRexington Do it GOD'S WAY. That is what I'm advocating for. It ain't God's way? It's no way. I can care less what you people do down here. I care about how GOD made it to be. That's why the world is so screwed up. The rules were simple. Your able to have sex? You good. You can't. Your good. You won't by choice? For the sake of the Kingdom? Higher calling? EVEN BETTER.
Those who wants it? GET. MARRIED. Have a blast at sex all you want AFTER MARRIAGE. Just treat each other right. Make sure it makes everybody happy and not yourselves. Do your duties, and what you both agreed with. When the kids comes, RAISE THE KIDS, help each other. And do not speak bad things about each behind each others back, etc. Not that hard. Can't do it? Stay unmaried and single. I am tired of seeing both men and women constantly broken and hurt but they asked for it and do what they want, but complain about what they want so badly. Stop making life more complicated than it already is!
It's really not that hard! Do right by each other. People have their reasons, cultural and spiritual needs that needs to be met. That is why I never bothered because of this crap. All I ever wanted growing up before I realized I had poor reasons for being interested in dating, is for SOMEBODY to just treat me RIGHT. And want to marry, and honor my God if he doesn't want to serve God yet, and just allow me to be subserviant to him and honor my husband. Somebody I can not only love by take care of. Who wouldn't abandan me or hurt me, and somebody who I wouldn't do the same. But no! I gotta have sex before marriage? Dishonor not only my body, his body, his family name, my family name, my honor and intregy, and most important my Lord who sacrificed himself on the cross for me so that I wouldn't go to hell all because of self pleasure? This is why God said 'my people PERISH for their lack of knowledge!' Sex is suppsoed to worship and please the Lord, not ourselves. We're suppose to join
together and be help meets to each other. Riase well rounded adults so that they can live established and a fruitful life full of abundance and happiness. It may sound a distant fairytale to you people. But that is because you lack that mindset and the ability to turn those dreams and passions into reality with a plan. A logical plan at that. Women needs men to be leaders. She doesn't expect much. Only worldly women with no common sense or haven't been taught better or foreskan what she was taught is like that. But a woman with statue and higher standards for herself would expect no less than what she deserves. And its sad you men don't commit to higher standards. As long as it's not unralistic, why settle for less? Go for what you want! But make sure what your doing is not going to effect yourself and other's future.
I would like to understand what you are saying. I got from your original post that men think women are gold diggers or want to stay at home. Yet you talked that men should be like your great-grandfather and do everything? You originally posted that a guy paying is investing in her, does that mean he should keep going? Some things in all your posts are back and forth.
wanted. But no. Can't have it because don't know who's the real deal and who is just another scam not looking to use ME. I can easily make 6 figures, have my own place, etc. But what good does that do for me, if it's not for me, since I cannot do that for a husband and a family? I might as well do it for the homelsss, for cherity, for homeless pets or orphan children and give the spiritual needs as well. Not for a selfish person of the world who doesn't know how to give without expecting something else in return for poor reasons, but always say 'gimme, gimme, gimme.' Especialy when they can't get off their ass to do soemthing when I kindly ask for it. Sad I do things without complaint, but somebody else always has to complain about what work needs to be done. That is not a man nor a woman. But a child who wasn't ready to stop clinging to mommy or daddy, just having their own place.
@hindril Yes. He should keep going. He needs the chase her. As she equally needs to chase after him! I am in no way saying every man needs to be like my great grandfather. He is who, he is. But a man needs to be all he can and should expect to be BETTER. The woman needs to challange him to make him grow and mature and do more things. To make him a better person, the same way he should challange her to be all she can be and vice versa. A woman is triggered to do right when she meets a man who humbles himself.
The problem is many men already have this idea that women are gold diggers if she doesn't split the bill or is just looking for a free meal, because they were taught that from other bitter men. When I pay for somebody. I FREELY GIVE. I don't expect anything else in return. I don't do that to other people AND I don't EXPECT them to pay me BACK. I WANT to do it. It is my DESIRE to do it. That is love. Sounds like many of them have none. And actions speak louder than words. I hope men understand this about women. We don't just see, we are built to anaylize.
Everybody should be pushed to be their best selves. That's what dating and marriage is about. Especially marriage. It's learning how to love and live with a person who is different than you but you love each other enough to come together and create a NEW family [children].
To me, that has nothing to do with pride or any socially anchored practice.
Women want and must be equal to men and equality is also an issue when it comes to paying the bill and not only when it comes to demonstrating for equal rights.
But here again, you must leave room for exceptions such as if the girl is a student and the guy a worker, or if she is unemployed and her date not or if he invites her in a place that way too expensive for her income. In the last case, she could settle a fair amount, just to indicate that she is willing to contribute whatever amount she can afford.
If both are working and each one has a steady income, then there is no reason why each one should not settle their share.
Because I expect a woman to impress me just as much as she expects me to impress her. I have no issue with paying for someone, I have an issue with women who feel so entitled to get the longer end of the stick that they have the audacity to make their issues about *my* pride.
