Should you ever compliment a woman on her looks on a First Date?

[coachTanthony]

Should you ever compliment a woman on her looks on a First Date?

YES (leave comment)

NO (leave comment)

Other

[OlderAndWiser]

At the end of a first date, if I want to see a lady again, I say something like, "you seen to be s very nice lady, no obvious signs of being a lunatic, and you are an attractive lady, so I hope that I will get to see you again soon.". Of course, I don't say any of that unless I actually mean it. And the lunatic comment is just to inject some humor and keep things light.

[coachTanthony]

Do you say " wow you look gorgeous" or "you are much prettier than your photos" or anything like that in the beginning? Or No.

[OlderAndWiser]

I think "wow, you look gorgeous" is too much, too soon. "You look better than your photos" sounds like I had a negative expectation. I just look at her and give her a big smile!

[coachTanthony]

Ok fair enough!

[OlderAndWiser]

What I like most about a lady is when it is obvious that she spent time getting ready, trying to look her best. That says great things about her attitude. She wants to please me and she cares about her appearance: those are desirable qualities!

[coachTanthony]

No doubt. I am talking about a first date though. I think many guys are afraid to give the slightest compliment to a woman on her looks and when the date is over she has no idea if the guy is even interested or not. At least this is what I hear from women when they complain about the guys.

[OlderAndWiser]

A woman wants to know that a guy is genuinely attracted and not just dating her because she is the only woman available. They want to know that their efforts to make themselves look attractive are noticed and appreciated. They want to know that you feel some spark for them. I get it.

[coachTanthony]

Exactly. Don't be a crude flirtatious idiot but show some interest. Women aren't mind readers!

[OlderAndWiser]

Some guys think that remaining aloof makes them look cool. I've never met a lady who was impressed with that attitude.

[coachTanthony]

Yeah that or scared shitless! LOL

[OlderAndWiser]

😁😁😁

[spartan55]

@OlderAndWiser
That lunatic bit have a good success rate?

[OlderAndWiser]

@spartan55 Yes, the women I meet are usually women I met online and when we meet, we usually talk about crazy first dates we have had. If I say that comment, I say it with the right tone of voice and it is quite obvious that I am saying it as a joke. Women usually laugh.

[spartan55]

@Timing and delivery are paramount I imagine.

[OlderAndWiser]

@spartan55 Indeed! I use humor constantly in conversation so, by the end of the date, it is usually very obvious that I am making a joke.

[OlderAndWiser]

Thanks for MHO!

[spartan55]

If I do it would something pretty neutral, like "you look great/nice".
Not "Man, that is a sweet ass!"

[clrastn]

Sure but dont go into it to deep like "youre so sexy." just say something like you look beautiful or gorgeous and she will be happy

[StingRayxoxo]

When you first see her, yes. But after that focus on showing interest in the other things about her.

[coachTanthony]

Yeah I agree!

[StingRayxoxo]

😊😊

[StingRayxoxo]

Thank you for MHO

[Cynicaldreamer]

Yes, of course! It doesn't even have to be anything extravagant or flirty.
Something simple like, "You look gorgeous..." or, "I like your outfit, hair..." will suffice.

It shows you notice her and appreciate her being with you. Heck I compliment a guy if he looks good, why not? It's just common courtesy

[Logorithim]

No, compliment her on other things, like great conversation.

[clrastn]

How do u know what woman like lol

[Logorithim]

@clrastn complimenting llher on her looks tells her that looks are paramount to you, which diesnt make a positive impression. If there's nothing else to compliment her on, then you don't.

[clrastn]

Nah, women like compliments, but getting too sexual for example makes it seem like, u only want her because of her looks. You can give her a small compliment like "u look beautiful" , thats fine

[clrastn]

Also u are 47 and on an app like this, u dont really need to try to give advice cuz it doesn't seem like u r lucky with women irl lmao

[StingRayxoxo]

@Logorithim I mostly agree with you! Other things are so much more important like engaging and connecting with her. I think a compliment when you first see her is very sweet but then move away from focusing on it.

[coachTanthony]

@clrastn I think your comment is a good one... now the other comment about him being 47 and not lucky with women and all that nonsense is really... not a good look! Not sure why you made it.

[ImHere4You]

@clrastn him being 47 and here plays no part in his luck with women. Maybe he’s just here to give advice when he has free time. Some people like helping others when they don’t have anything else to do. Think before you post.

[Logorithim]

@clrastn my experience has been with university students or graduates who expect more intellectual conversation when they are on dates. You may or may not have had a different set of experiences on your dates, but mine have universally appreciated the respect I gave their intellects and life experience. For that reason, I advise other guys to find other things to compliment. It also sets guys apart from the pack.

[Logorithim]

One other thing- if you're on a date with her it's implied tgat each of you is satisfied with the other person's looks. Some people are also cocky about their looks and I see no reason to pay obeisance to that cockiness.

[spartan55]

@clrastn
You could honestly learn quite a bit from gentlemen around our age. Unless, of course, you know everything already.

[MrOracle]

It's fine to say "wow, you look really nice" or something similarly harmless. Don't be overly sexual ("hey, baby, nice tits" isn't likely to be well received on a first date), and once have told her that she looks nice, focus on other things.

She will appreciate more specific (and more sexual) compliments after she knows you better, but unless she is writhing around and specifically drawing your attention to her body, save that stuff for later.

[jen_phils]

It's always awkward for me. I'm of the mindset that if you didn't find me physically attractive we wouldn't be on the date in the first place. A nice complement at first is always welcome, but if you're complementing me late in the date I assume you're wanting something.

[ImHere4You]

There’s absolutely nothing wrong with it. Some women like to hear compliments but if it’s on a first date compliment her about something family and friends would say. Don’t make a sexual comment her romantic partner would say. Most likely a friendly comment won’t backfire on the person making the compliment.

