Why do women go after bad men?

[asd_nasa]

This one is really annoying. It’s on of those behavioral tendencies that I have a difficult time understanding, as girls who do this often contradict themselves a lot. I’ll find a girl who is nice, polite and overall respectable, but when it comes to their dating preferences, they always lean towards cruel, cold guys that are often jerks to just about everybody. This one girl in particular was very strange; all her guy friends are super nice and everything, but when I knew her she was with this mean guy, and when she “broke up” with him she complained afterwards to me “are all guys dicks”, and I said that only the ones she’s been wanting are. Anyways a week or two later, prom comes up and she goes out with this guy who thinks of her like an object. I know this because all he ever talks about is wanting to fuck as many girls as he can. Unsurprisingly, prom night doesn’t go well for her, as apparently he lost interest in her and ignored her for the rest of the night in favor of some “hotter” girl. At this point I don’t feel sorry for her, she keeps picking the wrong guys while all the good ones are standing around with their jaws wide open. Why is this? I know she isn’t the only one, but why are so many girls like this?

[FunkyMonkee]

Got me!! They all CLAIM they want a guy liked me but they go after complete assholes ALL THE TIME!!! Then they come cry on MY shoulder and ask for advice. I'll say, "LEAVE HIM!!" They say, "I can't!" I ask, "Why not?" They say, "Because I LOVE him!!!" Well, I guess you'll just have to get used to being beaten up every day from now on, then!
My mother always said, "If a guy EVER hits me, he BETTER make it count because he'll NEVER get a second chance!!"
And you CAN'T just say, "Because THEY pick US!!" Because that's BULLSHIT!!! You have NO PROBLEM saying no to nice guys like me!! WHY can't you say it to an asshole? And there's been plenty of times where I've pointed out an abusive nature about a guy a girl was dating and she COMPLETELY ignored my advice to stay away from him!!! All I can say at that point is, "On your own head be it!"
One of my guitarists got a steady girlfriend, 3 of them over the course of his tenure in the band, one of which he married and then divorced a year or so later! Each one caught him fucking other girls behind their back time and time again and each one kept taking him back!! Eventually, we got a bass player whose girlfriend SEEMED to have a good head on her shoulders and she KNEW that Jason was like that with women!! Eventually, SHE ended up with him!!! My g/f & I were absolutely STUNNED that she, of ALL people, would end up with him!!!

[TenPoundTabby]

This is another one I totally get. Women (esp. early on) have a fatal attraction for abusive men, because confidence scrambles their defenses. Many younger women can't tell apart confidence from being a jerk and so they go for the jerks. Sadly, some women never learn, and those are the ones who end up abused, cheated on, and dead. Most of these women have nothing inside them character-wise that would say, "Hey, think twice", so they never see anything beyond the confidence/strength.

You're right to not feel sorry for this chick. She's dating and hopefully learning, but all her choices suck. Avoid her (and the ones like her) like the plague.

[Anonymous]

They usually don’t show their bad sides at first. It’s usually not until she’s already in love with him that she learns his true colors and then a) she’s already in love and b) she’s so confused how this good guy (they’re often really good at being charming and to pretend to be good guys for the girl they’re persuing) turned so bad all of a sudden and sometimes think SHE is the one who must how done something wrong to make him do these bad stuff or she buys into his excuses of how he’s so stressed, feeling depressed or whatever and that’s why he’s been behaving badly recently. To her it makes sense because she’s seen his good sides and believe that’s who he really is, when that’s not really the case.

Then there are some girls who are just attracted the carefree, confident, ”I don’t give a f about anything or anyone” attitude that some guys who are obviously bad already from the start have. Often these girls have some sort of mental issue or depression, had a troubled childhood, bad self esteem or something along these lines.

[Miss_Savanna_Dry]

It's the same reason why nice guys go after shallow bitches, it's exciting. And then those nice guys complain that girls are shallow and money hungry, and the nice girls complain that all guys are dicks. Overall both genders should stop running after the "bad" yet exciting people.

[asd_nasa]

It’s interesting you say that, but I should point out that nice guys who go after “shallow” girls know what they’re signing up for, and it’s usually not for anything more than a quick hookup, at least that’s what I’d do

[Miss_Savanna_Dry]

Some guys really fall for those shallow girls. That's how they get heartbroken. But I understand your point.

[Justacatlady]

Maybe it had to do with our primal instincts. The flashy strong confident guy tends to draw more attention.

[OlderAndWiser]

Many girls feel pressured into living a relatively obedient, clean cut, moral life, and, although girls claim to mature faster than boys, this is an area where that doesn't happen. When girls become aware of their sexuality and their power over guys, they see it as an opportunity to rebel and do all of the things that they never did because they were afraid. So they find a guy who is "dangerous" because they think it will make their life exciting and fulfilled. After a few years of being neglected or even abused, many of them finally mature, set aside their rebelliousness, and start looking for a guy who would be a good husband and good father.

Be patient and girls will get better.

[SnowFoxy1]

It's a matter of perceived dominance, in my view. Women flock to confident, independent men, because that determined survival in the past. Also, variable ratio reinforcement dictates that it is quite addicting.

[Aphrodite801]

This question you ducks keep asking is really annoying

[asd_nasa]

Sorry what, I didn’t quite understand your broken English

[Aphrodite801]

I bet you understood the rejection different girls said to you tho.

[asd_nasa]

Where are you from, just say what you mean to say in your original language so then I can translate it

[winterfox10]

I always assumed that it was because the women want to believe that they are the one who can make the jerk see the error in his ways.

[pervertedjester]

"Bad guys" are honest in their feelings. Nice guys are mostly liars.

[PrincessGrail]

They go after us.

[asd_nasa]

Maybe because they see an easy opportunity to take advantage of someone

[PrincessGrail]

Maybe

[asd_nasa]

And what goes through your head when they do go after you?

[PrincessGrail]

Bad boys can be very attractive. Ngl. And some of them really do have a heart of gold.

[asd_nasa]

There’s something wrong with you if you think cruelty is attractive

[PrincessGrail]

They’re not cruel. They’re charming.

[PrincessGrail]

It’s a certain mystique.

[asd_nasa]

Then don’t use the term bad boy, someone can come off as a bad boy but a true bad boy, is well, simply a bad boy if you get my meaning

[PrincessGrail]

We disagree about what the term means.

[asd_nasa]

Yes I think you’re right

[Galinda69]

cause their hotter obv

[asd_nasa]

Right because there aren’t hot guys who aren’t douche bags, gotcha

[Galinda69]

douche bags are hot I don't know im not a science geek

[asd_nasa]

I guess I’ll never understand

[Galinda69]

youd have to be a girl