The moment a woman suggests that she believes her role in a relationship is to "receive my affection" and that my role is to provide her with it lest she brands me as defective, is the moment I dismiss that woman as having nothing of value to provide me with.
I don't mind paying for dates. But I don't thing gender should be a factor. If it's a new relationship it should be the person who asks the other out. If it's a committed to it should be the one who has more money to spend. Of course it shouldn't be a responsibility, and the other person should always be free to pitch in or cover the cost of they like.
How fucking dare you. Do you think because youâre a girl men HAVE to pay for you? Whereâs the #equality?
Let me ask YOU a question. Why arenât girls relationship material anymore? Why do most of them fuck like 4 different guys rather than date? Why are so many girls cheaters?
Yeah Iâm triggered because Iâm sick of girls like you thinking theyâre all entitled yet they still want âequalityâ. I actually paid for a girl once and two days later she told me she just wanted to be friends because she âwasnât a relationship type of girlâ. My friends joked about that for months... I will NEVER, EVER pay for a girl on this first date and you know what? I donât care. Itâs not menâs fault. Itâs girls whoâd rather act like whores than be good dating material and why should guys pay the price for that? Iâm not MGTOW or anything like that but seriously girls would rather get choked and degraded during sexy than to be treated well by a man and thatâs the truth.
It's no longer in the dating "script" as it doesn't really make sense anymore. It made sense when women typically didn't have any income but that's a long time ago.
However, for anyone who has some common sense, they should realize there's some obvious exceptions. * The one who has an income needs to pay for the one who hasn't. * If you suggest going somewhere which is really above the budget of your date well, you have to pay the whole check.
So, if a man who's employed asks out a woman who's studying, he still needs to pay up, or he shouldn't have brought her to a restaurant in the first place.
It's not 1960 anymore, the economy doesn't support families afforded by one person. With that, the culture has changed. Rightfully so. The gender pay gap is gone. women are expected to get a job in most countries now.
I used to pay for girls but a lot of them as I got older felt it was their responsibility to pay for some stuff.
If the girl wants the guy to pay, I don't think that necessarily means she's a bad person. If a guy pays for a girl I don't think that necessarily makes him a sucker.
i don't think is about pride, i think it has to do with the current climate, you know: "equiality this", "equality that" that women are equal to men and such, so why would a guy refuse to pay the dinner? i can think of 2 scenarios: 1: they actually believe this and they believe women are perfectly capable to pay their own food. But this is most probably the case when asking to split the bill. 2: the guys who do this could be cynical or resentfull and does this to put women's wallets where their mouths are, because "you can't demand equality only for what benefits you and chivalry when equality is inconvenient". i could be wrong of course, but that's what i think it happens.
I believe we discovered the root reason. These guys that âallowingâ women to pay on a date that requested for are guys that are boys. Boys that were brought up in 1997 on with by the strong single female.
The reality is this: In 1997, there were a total of 1,163,000 divorces granted in the United States. That's 4.3 per one thousand of the population. There are currently 19,400,000 divorced adults (1998). The median age at divorce is 35.6 for Males and 33.2 for females. The median duration of a marriage is 7.2 years.
These guys lack a male role model to show them what has been traditionally been passed down in generationsâŚhow to be a gentleman and have chivalry. Itâs soo apparent throughout this post. That is the root, the males up to 25 years are primary parent was a self-made feminist who wore the role of a mother and father, which created these âsoftboysâ
Times have changed, society has changed. I'm allowed to have my own money and job now, I don't see a reason for someone else to pay for me when I'm perfectly capable of doing so. But, I do think whoever asks the other person out should be prepared to pay entirely.
How many times have you heard how girls arenât even into a dude, they just went out with him for a âfree meal?â Then they out smashing like 10 different dudes on the reg.
These girls arenât worth it. Show men that youâre respectable women of value that know how to treat and appeal to a man and we wonât have a problem pitching in on a few dinner dates. Itâs very simple!
Because hereâs the truth, men shouldnât be whoring around either, so they fact that women feel they need to for âequality and empowermentâ purposes is complete and total trash. People have NO MORAL COMPASS. All impulse, no brains.
The third wave feminist movement encouraging women to be more independent radiates this idea that women no longer want men to take care of them, protect them or provide for them because the mere act oppresses them into being dependent on the men's care or something. Younger guys being more open to learn what women think of men and using the internet more often than older age groups, they most likely assume all women want to be independent with taking care of themselves and the idea puts young men off from providing for women
If I am working, and earning an income, I can pay for my own stuff. Any time I went on a date, I came prepared to pay for myself.
That said, the person who does the asking should at least offer. That gives the other person an opportunity to accept (and say "I'll get the next one", or something, thereby securing him/herself a second date) or decline.
Why go on a date if you can't pay your own way if necessary? No one owes anyone a hand out. However I'm a firm believer that the asker should pay. If I ask someone out I'm not going to expect them to pay a dime.
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