[Lovethedove]

You look ( gorgeous, beautiful, pretty, radiant, lovely) is perfectly fine & warmly accepted by most women on a date.

[coachTanthony]

I would agree!

[Goodwifie]

Like "you look beautiful tonight "
Don't see how that can go wrong. 😊

[coachTanthony]

I agree totally!

[Blightly]

lemme ask ya this. Watching talk shows / social media posts / listening to conversations / etc., I have an understanding that the complement you said is too generic and doesn't actually show that the guy cares. Are these women who make this argument wrong / too uptight, or is there truth to what they say?

[Goodwifie]

@Blightly I'll never get tired of my husband calling me beautiful it definitely means a lot to me when he tells me that.

[Sonorous]

Yes! Women love getting compliments on their looks. But still, have some restraint. It's best if you don't make it seem like that's all she has to offer. 👌

[SuperTroll]

I generally erred on the side of avoiding compliments for the most part, including on first dates. If I gave a compliment, it was usually quite honest and direct and humorous and not figurative. Instead I preferred to express interest more through physical touch and body language than flattery.

[SuperTroll]

From my standpoint, flattery yields some aspect of control, perhaps. It seems to be an act of submission to me; at least that's how I associate it psychologically. So I tended to refrain from it in that sense, wanting to retain the lead and edge I have over the situation.

[ChiTown33]

I don't know if it is the "metoo" movement, feminism, or what but women are hyper paranoid about compliments. I wouldn't do anything more than compliment her outfit, her hair or what have you if you think they look nice. It shouldn't be but in this day and age jusy saying something as innocuous as that she may still think you're being creepy.

[coachTanthony]

I think you have it backwards. Men are hyper paranoid about this crap not women!

[ChiTown33]

Why do you ask a question if you're just going to contradict the answers given. Compliment a woman see where that gets you. You got a 50/50 shot of it being recieved well.
I don't give a damn! I was raised to be a gentlemen i'm going to do it regardless of what she thinks
But don't tell me women aren't paranoid about this because they are.

[coachTanthony]

Agree to disagree. Thanks for the comments! Take a chill pill dude!

[ChiTown33]

If i get any more chill i'll be asleep. But my question stands. :)

[Sofie1979]

Yes cause we wanna known if we knock them out at first impression.

[coachTanthony]

I know right.

[Sofie1979]

Also depends on what we’re doing.

[ScarletAngel]

Complimenting her at earliest convenience but be honest about it too.

[21browngirl]

A decent compliment, which is not too cheesy is always appreciated in first date

[Dark93]

Yes. A simple compliment when you first meet. Outfit and hair compliments tend to do best in my very limited experience.

Don't compliment them too much after that, seems needy and overwhelming, unless they do something that warrants a compliment like a cute laugh or if they reveal some sort of skill or talent.

[GoodEnoughThen]

I dont know about complimenting wonen, but the first thing I say to any of my guy friends is how great their hair looks, but only if they are having an exceptionalhair day...

[kbbbb6]

Of course! Whats wrong with a compliment? It shows your interest and leads to conversation usually.

[CaptainSmartass]

When you first meet her, then yeah. But not after that.

Simples...

[MlleCake]

Compliment what you feel like complimenting. Make it polite, sincere, and don't gush.

[SarahsSummer]

Yes! It’s probably the very first thing you should do when you meet up with her.
💯

[sarahburberryy]

Sure ! it shows her how attentive u are to her looks ;)

[Miss_Savanna_Dry]

Yes, it's a good way to start out with something positive. Can even be an ice breaker

[zagor]

You can tell her she looks nice, like it is a reference to her style and dress, but referring directly to her physical appearance is not a good idea. Might as well say "man, I can't wait to fuck you".

[Dav1ss]

When you first meet up yes any more it gets creepy dont touch her too much

[nithya11]

Yeah definitely. If my date is looking good I'll compliment him

[Landshrk0068]

Yes, at the beginning of the date you should, later in the date, no, it's means you want something.

[Anonymous]

I've been conditioned that telling a woman that you like anything about her is patronizing or some BS, so I don't do it ever.

[Doodabeat]

You think they'll lose interest or respect for you but they won't.

[Opinion Owner]

@Doodabeat No it has nothing to do with that. Its because I hate frustration, like I'll do ANYTHING not to be frustrated, its such a negative feeling. If some girl I complemented took it the wrong way or gave me the shit I've heard from talk shows and other BS, it'd ruin my day for the next few hours.

[Lance1965]

If it is genuine, why not?

[coachTanthony]

Some have a problem with it so we will see if your question is answered!

[Gedaria]

Yes , it makes her feel better and you have noticed that she has tried to look good for you?

[WhoDatGuy]

Once, at the start. But all compliments should be giving without expectation of reward

[Eleni91]

Yes and I do especially if meeting in person for the first time.

[purplepoppy]

Only if you want a second date

[Anonymous]

I’d probably suggest complementing her outfit/makeup as opposed to her natural attributes.

[MistiGal]

Survey speaks for itself...👌

[Asad1ONE1]

The fact this question is asked often tells us where we as a society stand today. Sorry to say. 😔

[TacosRAwesome]

Why not... Most women like feeling pretty.

[anononon123]

Of course, but it can't be your main focus or topic of conversation

[pooper89]

It is polite to do it once but not more than that

[goodlongman]

Everyone loves compliments

[Guardian45]

I often don't wait for the first date.

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

If she looks good and you believe so then why not?

[DECENTSCOTTISHLAD999]

Yes of course l would and the list never ends

[brandito1st]

They tend to like that

[LuWe22]

Yes sure.

[CT_CD]

No..